Anyone not want their wedding

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
10748 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

I’ve changed my mind a million times. I think I’m finally happy with pretty much everything, but I could kick myself for not going this way at the start!

Post # 5
Member
291 posts
Helper bee

I had first set my mind on coral and a summer wedding. A few months in, I realized that I couldn’t find the right shade of coral and that I wasn’t patient enough to wait over 2 years to get married. We bumped the date back to April and started looking again at the color scheme. It was scary but in the end, I am SO happy with my new color scheme and glad that I changed it while I still had plenty of time!

Post # 6
Member
1329 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Wedding planning has made me so indecisive. I stress and worry over every unecessary detail. Its driving my FI and everyone close to me crazy. For the most part I love everything about my wedding, but I stress over the things I have no control over. Like if my guests will like the food, will they dance, will they enjoy themselves, will they leave early. I’m a total people pleaser, and this is the biggest event I will ever host, so I’m stressing. I need to really learn to relax though! 

Post # 7
Member
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I did it!  We were negotiating our contract for an absolutely stunning historical mansion with a beautiful bluff overlooking the sound.  Caterer made amazing food, the whole thing was going to be 5 hours of no-stop gorgeous.

And then we hit some bumps in the road with hidden fees.  In the process of recalibrating to a new price, I realized that I didn’t really want that wedding at all.  We went back to the drawing board and found an amazing kids’ sleep-away camp in the woods, where everyone could stay on-site for the whole weekend, and we’d be married in a clearing in the middle of the woods.  I get to play with my guests all weekend, and my fiance gets the white wedding that he has always dreamed of (maybe in a slightly more hippy barefoot way, but pretty close).

Post # 8
Member
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@Future_Ms.Bostonceltics:  Have you read A Practical Wedding?  My FI gave it to me last night, and ooooohmygod it changed EVERYTHING.

Post # 10
Member
4576 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@nearly-mrs-R:  We’re still fairly early-on into this thing, but there have been a couple of items where this has come up. I’m not good at replacing, though, because I get attached to the first idea…so I’ve found on a couple of things that I can say “screw it, i’ll just do both” 🙂

Post # 11
Member
1329 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@jdhall89:  I saw it on the iTunes book store, I was going to buy it for my ipad. I might just do it now with that rave review! Thanks! 

Wondering though, would it be worth my while to read it since my wedding is less than 2 months away??

Post # 12
Member
1327 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Totally.  I was lucky that FI and I discussed marriage very early and even before we were officially engaged we discussed wedding plans.  We had about a full year of throwing around ideas without making any final decisions or putting money into it.  It gave us time to change our minds and weed out a lot of things. 

@jdhall89:  A Practical Wedding is amazing.  I read it as soon as we started planning for real and it’s helped so much.  The ideas in it really helped me put things into perspective.

Post # 13
Member
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@Future_Ms.Bostonceltics:  Just read it!  My FI and I read it together and just couldn’t stop laughing about how well the book described me.  I actually called my mom afterwards and was like “I just spent the best $8 of my life so far.”  It’s definitely less of a wedding planning guide and more of a wedding coping guide.

Post # 14
Member
382 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

i did 3 almost 4 months before my wedding.

first it was going to be all DIY in a rental hall and i had to bring in my cater,alcohol ect.then i went with a banquet hall but you would use their cater ect….

i was so stressed about it all we ended up having it at the sheraton hotel were they did it all and i loved it 🙂 

Post # 15
Member
40 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@Future_Ms.Bostonceltics@jdhall89, @Kit_Kath:  Thank you for the book advice!  I too am losing my mind and getting seriously overwhelmed with the “Whose Wedding Is It Anyway?!” thoughts…

I recently finished “Emotionally Engaged: A Bride’s Guide to Surviving the “Happiest” Time of Her Life” and I feel like it did a fabulous job of helping me to understand what in the world is going on with my emotions and really helped prepare me for my upcoming marriage as opposed to just the wedding.  It also has some pretty great insight as to why it sometimes feels like everyone around you has suddenly lost their minds too!

OP: You’re doing the right thing, and you have plenty of time to make sure that you have the wedding that YOU want.  Move forward and don’t look back!  Good luck!

Post # 16
Member
682 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Planned a large (300+), rustic wedding in the mountains–even paid the deposit.  Scrapped it all, took a hit on the deposit and flew to Paris for an 11 person wedding in Luxembourg Gardens.

And I am so so happy I did!!

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