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well, maybe if you just moved the date that will probably ease the stress. That's what my FH and I did and trust me it helped!
Oh and have a change jar! Any change that you find or recieve put it in there get a saving account and deposit it there. That will help lots too, trust me! :)
I can't move the date, and that date is very important to me anyways. If I had the time, I would have done it a year later, but my grandpa is 81, not sure how much longer he's gonna be around! Not an option, but thanks for the idea!
What's the 1k for? If it's for a venue deposit, why not have the wedding in your backyard, or a family member's backyard? Then you can spend your 2k on some rented chairs and some heavy hors d'oeurves.
its for the cost of everything except for like the dress (which is being paid for by someone else, the only thing anyone is helping with!), his tux, and like favors. We already paid the non-refundable deposit. The backyard thing would have ended up costing more, I thought it would be cheaper, but apparently not. Just with the rental of tables, chairs, and a tent, then buying the food, and that ongoing list, it would have been stupid expensive. It's ironic, we won a nearly free reception, which is worth 4k, but we still have to pay for some of the things. So it's a good deal, just hard to come up with the rest of the money. we had to pay for the ceremony site, dj, cake, and a couple of other things, which ended up being that 2k.
we're seriously doing everything as cheap as possible, it's nothing extravagant by any means.
Can you have the ceremony in a local park (free) or close to the venue? Get a friend to go online and become an officiant for a day? Forget the DJ and use an ipod, assign a friend to the music, And how about making the cake yourself or asking a couple friends? I am sure it would taste better! Make something really simple using ribbons???
I can't say I fully understand you situation but I am feeling the strain on my wedding spinning out of control and being too much money. Now i am trying to find ways to cut it and keep it simple like i originally wanted. I really hope it all works out for you. :)
Well I already signed the contract, and I can't get out of it, go figure. At the time of signing it, I had this plan of donating my eggs (i sure as shit don't need them!!!), and all would have been fine, until they tell me oh yea, sorry you can't donate because 2 people in your family were alcoholics!!
So here I am stuck with this.....otherwise i'd totally downsize....
HouseofJ,
So did you already sign the contract for the DJ and the cake maker? Or was that just the venue? If no contract yet with DJ and cake maker, is there any way to find these cheaper, by using a laptop, or finding someone on Craigslist, and by buying sheet cakes or non-wedding cakes from a local bakery? If you're paying for favors, I would nix them-- they're just not necessary. Are you paying for invitations? If so, can you downgrade them?
Are there any services that you could offer in your area, to make a bit of extra money in the next year? Simple things like dog walking, or babysitting? Do you have anything you're not using that you could sell on eBay? Is it possible to pick up any shifts at a local restaurant?
Are there any other things you could cut/downsize in your normal life? Downgrade your cell package, go to basic television, etc?
I know this maybe sounds very incensitive, but...elope? cheap, easy and you will be happy without having to worry about money issues which believe me will always be held over your head!
Why not scale way, way back and just have your immediate families and 2-3 close friends? That way you can have a $500 dinner at a nice restaurant and be done with it? If you can't afford it, you can't afford it.
I know sometimes things seem impossible, but you'll get there. Just have to have hope and a good attitude.
Have a garage sale and get rid of things you don't use around your house anymore, or try to sell them on craigslist. Even if you feel like you need it or want to keep it, just ask yourself which is more important, the item, or a wedding?
Stop buying gifts! People will totally understand. Well, maybe not your son, but adults will. It's the thought that counts. A homemade card and a batch of cookies or cupcakes can go a long way, or try to offer services instead, saying you can offer them some house cleaning, car wash, lawn wedding/mowing, something. There is always something to do.
Really cut down on your food budget, if you haven't already. My hubby and I were paying $100 a week at the grocery store just because we weren't careful with our money. None of that now that I'm unemployed! I make a grocery list and stick to it! I make sure we only get one or two "junk food" items, because I know if we didnt get any we'd feel deprived and splurge the next week, I also am sure to have a "cheap night" every week, where we eat something like chilimac- 2 boxes of cheap macaroni and cheese with a can of chili beans. Not the greatest, but not the worst, and it saves money. Last week, we spend $60 on groceries and neither of us starved, and even had leftovers for lunches! I'm sure we could have saved even more if I would have made cheaper dinners as well. try buying in bulk when you can.
Cut back on internet service, if you arent using dial up. DSL is expensive, but you could probably find dial up for $10 a month, unless you only have a laptop.
That said, usually you can get out of contracts. If you can't pay, you can't pay! Generally for wedding things, it just means you wont get your deposits back. You really don't need a DJ, honest! We used an ipod that we borrowed from someone, but cds would work too! We also did cupcakes instead of a cake to save money. Hubby and I had a small cake so we could cut it together, but everyone else had cupcakes, and they loved them!
You could have a potluck dinner where everyone brings something so you don't have to worry about food, or a picnic lunch reception in the park so you don't even need tables and chairs, and could serve things like subway sandwhiches ($5 foot longs!)! Heck, you don't even need to serve food at all! You could have ONLY cake and thats it! (works best in the evening, after 7 or so).
I know this is going to sound harsh, but if you really want THAT date, and it's very important to you to hurry so your grandfather can be there, you need to stop this attidude! It's not important if you have a DJ, or a cake, or favors (people dont like them anyway!) or even a wedding dress!! What is important is that the two of you will be married and spending the rest of your life together! You have plenty of time to have the wedding of your dreams, so don't sell yourself short now just to be done in a rush. Have a small, intimate wedding (cutting back the guest list really cuts costs!) so that your grandfather can witness the wonderful, magical moment when you and your FI say "I do" and stop stressing about the rest. Heck yeah it's a bummer, but a lot of people do this and then have a wedding later when they can afford it. Be realistic, if you REALLY can't afford these things you want and if there is NO WAY you can cutback on ANYTHING or save money ANYWHERE, then you need to give this vision up for now and try something else. You can do something or not, and that's your call.
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By completely calling it off??? I have to come up with 2k in a year, 1k of that by November 25th. It's not looking like it's going to happen. So i'm seriously debating saying f*ck it all, because it's really depressing right now. Anyone else felt like that???
I am trying to pay for it but then my MIL's 50th bday party came up, then fathers day, and in a few weeks it will be my son's bday!! I have no money and no way to really save any. It's so stressful. And he can't pitch in since he keeps a roof over my head and the bills paid.
It sucks, but it's currently a possibility....