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So, DH is a huge hockey nut, and I've told him in the past that most hockey players in the nhl have birthdays in Jan-feb because they get the advantage of an extra year in hockeythan most kids their age.... Why is this important? He's decided that he wants a Jan baby, so it looks like April is our Ttc month! !!!! so now it's off to the doc to get those ovaries working! Lol
@anotherbee:My husband has similar logic so it looks like April will be our TTC starting month as well! Good luck to you!
Haha, glad to know I won't be alone!(and that I'm not the only one with a silly DH...lol). Looking forward to comparing notes with you :)
Goodluck! just keep in mind not everyone conceives as soon as they start trying, so if you want a January baby you might have to start trying sooner than april
Oh yeah, we'll aware of that. I wouldn't be surprised if we ended up with a march or April baby :) which is fine by me :)
Ya, we know as well. His idea is that we aim for a january baby but if it doesn't happen we just keep trying and get as close as possible. Which also means not trying right now :( Thats ok, it is a small price to pay for him to be happy and on board with TTC. And Yes, it would would be great to talk to others going through the same things at the same time, and with silly, but lovable DH's
@anotherbee: Haha, I've heard that about NHLers, too! Good luck in TTC. :)
I'm hoping I can gt DH on board in feb. we want to avoid a decamber baby, so march is out, but I'm hoping I can get him on board for feb :) we'llkeep going too, but DH doesn't know about these things like we all do so he thinks it'll happen in April. He says he has "super sperm" :)
Do youhugs share his love of hockey? dH has gotten me into it, but I'm a Habs fan he likes the leafs :) hehehe
We both like hockey, but I wouldn't say we are big fans. After hearing the thing about NHL birthdays, DH felt this was a good idea, not just for athletics but academics and other areas of life as well. That being said, we are going to a local hockey game in a couple days with the rest of my family. My mother is a big hockey fan.
@Vitafilm:You mention academics, etc. I was wondering about this because here, the cut off for kindergarten is Dec 31. Which to me means that a Jan baby will be delayed by a year. For example, if our baby is born on jan 10, 2013, and has a cousin that was born on Dec 20, 2012, our baby will be ayear behind, even if only 3 weeks younger. Does that make sense? But I guess would still be that much older than those born later in 2013. I dunno, I guess it's just a little confusing to me. My birthday is in oct, so I wasalways younger than everyone, graduated at 17, not 18, but I neverseemed to be at a disadvantage or anything. Oh well..... We're off to watch the winter classic today with friends. Should be fun!
@anotherbee: Yes I think we are the same here with the dec 31 cut off although I believe the parents now have the right to choose when the child starts school (more in the case of holding a child back).In regards to academics, I think the idea is that the child will be at an advantage because they will have that much more chance to learn skills they will need in school. I work with preschool kids as a speech therapist, kindergarten readiness is one thing I consider when recommending treatment for a child. The idea is that if a child goes to school with a disadvantage or skills not yet learned they may struggle to keep up with a standard curriculim and therefor think that they are not a good student. Now this really applies more to children with delays and disorders, but if it were my own child I would want to give them the biggest advantage possible. It also is a big generalization, I am also an October birthday and did just fine in school, and felt quite good about being the smallest in my class because I was interested in gynastics.
Yikes, Parenting is hard and I am not even a parent yet!
@Vitafilm:Ok that's good to know. I've never had to think about kindergarten before, so I never really thought about it :) since we're both in Canada it seems like our school guidelines would be the same...
Curoius, when in oct is your birthday? I'm on the 7th.
I used to work inpreschool, but I never had toworry aboutthese type of things or school readiness. I guess it makes sense to give them the extra advantage... I never saw it like that but as a disadvantage.... Good to have that perspective!
@anotherbee: We are pretty close, I am Oct. 15th, as for school readiness, I think that this is only one small little factor, it didn't really bother me too much becuse I feel pretty good about my ability to help a child learn in the preschool years, but it seems important to DH, and I can't really complain that I have a DH who is already thinking about the well being of our not yet concieved child and the the best timing of TTCing.
