Post # 1
My fiance’s father passed away about a month ago.
Our wedding is at the end of this month.
We’d like to honor him in some way, but we’re not big on the whole lighting the candle, or placing a flower on the empty chair. It was very hard for him to deal with and we don’t want to make a big deal about it. God knows, his father would’ve hated all the attention!
Is it inappropriate to list both of his parents and add a footnote next to his father’s name with the words "In Loving Memory". It seems so dry and "text book".
Post # 3
I don’t think it is inappropriate at all. I think it’s touching.
Are you talking about making a footnote in the program? Maybe you don’t need to write a footnote. Just write it next to his name….
You know, everyone grieves differently. And everyone honors their loved one either by the way they know their deceased person would have wanted to be honored/remembered, or in a way that is bearable for themselves.
So I think you can follow your fiance’s lead and do what is best for him and his family. If that means no candle or release of birds/butterflys etc- then by all means do what is most reflective of your in-laws side.
That has to be so tough to go through. I am so sorry for your fiancé’s loss.
Post # 4
Im’ so sorry for your FI’s loss. We are honoring my brother simply by mentioning that the acoustic guitar music is in his honor because we always said he’d play guitar at my wedding
Something subtle is usually the best way to go in this situation.
Post # 5
I’m sorry for your FH loss. I agree that you should follow his lead and not try to push anything to emotional or over-the-top on him during your special day. My FH lost his dad a few years ago, but still doesn’t want to draw a lot of attention to it.
Post # 6
I’m so sorry for your loss. I think the program note you mentioned sounds like a wonderful idea. I agree that you could also write "In loving memory" after his name if you did not want to make a footnote.