Anyone wait for their SO to be ready then got cold feet once SO came around?!

posted 3 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
Member
75 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

YEP! my hubby sounds pretty much the same….he wanted us to have lots of money in the bank first before TTC, with his timeline being 3-5 years. I’ve had baby fever for the past year and wanted a baby like now!

However, since the wedding he has done a 180 and wants to TTC, asking how long it would take. Meanwhile, I’m freaking out now that it’s a reality! It’s hard to beleive that we are actually going to be DOING this now. I feel exactly the same way as you, so take comfort that you aren’t alone! Right now we are NTNP, and if nothing happens by summer we plan to start actively TTC.

Post # 4
Member
416 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Totally felt that way for a moment, though I was the same way about marriage too.  It’s like, you get these ideas in your head, but they’re all hypothetical because you’re waiting on someone else to say okay.  Then he pops the question or says let’s have a baby, and suddenly it’s real and no longer hypothetical.  And then you’re like, “wait, am I sure I’m really ready for this?”

Marrying him was definitely the right move, and I’m currently 32 weeks pregnant, so it’s a little late to turn back on that either.  I think you never feel 100% ready, and the wave of excitement-immediately-followed-by-terror I got when the pregnancy test was positive was totally normal I thnk.  Just talk to your FI about it, because for me, knowing we were both scared helped me feel much better about it.  And GL on whatever you decide!

Post # 6
Member
112 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@turnanewleaf:  Aww, I totally feel you, though DH and I almost had the opposite happen. Believe it or not, he has been waiting for me to be ready for starting our own little family.  When he finally caught wind that I was starting to feel ready, it totally freaked him out! He was like OMG OMG Can we really do this? Can we be parents?

All this being said, 6 months later, we still really aren’t trying super hard and we qualify under telling people “we’re not realllllly trying but we’re not preventing”, and I’m still kind of freaked out!  So I totally hear you.

Post # 8
Member
1847 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@turnanewleaf:  It wasn’t exactly that I was waiting for DH to be ready, we were both waiting to get past the window of time where I couldn’t get pregnant or it would really mess up some travel plans for next summer. Now that we’re in the “relatively safe” window, I’m kind of getting anxious!! I’m just having a tough time wrapping my brain around the fact that if we BD in the next week or so, there’s a shot that I might get pregnant! We haven’t BD since I went off of BC last week, so I think once we get the first time ‘out of the way,’ then I won’t be such a head case! 🙂

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