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I wouldn't wear any shades of white to a wedding, just to be respectful to the bride. But I think any other colors would be fine.
I think the "not wearing white" rule is still floating around. Personally, I'd probably notice it but would be to distracted with how awesome I'd look to care! haha.
Black is now welcome at weddings. Little black dress!! Lots of brides are even doing black BM dresses.
Red was a no-no color?? Snap...that's news to me.
I have never heard the red thing. I was told a long time ago not to wear black or white. I have an invite for an upcoming wedding where we've all been encouraged to ONLY wear black and white, though, so... *shrug* different strokes, you know?
Like the pp I've mainly only heard of not wearing white or any shades of white, and I have heard from time to time that you shouldn't wear black --- the reasoning people have given me for that is that it reminds too many people of a funeral. IMO black and red are ok! As long as the black dress doesn't really look like you should be wearing it to a funeral.
I think that the rules against black and red are pretty much dead. As for white, I wouldn't have cared if anyone wore it to our wedding. (Actually, at least one person did, but he was a guy.) My view is that if we are inviting people who can't identify the brides on sight, regardless of how many people are wearing white dresses, then we should probably trim our guest list. However, I would avoid white as a guest at someone else's wedding, unless I was sure the bride was ok with it.
i've never heard of the no-red rule!
I think no white is still appropriate.
I would personally never wear black to a wedding as I consider weddings to be more colourful, however I don't think it's bad to wear it though.
I've worn black and red to weddings before, so I think that rule is dead. I even think white is okay, as long as it can't be mistaken for any type of wedding dress.
Funny, I went to a black tie evening wedding last weekend and was told by my older sister that black is a huge NO for a wedding. Shot down every black, grey or silver dress as those resemble black. Its a formal event she says, black is not ok. Fast forward, I wore an emerald green and besides the bride and MOB and MOG, everyone else was in black!!! I just laughed and said its 2010, the only color I would not wear is white.
Men wear black to everything since that is one of the few colors that tuxes and suits are available in. Yet women are shunned, ostracized, etc when they wear black to weddings, which is a double standard. At the same time, they are expected to wear black dresses to other formal events and it's perfectly ok since that's the "only" acceptable color. They are both formal occasions except that someone is getting married at one and not the other, which should not make one bit of difference. People who get bent out of shape due to the color, have either forgotten or don't care that times change and with that is fashion. The white dress for the bride is very new (at the time, black/dark wedding dresses were quite common for non-royalty and white was for royalty only when it was introduced in the Victorian era) and it went through the same social issues from being forbidden to mandatory that black dresses for women at weddings are doing today. In 10 or 20 yrs, a different color will go through the same thing. It's a never=ending cycle.
This kind of topic always makes me think of another question. If the bride is wearing a color other than white--for example, I'm wearing green--does that mean that white is okay and green is off-limits, in etiquette terms? Where does that line get drawn? I've also heard that guests are not supposed to wear something more formal than the bride's gown. If this is the case, do I automatically get veto power over anyone wearing a longer dress than mine, which is knee-length?
I'd never dream of dictating what guests can and cannot wear, because they are adults and can dress themselves--and also because I just don't care. But it's interesting to think about.
I see black and red at weddings all the time. I've worn white dresses as long as there is another color in there... Wore this to my cousin's wedding once. Sorry I'm sideways.
@noodlesploosh: That's a really cute dress, and I can't see anyone being offended by it.
I always heard no black at a wedding either, but I personally could care less if someone wore it to our wedding. I definitely think it's acceptable now.
And as others have said, NO white (or the various shades of)!
Statutory Grape - Thanks! Also recently attended a wedding where two guests showed up in this Anthro dress:
@Statutory Grape: you're wearing green to your own wedding?? do you have a pic to share, i'd love to see that! i had serious thoughts about pink or a pale blue... but in the end, caved in to the traditional.
I think white is generally considered a no-no but personally i don't mind it. My aunt wore a white mini dress to my wedding and one of my friends wore a white dress that had a colorful placed graphic image on it, and neither of these offended me. I have never heard about no black or no red, hello "the little black dress" is a classic! i did read on another thread once that someone had a woman wear a white, long, formal gown to her wedding! now THAT would be crossing the line, to wear something that could be considered bridal in the context of the wedding at hand is a major no-no. @PumpkinSpiceChai: your example of the beachy white dress is not an example of this because it was not a beach wedding, therefore that dress was ok.
@Kemi82JP: I'm having it custom-made on Etsy so it's not finished yet. :) Here's the inspiration pic and the fabric swatch she's using. I love green, and don't feel like myself in white (none of the white gowns I tried on really stood out or wowed me), so why not, right?
@Statuatory, that dress will be stunning!
@Kemi, red throughout history has been associated with love and passion, therefore is the color of choice for Asian brides, and was also the color of choice for ancient Roman brides. In modern times, in the Western world, red has been considered taboo especially at weddings because it was for such a long time the color associated with prostitutes. Nowadays, anything goes and no one connects the two at all, nor do most even know the history of it.
@Selene221: I really hope so. I am nervous, but SO excited to see it (the deadline is November 10, and she promised to start sending updates with pictures once her Halloween orders are completed, so that will hopefully be close to the middle/end of October).
I've worn white/cream to a few weddings and i've never been the only one! That could have alot to do with the company i keep though - none of the weddings i've ever been to could be classified as even remotely traditional!
Black and red are both fine to me.
I thiink in the case of white that it ultimately depends on the style of the dress--you are skirting close to the line, but I'm not going to declare the color off-limits altogether. A white sheath with unique colorful accessories could work just fine.
I think black and red are fine now. But I would never wear white to a wedding. I think you do it out of respect for the bride--people aren't going to be confused about who the bride is, it's a respect thing. Also if I knew the bride was going to be wearing a different color (like green), I wouldn't wear that color either.
@Selene221: oh interesting! nice to see someone actually knows the roots of certain traditions or superstitions.
@Statutory Grape: that will be gorgeous! you'll definitely have to post pics once your wedding is all said and done!
I'm sure white is still "taboo", but honestly, I couldn't give less of a crap what color people wear to my wedding. My dress will be green, and like someone else said, if they don't know that I'm the bride, then they probably weren't invited in the first place.
Also, I wore a white dress with pink flowers on it to my cousin's wedding last summer. No one said anything about it to me, so I'm assuming it's alright, especially if it has a print.
Depends on culture. Some cultures no black too funeralish some cultures no red. I would be upset if someone else had white on thats bout it.
Weird about the red - anyone know the logic behind this (outmoded) custom? I understand why etiquette says no white (too bridal) or black (too funereal) but red?
I personally wouldn't care if someone wore white to my wedding, but I know lots of people feel differently. The "no black" rule made me laugh, though - when my mom remarried in high school, she and I both wore black dresses! It wasn't intentional. I was her bridesmaid, and we both found dresses we loved that happened to be black. But we were so happy, no one could have mistaken it for mourning. :)
Edit: Never mind - just saw that my question was answered above!
I will never ever wear white to a wedding unless there is some theme going on and the bride wants it to be like that. I have worn black cocktail dresses to weddings and even red ones.
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When I was growing up, I was taught that it was innapropriate to wear white, black or red to a wedding. I went to a wedding this weekend and was shocked to see several guests wearing (solid) black, white or red dresses. One guest even wore a sleeveless knee length solid white dress that could easily be worn by a bride at a beach wedding. Is this considered acceptable now? Just curious for your thoughts.