I have to admit that while my baby fever is in high gear, I am happy to have the time to prepare and feel I am ready with prenatals and finances and stuff. We had a pregnancy possibliity in the summer, and while we both felt we were ok with the idea I was surprised how not upset I was when the test was negative, only because I was not taking prenatals and didn't really want to be pregnant at our wedding. Not to mention wanting it to be a excited and happy decision for us both, this way it feels like something we both really want. Ok too much rambling.. only 3 months til April!
hardly enough rambling...that's why I created this thread! Lucky for you you DH shows enthusiasm about TTC. I know mine wants a baby, and is planning when he wants to have it but beyond that I get "why should i be excited about the crying and sleep deprivation?" ugh. It's funny, cause it's true, but I wish he'd show a little more enthusiasm about the whole thing.
He actually mentioned that it would be ok to start trying after our trip to Montreal in March, but it all depends 1) on if I have a job, and 2) if I actualy o. I've got a doctor's apt on thursday to get that ball rolling....
I just started my prenatals again this morning. I had gotten some, but they aren't covered by our health plan, so I stopped taking them, and just bought a generic brand. Once I'm KU, I'll switch to the good expensive ones :)
@anotherbee:well, DH is not excactly excited about the infant stage either. We have an almost 3 year old neice and he does say he is excited to have a child that age. He is really good with her considering he has zero experiance with kids. I think they come around when the babies are more of a reality.
I have been extremely lucky with the other stuff. I went off BCP after our wedding in Sept. when the dog ate the last two weeks of pills, oops! Anyway,we decided there wasn't much point getting any more in case my cycles didn't come back right away. So far things are looking good.
I started the prenatals on Jan 1st so it looks like we will be ready to go in april, as long as the basement renovations are still on track, fingers crossed, I really don't want that stress on top of TTCing.
Good Luck wth your Dr. appt. I will cross the other fingers for you!
@Vitafilm: I wish now that I had stopped the pill earlier, but I didn't want to end up with AF on my wedding or honeymoon, so I stuck it out till after we got back. Oh well. Lots can happen in 3 months. I'm optimistic.
I'm hoping I don't have family history of infertility. It took my mom 7 years to get preggers with her first, or atleast it was 7 years after they got married. Unforunately it was stillborn but my sis was born about 18 mons later, and me 3 years after that. But my sis had no problems, so we'll see.
Good luck with the renos! I can't imagine going through that while preggers or with an infant!
My DH is pretty good with my sister's kids too. I love watching him with my niece (two in march), he's been so good with her from the get go. Oddly enough, I started dating him about the same time that I found out my sis was preggers with her, so that's kinda cool :)
@anotherbee: being good with your niece is a good sign that he will come around as soon as it is his baby crying and keeping him up at night. At least that is what I am hoping.
Yeah, I think he will. We've talked about it, so I know he'll be there to help out.... He just doesn't seem excited yet...oh well :)
Do you and DH have friends who have kids? I lot of my DH's work friends have small children and I think when we are trying or pregnant he will be a lot more interested in talking to them about kids, but he does really right now. I also think he will have more in common with some of my friends husbands who do have children, where right now that isn't really the case. It seems like it is more something women talk about before the fact than men. But then again a lot of my friends have kids or work with kids. I also have no choice but to talk about kids at work. I am the only person of child bearing age in an office full of nurses who work with newborn babies and are primed to be grandmothers. I can't call in sick or say I am tired without 2 or 3 people asking if I am pergnant
@Vitafilm: My sister's kids are really the closest we've got. She's got 3: 6 years, 4 years, and 22 months. He is great with them, esp the baby. I actually got him to babysit all three of them not too long ago, and they all survived, so I know he'll be fine.
I've never seriously thought about having a baby until we got married, so it never concerned me much before. I guess it still doesn't now, I get where he's coming from.
We only have one couple friend that has a kid, and she's 4. Her father (DH's friend) is very strange about kids. I don't think he ever wanted them, but they got preggers accidentily. I know he loves her, but he comes off as indifferent to her sometimes (not in an abusive way at all) so I don't think he's the best person for DH to be around when talking kids :) fortunately, my BIL (sister's hubby) is a great guy, and a great dad, so i'm hoping that DH will turn to him as we move closer. They are really good friends too.
I don't have it nearly as bad as you about calling in sick, but I feel as though i need to make a point of having a beer/wine when we're out to show that I'm not preggers. Everyone knows that I want one, and my aunt is the nurse for the most popular OBGYN in town, so they're all on the look out for me to get KU.
