Anyone Under 25?

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: What is your age, and how long have you been with your SO?
    I am 20 or younger : (20 votes)
    6 %
    I am 21-25 : (174 votes)
    51 %
    I am 26-30 : (37 votes)
    11 %
    I am 31-35 : (7 votes)
    2 %
    I am 36+ : (3 votes)
    1 %
    I have been with my SO less than 1 year : (15 votes)
    4 %
    I have been with my SO over 1 year : (18 votes)
    5 %
    I have been with my SO 2+ years : (46 votes)
    13 %
    I have been with my SO 3+ years : (23 votes)
    7 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    4043 posts
    Honey bee

    @peachykeener:  No longer waiting! But I dated my DH for 9 years before getting engaged and 10 years before marrying him. We started dating at 15 and 17, got married at 25 and 27. 

    We didn’t want to get married until we were both financially and emotionally stable. For us, that meant finishing college (we both graduated 3 1/2 years ago), having stable jobs with good incomes and getting out of early 20’s. It’s what we wanted and what worked best for us.

    As for advice, it’s great you feel ready for marriage, but does your SO feel ready? While it’s not true for all guys, a lot of guys don’t feel ready so young. So you may have to reconcile your feelings with your SO’s. If he is ready and you are both confident you are ready for marriage, then that’s great. But if isn’t, you may need ot wait a little longer. Good luck OP!

    (Fyi, everybody gets judged for something. It’s either too young, too old, waiting too long, getting married to early, etc. If you are confident in your decision, there is no need to mind other people’s judgments.) 

    Post # 4
    Member
    2062 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @peachykeener:  I don’t think you are the anomoly you seem think you are Smile

    Post # 5
    Member
    767 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    We got engaged on our 4 year anniversary we were both 19 🙂 We will be together for 6 years and 6 months on our wedding day and we will be 22. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    2052 posts
    Buzzing bee

    @peachykeener:  I dated my so 3+ years.

    I put 26-30, but I’ll be 31 in March.  LOL!

    ETA:  I’ve always wanted to get married and have kids.  I was more okay with waiting when I was younger….I just didn’t want to rush anything, wanted to finish school, and the first man I was with didn’t ask and honestly it was the BEST thing he never did for me because that was a terrible relationship!

    I wanted to get married very bad after this relationship still and was in a few awful relationships (I have NO IDEA why I wasted my time like that) and I’m so glad they didn’t ask because again, I just might have said yes for the wrong reasons!!

    NOW I’m in a relationship with the best man I’ve ever dated.  I feel like I went from ‘Hoping to get married one day’ to ‘finding the one’ and that is why I found the waiting hive, from googling the preengagement process and to see if anyone had been through what I’ve been through.

    My point is that, I feel like most of us on here are marrying types, and we’ve always been.  Once you find the one, you just know, and it changes everything!!  I just hope that your man is the right one for you!!

    Post # 7
    Member
    767 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    I turn 24 in January and have been with my SO for almost 8 years. Having got together just after turning 16, we would have been too young before now. I really began to feel the want to be married at about 21. We wanted Uni, jobs and to move in together to come first. We’ve done those, so I certainly feel antsy about what he’s waiting for now! 

    Post # 8
    Member
    45 posts
    Newbee

    I put 21-25, but I’ll be 26 in February. My BF and I will be approaching the three year mark then too…

    Post # 9
    Member
    2486 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2016

    I don’t think you should feel guilty at all! I’m 23 and am about to be engaged for a SECOND time! I got bit with the marriage bug at age 6. lolol the first time I got engaged I was 20, and had just had a baby. I tend to move at lightspeed 🙂 My SO and I have been together for a little more than a year, and I am expecting a ring sometime in Spring. 

    Post # 10
    Member
    1137 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @peachykeener:  Don’t feel guilty! Everyone has their own pace moving forward 🙂

    I am a young bee too. Wanted to get married to FI since I am 19, but will be 22 when we get married 😉

    Post # 11
    Member
    212 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    22 will be 23 in 3 months. We’ve been toether 5 1/2 years.

    Post # 12
    Member
    3420 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    I’m 21 (SO is 24) and have been with my SO for 3 years. We will be getting engaged in 2014. I am almost done with school (thank god!) and my SO works full time. We already share money and live together so marriage won’t really change anything for us other than my name. I think that if you are deeply committed “waiting” is hard, but you know it will happen so for me it isn’t as hard. You are not alone! make sure your SO is ready though.

    Post # 13
    Member
    3280 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    We got engaged when I was 19 (now 20) and Fi was 21. I never felt like I was waiting though (besides the two months between buying the ring and getting engaged). We knew we were ready summer 2012 so that’s when we bought the ring! Age really doesn’t matter to us. It is very common here to get married by 21 and the majority of our high school class is engaged. We will graduate with our bachelor’s degrees, already bought a house and new cars have good careers so there’s really no reason for us to wait. We had been best friends in high school and dated for a little over 2 years when we got engaged. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    998 posts
    Busy bee

    I voted 20 or younger, and that I’ve been with my SO for over a year. I’m 19, and I’ve been with my 18 year-old DBF for a bit over a year and a half, and we’ve been talking a lot about getting engaged lately. Yesterday, DBF admitted that the only thing holding him back from proposing is that he doesn’t have a ring, if that gives you any idea. Our relationship is awesome – while we haven’t dated many other people, we are quite happy and very certain that marriage is right for us.

    In terms of advice, I would ask how ready your SO is for getting engaged. I don’t know how old your SO is, but if he’s around the same age, many guys aren’t ready to propose by your age. There are a few that would love to do so, such as my DBF. If he’s not ready, you may have to wait a little longer, unfortunately.

    Also, realize that getting engaged doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to get married soon. I’m not sure what your personal views are on what makes someone ready for getting engaged (should the couple be at the right place relationship-wise, or do they have to be 100% ready to get married tomorrow if they had to?), but I’d consider your feelings about longer engagements.

    In my case, DBF and I would be engaged for around two to three years, but we also have a high chance of eloping when the time comes. If we both were gungho for a wedding, we’d certainly be waiting much longer. Due to us being fairly early into our relationship, a longer engagement is even more important; I know that around the two-year point in a relationship, things change drastically, so I certainly don’t want to marry during the honeymoon period.

    Welcome! You may not be in the majority here, but there some of us in your boat. 🙂

     

    Post # 15
    Member
    564 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    No judgement at all!

    I’ll be 25 in March, so I just barely qualify, but I was 22 when I decided I wanted to marry my SO….and I’m still waiting.

    Everyone’s relationships progress at different stages, I’ve known couples who marry in their early twenties, and couples who marry in their forties! There is no “one size fits all”

    Post # 16
    Member
    935 posts
    Busy bee

    @peachykeener:  technically not waiting as we decided we are going to hold off marriage for another 4-6 years.. But I am only 20 and have been with my SO for 2.5 years and known him for 6. I have wedding fever but I know for us it makes sense to wait until we are in our mid twenties to tie the knot. 

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