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Hey there... What city do you live in? If there isn't a large Vietnamese center where you live, it'll be pretty difficult to get an ao dai made for you. Can you ask your FI if he'll ask his family in Vietnam to purchase the material for you? or have it made? If your FI's family is anything like mine, they would be incredibly honored to be asked and would really LOVE the opportunity to be involved in that way. Then you can go get measured where you live and they can have it made. Ask them to have it made a little bit loose, then have it taken in when you get it. My cousin did that and it looked great. You should probably allow a couple months to have it done. Your dress actually doesn't HAVE to be red. But that is the most traditional color for brides in ao dais.
I just want to say that really sweet of you to wear an Ao Dai for your Vietnamese Fiancee. I love it when I see mixed couples doing things from their partner's background. Very sweet!! Congrats and the best of luck!!
I just wanted to second everything hotwings and dearmissie said. I'd order in the next couple months, because especially if you ask his family to get it made for you in Vietnam and brought back, it will probably need some minor alterations. Ao dai are made to fit so closely to one's figure (from the waist to the neck to the length of your arms, unlike a typical strapless wedding dress, for example), that you want plenty of leeway to get it altered.
I'd be careful of online sites.. especially for a wedding ao dai. my sister ordered a couple (she was my MOH) and it looked nice on the rack but even with the measurements, it didn't seem to fit her right all the way. It was fine for her, but if you're the bride you don't want an ill-fitting ao dai on your wedding day.
If you live in the Washington DC area, there are some places that can custom make for your or rent them out.
Otherwise, you should ask your FI if you can send measurements over to Vietnam to have his family order it and have it made. Much cheaper and better quality than doing it online.
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HELP! My family is Polish and German but my fiance is Vietnamese. We will be incorporating Vietnamese customs in our wedding. I know that my Ao Dai needs to be red - but other than that I am not sure. Where do I order from, what should I look for to prevent being scammed or overcharged, how far in advance of my wedding should I order, and any other helpful/useful information. His parents are deceased and the rest of his family lives in Vietnam. Thank you ladies!