Post # 1
Someone from FH’s family just e-mailed me to ask what people are wearing to the wedding. I didn’t indicate a dress code on the invitations but I imagined that ladies will be wearing cocktail/tea lenght dresses and that men will be wearing suits or at least a shirt and tie.
Did I mess up by not indicating a dress code???
Here is what our guests know about the wedding. We sent out nice STD cards. The invitations were pretty “formal looking” (silver pocketfolds with a dark blue layer behind the invitation, the invitations and insert cards in white linen cardstock). I did outer and inner envelopes with them. The wording was pretty formal/traditional (Mr. and Mrs. myparents request the honour of blah blah blah). The wedding starts at 3pm and both the ceremony and reception take place on a waterfront country farm.
What would you wear to the wedding if thats all you knew??
Should I be freaking out?!?!
Post # 3
not freaking out, per se, but some people will likely show up underdressed. farm says casual to me, so unless otherwise notified, i would probably not dress up. but i WOULDNT wear jeans. maybe put a note on the website or spread the word that the attire is a little more formal than ‘casual’.
Post # 4
If I were a guest at your wedding, I’d wear a tea-length dress…but maybe nice pants and a blouse depending on the season. I wouldn’t worry too much about what guests wear. Really, what can you do about it besides try to spread the word via family/friends? Are you afraid they are hearing “country farm” and assuming that it’s supposed to be casual?
Post # 5
No matter what I would never wear jeans to any wedding! What is the norm in your circle? Do people commonly wear jeans to weddings? If so then you might want to enlist family and friends to spread the word about the dress code. Otherwise I wouldn’t worry too much about it.
Post # 6
perhaps pass the word around to a few key people who can help spread your desired dress to everyone, but I doubt anyone would ever wear jeans!!
Post # 7
The only way I would wear jeans to a wedding is if the bride & groom specifically ASKED for it. That said, I was worried about this as well, and since none of our family attend a lot of weddings, and might not be sure of what to wear, I put this up on our wedding website.
“First and foremost, we want our guests to be comfortable. What we’ve written below is simply information about the kind of wedding we’re having to give an idea of what sort of attire you’d like to wear if you’re unsure.
We’re having an outdoor, afternoon wedding, which will take place on the grounds and porticoes of the mansion. If we had to pick a “dress code” for our wedding, it would have to be casual cocktail. Ladies in sundresses or cocktail dresses. For the men, ties and jackets are not required, but if you’d like to wear them, feel free. A short sleeved or dress shirt and slacks are just fine.”
Hopefully that will get the point across.
Post # 8
Hopefully no one shows up in jeans!!! I agree with an earlier post — maybe start spreading the news by word of mouth re: dress code. Or, if you have a website, that would be a great place to post! I used theknot.com’s free site, and they have a special section specifically for attire.
Post # 9
Do you have a website? If so you could indicate on the site that dress is formal of at least "semi-formal". Otherwise word of mouth is probably going to be your best bet!
Post # 10
I agree, I’d use the website to let people know the “dress code”. If not, maybe your BP and mom can pass on the information.
Post # 11
I’m going to add a little note about it on the website and ask FMIL and my Mom to spread the word. I’m pretty sure most of our guests will dress nicely, I just had a little freak out moment 🙂
I went to a wedding last year (the groom was FH’s co-worker) and some people wore jeans. It was a really casual wedding and I was embarrassingly overdressed in my cocktail dress.
Post # 12
I wouldn’t worry. It was probably very clear to everyone that our wedding would be relatively casual (rustic invites, held outdoors at a park and in a renovated barn, mentioned on our Web site to consider the weather when choosing attire and recommended comfy footwear)!
Even so, I didn’t spot a single person in jeans or shorts at the wedding. Most of the men were more dressed up than our groomsmen, who where in white dress shirts, nice khakis and ties (no jackets).
Post # 13
Well personally jeans would not bother me unless they were raggedy (is that a word?) or full of holes or something. But our wedding is semi-formal and while the majority of the guests will doubtless be in dresses/skirts/ nice pants, etc., I think I will be too busy to really care if someone is in jeans!
Post # 14
I did not indicate a dress code either. No matter what the invitatation looks like, unless it has a specific dress code I wear a nice dress/cocktail attire. I did have one or two people show up in jeans at our wedding and I knew I said Id be upset if people wore jeans but when it came down to it, I noticed it and got over it. They should be the ones that feel out of place if they wear jeans 🙂
Post # 15
Definitely spread the word about the dress code through family and friends. Most know to wear something nice to a wedding. I would guess that most would be in sundresses, or slacks and button downs. I think that most people know to dress up.
Even if someone wears jeans, I promise you will barely notice. There are so many wonderful things going on that day, and you are going to be so happy, that if a random person is wearing jeans, you probably won’t notice it until later, if at all. And no one will judge your wedding from what someone ELSE wore!!!
Post # 16
- Wedding: June 2009 - Red Fish Grill
We got the same questions. Our wedding was held on a beach. Most men wanted to know what would be appropriate in the sense of a suit and tie vs. khakis and a button-down. (It tends to be hot down here in the summer!) I wouldn’t read too much into the question. At least you’re getting them, which means your guests are conscientious enough to ask.
My main fear was that all the men would be Hawaiian shirts. Guess what, there was one… and it didn’t bother me a bit in the whole scheme of things. :o)