I think part of the people at work thing is that I too have a very known case of baby fever, everyone knows I want a baby soon, like yesterday. I am not old but I am not getting any younger either. DH husband is 4 years younger so that is also a bit of hurdle but I think we are pretty much past that now. Most women want babies sooner anyway so itis not that big of a deal. And DH understands that if he would like to have children with me then he may need to be ready little sooner. But it will all happen. Now I just need to hurry up a wait and try to think of a way to not give it away when it does happen, I guess that I what these boards are for, thank goodness for them.
@Vitafilm:Omg I know. I don't know how I'll keep it to myself after we get a BFP. I'll want to wait until 6 weeks or so to tell the fam, and probably 12-14 before we announce. dH is horrible at keeping secrets and SIL loves to put her life on Facebook. It'll be a challenge, but I don't want to announce before 12 weeks at the earliest. I'll be on these boards all.the.time once that happens.
Have you thought of any ways to tell your DH once it happens?
@anotherbee: I had grand ideas of giving him a gift, maybe a book about being a new father, but that went out the window pretty quick when DH said he wanted to be there when I tested. Well not right there, but he wants us to read the results together. So now I am thinking of ways to tell the rest of our family. I think we will tell our parents and my sister/BIL pretty quickly. Then everyone else after 12 weeks. DH is an only child and his mother has been helping us do some painting around the house, so I was thinking about getting some paint chips in pink and blue and telling her we were "painting the same room, what colour did she think we should use?" and with my family I haven't thought of anything yet, maybe having my 3 year old niece annouce it somehow. What about you? Any good ideas? But I haven't really thought about it.... Haha Just kidding;)
@Vitafilm: DH is always saying about how he wishes I was preggers to that we could use those special parking spots they have forpregnant ppl and withyoung babies, so i'd to take him to tmall all and tell him to pull into one of those spots... Don't know if I'd be able to keep it from him long enough though. Also, his birthday is in early may, so itiSight work out as a bay present for him:)
I'd thought about getting my 6 y/o nephew to announce to the rest of thefamily too, but I'm not really sure.
When we go public with it, I'd love to take a picture of DH and then a + and then me with an = 3, but I don't know if I'll be able to orchestrate that..... Might not be too hard...
On a separate note, please excuse all the horrendous typos.... My new ipad has auto correct from hell and I swear it types it's own words.... Gah!
@anotherbee:I love the parking spot idea, but i don't know if I could keep that secret for long enough. When my best friend was pregnant she had a shirt made up the had a similar idea of 'mommy + 9 months= Baby' printed on it.
I think I really need a good idea for announcing at work, 90% of my colleagues are public health nurses that visit newborns and babies regularly so I think something special would be really fun. I just don't know what yet!
@Vitafilm: well, fortunately you've got about 5 months to think about it (if all goes according to plan!)
I jsut got back from my GP, and I'm off to an OBGYN. Hopefully he will be more helpful that she was...*eye roll*
It must be a Canadian boy thing...my DH has the same line of thinking (Hockey & January babies)... it kind of cracks me up but I'll go with it!
As for school (I'm a K-2 teacher), in my experience and from what I've researched, the K-readiness/maturity issue is more exagerated in boys than girls. I have girls born at the end of Dec in my class who are leaps and bounds ahead of their earlier month peers. But - every child is different and every parent knows whats best and when they are ready for school. In our province, you can choose to keep your child home from K an extra year, but research shows that it doesn't benefit (in fact, they do better the earlier they are in school beginning to learn letters, sounds, social expectations, etc). There was a really interesting article in the Globe and Mail recently on that. Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell is also a super thought-provoking book!
Funny how parenting begins well before even TTC!!
@missbeachbum: What province are you from?
Funny that you mention The Outliers book. That's where i got the tidbit of info about hockey players that started this whole thing...lol
It is funny how we're already making "parenting" decisions without a little bean yet. Oh well. It makes me feel closer to TTC and having baby, and it's all I've got control over right now, so i'll go with that!
Even though DH wants hockey players, i've decided we're having girls only (lol) so it won't matter anyways :)
Parents can choose to keep their child out of school an extra year. My sister did this with my nephew. The cut-off in their district was September 1, my nephew's birthday is August 29. He just wasn't mature enough to start school yet.
(And remember, it's NOT saying anything bad about your child's intelligence if you wait a year to put them in school. My nephew is a smart kid, he's in gifted program, he just wasn't ready the first year he could go to school.)
