(Closed) Are Save the Dates REALLY necessary!?

posted 6 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
1038 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I wouldn’t send out invites superearly unless it is a destination wedding.  Chances are, people will forget about them that far in advance. 


I didn’t do STDs either, but my guestlist for my semi DW is less than 50 so we just personally called everyone.  And I emailed everyone once I got my wedding website set up.



Post # 4
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I don’t think they’re essential (I’d never heard of them until I came here – I was wondering why so many people had sexually transmitted diseases!). I wouldn’t send the invites too early – people forget about it and your plans for time, location, etc. may change if it’s too far in advance.

If you really want to get word out about it early, try calling people, or even just making an event on facebook and inviting everyone to that.

Post # 5
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I was another one trying to figure out “STD.” It’s isn’t a cute abbrv. for a wedding site! Cool

Post # 8
292 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I agree with PPs not to send out the invites too early. Word of mouth is usually enough for people that have to make travel plans. I agree that you could also make a private facebook event for the guests on fb. Have you considered postcard save the dates? That would cut postage costs. Also, not every guest needs to get a STD. I am inviting about 140ish people, but only need about half that many Save-The-Date Cards since a lot of people live together and some guests just aren’t a high enough priority to warrant a STD for me. Hope that helps a little!

Post # 9
26 posts
  • Wedding: April 2013

I think Save-The-Date Cards are more important when you have chosen prime wedding season, April should be fine. I’m in April too, no plan on Save-The-Date Cards of any kind 😉

Post # 10
124 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@HeadsGal:  I agree….I also think Save-The-Date Cards are good when you have a lot of people who would have to travel or if your wedding is on a holiday. We probably wouldn’t have sent out Save-The-Date Cards either, but our wedding is Memorial Day weekend and we were afraid a lot of people would plan vacation during that time.

Post # 11
3092 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Agree with pp about sending invites too early.  It is my plan to get our STD’s out about 6 months before the wedding.  We’re traveling and planning on a fairly small wedding so in our minds getting as much info to our guests with reminders will ensure our few seats are filled.

A very recent example is our engagement party happening this weekend.  We only sent out invites because you obvy don’t send STD’s fo e-parties.  So a bunch of our guests who RSVP’d a couple months ago DID totally forget.  We realized ths when we went out with a friend couple of ours and said something like, “So you’re still coming this weekend right?”  I immediately saw them look at eachother in terror.  Turns out they totally forgot and are having a house guest.  We resolved that and now have an extra guest for the party.  Also, as soon as we got in the car we sent a text reminder to all our yes RSVP’s to which we got all positive responses.  I honestly think most of them probably forgot.  We were actually really suprised our friend couple forgot…we’re super close with them.

Post # 12
587 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I just decided today that I wont be sending them out! You can check out the thread I started on this topic yday 🙂

Post # 13
87 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Just for the record, save the dates are NOT common around here. Maybe among the rich elite that have money to blow, but among us “normal” middle-class people that save where we can, it isn’t usually done.

Of all the weddings I have been to, none of them had save the dates, and none of them sent out early invites (they were all sent out about 3 months ahead).

We’re taking it a step further in that we aren’t even having orders of service (again something that most people skip here, especially if the chapel and reception venue are on the same property) or menus (we’re doing a buffet).

That money really adds up, and we’d rather spend it on an extra round of drinks for our guests!

Post # 14
297 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

well we ordered our Save-The-Date Cards from vistaprint. I ordered them from their “marketing” section instead of the wedding section.  we got 100 high quality postcards for about $28!  so you’d be looking at the $75 postage plus about $60 for the postcards. if i recall they give you a lower “per-postcard” rate when you order higher quantities.   we had to do Save-The-Date Cards bc we’re technically a destination wedding since non eof our guests live in FL like we do. and also our wedding is during the peak of spring break season around here so we wanted our guests to get a head start on finding their accommodations.

Post # 15
827 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

We did not send Save-The-Date Cards and we sent our invites out early- 3 months ahead. Everyone who RSVPd yes showed up, so I wouldn’t worry about people ‘forgetting’ your wedding if you send invites a little earlier than normal.

Post # 16
1114 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

We’re not sending Save-The-Date Cards – we’ve just let people know the date by word of mouth.  I think that because we’re getting married in July we’ll send the invitations out 4 months beforehand (rather than 3 months) but in April that shouldn’t be an issue.  I say just make sure you get the word out to people you absolutely want to attend, and let them know you won’t be sending Save-The-Date Cards so to pencil it in the diary now.

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