Post # 1
My boyfriend and I are serious, and we know we want to spend the rest of our lives together (I feel so blessed to know this at a young age) and we decided we will get married either after I finish college, or during my last year…sometime in the somewhat-ish near future!
Anyway my question is, I don’t feel like he is just my “boyfriend”, but he is also not a “fiance” or a label like that. Is there any intermediary between the two names that I could call him? I would feel weird calling him my “fiance” because we aren’t engaged, and I feel like “partner” sounds more for the homosexual lifelong “partners” (Thats the only time I hear that word used for relationship status) – and finally, I also feel that boyfriend isn’t enough.
Any help here?
Post # 3
Before we got engaged I wasn’t ever into calling FH a boyfriend either. I referred to him as my ‘manfriend’ or my ‘partner’
Post # 5
i think every girl goes through a period like this….where they know they are going to get married to their boyfriend and they feel engaged but aren’t, and bf doesn’t seem to do the relationship justice. personally, i actually really dislike the word fiance and always feel pretentious when i say it, even though we are engaged. FI feels the same way…when it’s just us we practice using husband and wife. even though it kind of sucks, sometimes you just have to be patient and accept that YOU know you will get married, and that has to be enough. you could maybe use the term “committed” in some way, or wear a promise ring. in the end though, it’s just a waiting game that i think all girls go through.
Post # 6
I think Significant Other is a pretty commonly acceptated term to use.
Post # 7
I never figured this out either. I definitely felt like “partner” made people wonder if I was in a same-sex relationship, but would use it occassionally.
I hated fiance too. So happy to have finally settled into husband/wife territory. Feels totally right.
Post # 8
I stick to “partner” personally, but it fits my personality and politics pretty well!
Post # 9
I totally understand, and really felt like that too. When referring to eachother, we’d often use “my guy”/”my girl”. I feel like there’s no real “status” attached to that title (or lack-thereof, which is the problem!). When talking to ‘authority’ (the doctor, school administration, etc.) we would usually just ‘white lie’ and call eachother FI. It made life SOO much easier, because people DO respect that a lot more than ‘bf’.
Congrats on finding ‘The One’ by the way!! It’s a WONDERFUL feeling (I remember I always just “knew”), and I hope the waiting phase doens’t last too long for you!!
Post # 10
I would use “partner”, but I have to agree with Sapphire Sun with the “partner” classification.
I’ll have to let my….boyfriend/prehubby/partner/sigother/manfriend of these! haha
Post # 12
after about 6-8 months, i felt odd saying boyfriend (he had just turned 30..it was weird), so i just stopped refering to him as anything other than his first name. sometimes people would ask, ‘oh is this your bf/fiance/husband?” and i would say boyfriend at that point. but for the most part i just stopped using any “category” until we were engaged.
Post # 13
I used “partner,” but I’m in academia, and everyone uses that term, gay or straight.
Post # 14
I hate ‘fiance’ as does my SO – so we like to invent things based on who we are talking to – my current fav is ‘man-lover’ (can’t wait till he is my hubby!)
Post # 15
my roomie calls them “man-beasts” 😛 I liked it!
Post # 16
Personally, I would stick with boyfriend. I’m in my late 20s and my guy is in his early 30s and we used the boyfriend/girlfriend terms up until we were engaged. No one seemed to think it was odd or think we weren’t serious about each other.
I understand the desire to have a more serious (and adult) sounding term, so if I were to suggest one it would probably be significant other.