Are you a good match with your partner when it comes to spending habits?

posted 3 years ago in Money
  • poll: Which best desribes you as a couple?
    We are both more savers than spenders : (28 votes)
    36 %
    He/she is a spender, but I am a saver : (18 votes)
    23 %
    He/she is a saver, but I am a spender : (22 votes)
    28 %
    We are both more spenders than savers : (10 votes)
    13 %
  • Post # 2
    9526 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    We’re both frugal by nature. So that works well. We also both really value saving for house/retirement/vacations, so we set that up automatically in our accounting. Actually, for the last several years I’ve been trying to work on being okay with spending money on fun but non-essential things. Like going out on dates. Or getting a massage when I’m stressed out. I try to see it as an investment in our relationship or in my own mental health. 

    Post # 3
    5697 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    He is a “saver” but mostly by default cause he just doesn’t spend money on things, and I’m a spender. We don’t fight about money, he doesn’t care at all what I spend as long sa the bills are getting paid, and I do the budget.

    Post # 4
    10454 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2011

    I’m a natural saver, he’s a natural spender.  We both found a good balance before meeting each other though, and our habits are fairly similar.

    Post # 5
    8389 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I’m the saver, he’s the spender.  It works for us because he makes the money and I manage it.  I think as long as you’re honest, open and willing to compromise with your partner, different spending habits can still be very manageable.

    Post # 6
    2064 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I like to think we are both savers but we are both spenders. we just cant decide on whats worth spending  what we saved on. does that make sense. i think that maybe a ps4 is not what i would spend my money on and he prob thinks that much for eye cream is just wacko. but we totally get along and consult each other but we have had our ups and downs.

    Post # 7
    7281 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    We both lean towards saving, and we both dislike debt, so we are pretty compatible. We do encourage each other to spend on what makes us happy. I encourage him to use our money to enjoy his hobby, and he encourages me to buy that pretty new bag every once in a while. It works for us.

    Post # 8
    655 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2014 - SPRING VALLEY COUNTRY CLUB

    I am the spender, we have worked out a budget. So i am able to spend and we as couple can save as well.


    It works for us.

    Post # 9
    2894 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    Laurenplusalex:  we’re both savers, except him when it comes to his parents. They treat him like an ATM. That’s the only thing we fight about and it drives me nuts. 

    Post # 11
    2117 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    We’re both spenders – but only to the extent we can afford. I put more of a priority on saving, but that makes sense in our relationship right now, as he’s in law school full-time and can’t really save anything. We agree that once we’re both done with our graduate degrees in 2016, saving will become the #1 priority. Until then, we still like to enjoy our lives and don’t feel like we have to scrimp and live like paupers just because we’re young and working towards higher education.

    It also helps that FI will (likely) have a high-paying job after he graduates, so I’m not as stressed as I probably would be otherwise.

    Post # 12
    2878 posts
    Sugar bee

    I think we’re pretty well balanced … I can’t say we’re ”savers” yet because we’re both full-time students, and although I make a decent income thanks to my scholarship, a huge chunk of that money goes to student loans repayment, because I want to be debt-free in less than 24 months. After that, I can focus on saving a lot (I already have a few saving accounts, but they don’t add up fast). FI doesn’t have other income than his student loans, so he’s spending them carefully, because he doesn’t want to have too much debt by the end of his program either. I think our current situation prevents us from making impulsive choices when it comes to spending. 

    However, our budget still allows restaurants, cinema tickets and a few extras (fine cheeses, wine) every now and then. It makes the whole process of being budget-conscious and very self-disciplined about finances easier, because we don’t feel as though we have to deprive from everything we love (and that allows us to get a break and enjoy ourselves from time to time = a necessity for our mental health !!). We simply make choices according to our situation, keeping our goals in mind (= being debt-free ASAP, in order to start saving money ASAP). 

    Post # 13
    5194 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

    I’m the spender and he’s the saver; however, after 24 years together we’re pretty much in sync all the time.

    Post # 14
    1049 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    He is on the extreme end of a spender (will delay paying his car loan to buy a slab of beer) and I am an extreme saver (reformed spender)

    We combined finances considerably earlier than most couples I think, as we were living together and I was in charge of paying bills and getting really frustrated that he would never give me the money for his share.  When we lived with a friend, that friend paid all the bills and FI always gave him what was needed on time, but when he moved out and I took over FI would say that I had paid all the bills but he had bought dinner and stuff like that.  He honestly thought it was even, but it was far far from it.  He also constantly had to borrow money from me for things like petrol. 

    Now we have a joint account, and I move all the bill cash I need into another account and we use the joint card to buy things like petrol, groceries etc.  This usually worked fine, except I still had the problem of him spending money which was no longer bill money but was my own leisure money.  He doesn’t do it on purpose, he really doesn’t, he just has no idea how simple things like a drink from the servo every day adds up.

    We are now changing it again to each of us having our own private account, and I take the money out for bills to put into our mutual account on each payday.  I explained to him this means that if he runs out of money on his card, he has run out of money and he will need to ask me to borrow money.  He is completely fine with this.  

    I think it doesn’t matter what your spending habits are, as long as you are able to discuss and reach a compromise.  We are always respectful of each other and discuss these things openly.  He is also a good balance for me because sometimes when I’ve worked myself to the bones he says stuff the bills and will make me go out for dinner with him or something, which I would have never justified all by myself.  

    Post # 15
    1109 posts
    Bumble bee

    We’re both paranoid savers. My FI grew up very poor and I was instilled from a young age to be careful with my money so we both tend to kind of just sit on our money and really calculate if a purchase is worth it.

    However, this mindset doesn’t seem to apply to food, lol.

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