Post # 1
Hi Bees – When my fiance and I got engaged, we were considering either an intimate, 25 guest “all-inclusive” package in the Napa Valley (our spot) or having a wedding in our city with around 75-100 guests. Due to the simplicty and cost for our guests we ultimately chose the wedding in our city, but now that the stress of planning is in full force I have to ask – is having a larger wedding worth it? I’m often looking back with regret wondering if having a smaller wedding that would have been planned by someone else is something that would have better suited us. Or maybe having a wedding is just stressful in itself, regardless of where it is and how many guests attend?
Post # 2
Bchicagos: It really just depends on you I guess. For me, we had 200+ guests, and I found I didn’t stress about it at all once I decided to let go and stop caring about small details. Looking back I’m glad I had the size I did. If I had had to narrow it down to 25 guests, it would have been a lot more stress and headache because of family and friends.
Sometimes destination weddings aren’t so simple. Everyone thinks the less people the easier it is, but that isn’t always the case.
Post # 3
Bchicagos: It totally depends on your financial situation and the support you have while planning.
We had a bigger budget wedding for 130 guests and I had a full-time wedding planner. With those two things in place yes I would say our larger wedding was absolutely 100% worth every moment of stress or worry. If you are restricted by cost or you will be flying solo in the planning it may not be depending on how you handle stress, how much you enjoy planning etc. Really every bride has to decide what she ultimately wants and can handle.
I think a 75-100 person wedding in the city will be very doable and not overwhelming at all! It will be lovely. 🙂
(PS hello fellow wine coutry bee!)
Post # 4
Unrelated: Moving to wine country in a few weeks, so hello to you and TreeJewel!
My FI and I were originally planning for a small wedding (under 30 people) then bumped it up to a 110ish person event. So far I definitely think bumping up the size was worth it because we can avoid the possible stress of not inviting someone and hurting feelings because we wanted a smaller event rather than just going for the larger event where everyone could feel included. In my opinion the size of the wedding doesn’t add to the stress all that much because even with a smaller event there is a lot to do and organize (invitations, linens, location, etc), and you’d be doing all that anyway whether or not your guest list was large or small.
Post # 5
funny, we’re also a wine country wedding. Ours will be 110-120 or so. The number of ppl hasn’t been stressful at all- my FPIL are stressful but that wouldn’t change even if we only had 20 ppl or eloped. It was much easier for my FI and I to feel like we’re able to invite most of the ppl who want to celebrste w us and who we want there. Too hard trimming the list down. Also, I’m pretty sure we have the makings for a rocking party which just wouldn’t happen for us w only 20 ppl there. And uh we’ll be better able to hide w our friends to avoid any relatives of his trying to be dramatic.
Post # 6
Bchicagos: Larger weddings are only worth it if that’s what you and your fiance are dreaming of. They are a lot of work, but if it’s what you both have wanted, then yes, totally worth it! 🙂 We had 150 people at our wedding, and we planned it pretty much all ourselves. It was super intense and by the end of it we were so exhausted and just relieved it was all over, but honestly, i’d never take it back! Best day ever.
Post # 7
100 people is still a fairly small wedding. There really isn’t that much more stress for a large wedding than a smaller wedding. We’re having over 300 people in a couple weeks and it hasn’t been stressful and we’ve done it all ourselves living hundreds of miles away. If you really want a smaller wedding go for it, but I don’t think there’s that much difference, you’re still planning a wedding and everything that goes along with it.
Post # 8
We have 224 invites and our planning as not been stressful at all. I thnk the stress of wedding planning is all self induced. Cant worry about things that our not in your control. We have all our vendors booked with signed contracts, invites out, decor rented and/or bought, and now for rsvp’s. We have kept our prices down which i think would have been our stress. We are so excited to have a large wedding with all the people we love!