@anotherbee - I'm from New Brunswick. I'd be happy with all girls too, though DH desperately wants to spend the rest of our life in hockey rinks! I told him I wouldn't be a very good hockey mom - I get so stressed out ! (I couldn't even watch the third period of World Juniors!)
I agree that thinking about these things makes it easier to wait to TTC.... soon there will be lots of decisions to make!
Here's the article I was talking about: I found it really interesting (and a contrast to The Outliers). I originally read it on Globe and Mail but could only find the New York Times version.
I completely agree with the boys and girls thing, most of my caseload is boys, but from what I see they most will even out as they mature. And your right it totally depends on the child and each parent needs to do what is right for thier child and family.
What is it with the 'outliers' book, my DH read it too and is often starting conversations from information he read in it. I wonder if the author knows the book is having an effect on the TTC community?
@anotherbee: sorry the GP wasn't helpful, hopefully the OBGYN is more so and you are on track for April. Us ladies with hockey loving, book reading DH's have to stick together :)
@missbeachbum: I'm in Fredericton :)
Thanks for posting that article. It bring back a previous point that I had though. It says that younger kids do better in school. To me, that means that an Oct baby would have the advantage (given the Dec 31 cut off for kindergarten) than a January baby would. The Oct baby would get to go to school at 4, and turn 5 a month after starting, where as the Jan baby would have to wait until they are 5 before starting.
Am I thinking that out correctly? Or do I have it confused?
I'm thinking about it like this: I went to school with sisters. one was born Feb 1982, I was born Oct 1982, and the younger sis May 1983. I was in the same grade as old sis, even though i'm closer in age to younger sis. to me, Younger sis had the advantage because she started school 3 months younger than when older sis did. And with older sis and I, even though we were in the same grade, she was 8 months older than I when we started school together. to me, I'm at the advantage with the fall birthday, rather than her being at the advantage with the winter birthday.
@anotherbee ... No way! I don't think I've ever met another NB bee before!
I think your reasoning makes sense, according to what the article says. The research study they did this year on the 26 Canadian elementary schools seems to say that the younger kids can start school, the better. I'm guessing the benefits are heightened, though, with disadvantaged children. Since they probably aren't exposed to books, letters, numbers, etc...the earlier they can start and get that vital exposure, the better. If parents are pro-active in teaching their child early skills it probably wouldn't matter what month they were born and when they started (that's just my opinion, though).
There are a few NB bees around, but not many!
@vitFilm yes! We need to stick together! Even though my DH doesn't like to read really, he likes the idea. I'm sure he'll try to get the girls to play hockey :) I tease Hume about supporting a boy in dance if that's what he wants rather than hockey..... dH doesn't like that :)
I can only imagine that what year the child starts school and what sports they want to play will be the least of our worries, but right now it seems really important. I am just worried that I will be the most neurotic parent ever because I work with children who have difficulties and I know just enough about what can go wrong to freak me out.
I hear ya! I have my ECE so I've got some of that education, but not Alot with disabilities.... But the importance of positive reinforcement and natural consequences, etc. I'm gonna be a total neurotic, luckily DH is a nurse and will be able to addressdome of it. And he's good at making me think logically.... :)
@anotherbee: I think DH is way more of a hypochondriac that I am so we could be in trouble, yikes!
*sigh* time is dragging....and no sign of change in my cycles. How are you doing vitafilm? what are you doing to pass the time till april?
@anotherbee: I know what you mean about time dragging on, I was doing really well because I was looking forward to starting prenatals, but the novelty wore off pretty quick. Then this cycle I got a bit nervous because I was having pretty consistent ovulation on day 15-16, but this one wasn't until day 20, I am calmer now because I think it was due to a sinus infection I had just a week before expected ovulation. So I think I am expecting a longer cycle this time around.
IN other news, DH is going to a specialist Dr. appt this morning to ask about us TTCing, he is on some pretty intense immuno-supressant drugs, and we would like to know what the Dr. has to say as some drugs for treating his condition have been linked to birth defects and some others to male infertility. Hopefully not the ones he is on, Fingers crossed! He can't really go off them, so it could be a really good day or a really hard one.
How about you? How are you passing the time? I was hoping our house reno would be in full swing and that would take up my time, but not yet. Did the Dr. give you any options to try to help your cycle, or just the good ol' wait and see?
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