Post # 1
My Fi and I are the definition of opposites attract. We have different religious points of views; we have different backgrounds, although we both have one parent from the Caribbean who have some similarities in culture. We have different political beliefs, although we do agree on some issues, we like different football teams, we are different in terms of personalities Fi is a people person, while I wouldn’t describe myself as anti social I’m not as friendly as him. I have a nice small group of friends. I come from the east coast, his family is from south. You get the point.
We both love each other very much although we don’t have much in common. I actually think it’s positive as we have been forced to look outside of our views and see different points of view. I think we have become really good at comprise and it works for us because ultimately we love each other and want to be together and we willing to make it work, and we kind of balance each other out in a good way.
How much do you have in common with your spouse? Are you and your spouse opposites? How has your differences or similarities effected your relationship?
Post # 3
we are complete opposites. Im very much a planner, I hate surprises, im outgoing, I can be a neat freak, I am super social and enjoy being out and doing things all the time if possible, Im short, he’s tall lol, He is very artistic in that he likes playing music and music in general and art and all kinds of things of that nature, I am not, I like whatever sounds good and couldnt tell you have the names of artists he likes (they dont show up on top 40 so i dont know them lol), He is super laid back (unlike me) and loves surprises and just going with the flow, that throws me off and makes me a stress monster. Im a yeller and I tend to be a hot head and at times can be emotional, although im not a huge crier, he is usually the level headed calm one, He balances me out though. Our differences have worked in our favor I think. he has shown me a lot about the things he loves and knows a lot about and I have brought him out of his shell alot and have made him way more comfortable being in social situations. the list goes on and on but somehow we do balance each other out.
ETA: We are alike in the big things as well. We have similar morals, we agree on how we feel our child should be raised, we have similar religious beliefs, we have the same love of family etc. its mostly in our personalities and recreational interests that we are super different.
Post # 4
We’re pretty alike. We share the same political views. He’s athiest, I’m agnostic. We both like similar tv, movies, books. He likes comic books and any and all sci-fi, I like good sci-fi. 🙂 We’re not into watching sports at all, but I’m sportier than him. I would enjoy a run, hike, kayak, skiing trip more than he would. We both have a sarcastic sense of humor.
I’m more outspoken, he’s more measured. I have a temper, I rarely see his. He is way more patient than me. I’m more social, I like to keep busy. He would prefer to stay at home. I am heavily involved in theater, he’s into stand up and voiceover work.
He’s a cat person, I much prefer dogs. 🙂
Post # 5
We are very alike. We sometimes joke that if we were anymore alike we would be the same person.
Post # 6
My husband and I are very similar in the “big” things — familial and religious upbringing, political, moral, and social beliefs, etc. We have lots of interests in common, and also interests that are quite varying! We also just approach situations pretty differently sometimes. So I think that our similarities have given us a strong foundation, and our differences help us learn and grow together.
Post # 7
We are very alike which sometimes scares us lol But we do have many of our own likes.
Post # 8
We’re very similar for the most part. He’s definitely a procrastinator, and I like to have things done/be places ahead of time. That’s probably our biggest difference. I think it’s a good thing for us, because one of our similar traits is a desire to be ‘right’ and we’re both stubborn. So if we had completely opposite religious or political views, we’d probably always be debating over it!
Post # 9
We are alike in terms of values and interests. We share politics, religion and come from a similar background in terms of socioecomics and all that. We are interested in a lot of the same hobbies and activities.
In terms of our personalities, we are different. DH is very laid back, calm and fly-by-the-seat-of-his-pants. At work he is very focused, but outside of work, he just sort of drifts through life. I am a bit more high-strung, organized, a planner and am gogogo, then crash.
It seems like having the “big” things in common, but letting our personalities balance out works well for us.
Post # 10
We are also alike in the big things: moral values, religion, political views and upbringing. We also enjoy a lot of the same sports and hobbies as well.
But my DH is very calm…almost never gets stressed out, but is extremely motivated. I, on the other hand, need someone to light a fire under my butt sometimes and am the worrier of the two of us. I get stressed out about things going wrong. So I would say we’re 50/50 with that.
Post # 11
It’s a mixed bag for us. Our families growing up were very similar: stable parents, 1 other sibling, good values. His parents weren’t as supportive in school as mine were though.
He’s a mega worrier, and I’m a semi-worrier. I’m a lot more confident than he is. I like to have things planned far in advance (or at least have a plan to work from, even if it has to be adjusted later on), whereas he likes to have a plan, but doesn’t want to be responsible for making it… but he also doesn need one, whereas I get anxious if we don’t have one.
We both have a balance of introvert and extrovert, but tend toward the shy side with new people.
We have different hobbies (me- arts/crafts, him- comics and movies) but I share in his hobbies quite a bit. I’m very much into fitness and our finances and he… isn’t.
But overall, it works for us. The wedding card his parents gave us has a great quote, “It isn’t about being perfect, but being perfect for each other.”
Post # 12
Complete opposities. We are both passionate people, but we show it in different ways. I am more strong and steady. I like to express my emotions quietly with a lot of internal fire. He’s more expressive and is not afraid to show when he feels a certain way. I guess both of us are stuborn though. But again, we show it differently.
We do have a lot in common in terms of values and beliefs.
Post # 13
@hisgoosiegirl Yes, my Fi and I have heated debates over things but we don’t too worked up about it, it is more for fun.
I also like to add I do think we have the same core beliefs that are important to us, like family, we both have similar morals, so I do think things like that are important and a provided a good foundation for any relationship.
Post # 14
We’re pretty similar on the big ticket things… Political views, family values, religion, hobbies, football teams :), etc.
As far as personality, I think we’re compatible but different and a lot relates to our upbringing… his family is slightly less well-off than mine was (although he had a fairy rich aunt who was very involved), his parents have been married 25+ years and mine were angsty and are now divorced, I’m very assertive and fierce in my love but also arguments for my family, and he’s more laid back in his opinions and his expressions. We’re a balance.
Post # 15
We’re both very different and alike, so I voted other.
We have pretty much the same values and general goals, what we want out of life, etc. So we’re in the same mind set that way, and we’re often on the same wave length. But we have very different careers and interests. We’ve also got some differing opinions on other things like public policy and politics, so we have a lot to talk about. He’s very exciteable and I’m more on the calm side, so we’re complementary that way as well.
Post # 15
We are very opposite! He is 40, loves rock and roll, loves to be the center of attention and will eat ANYTHING you put in front of him. He was super popular in school and has too many friends to count.
I am 22, very quiet, laid back, hate too much attention on me, very picky eater. I was not popular in school and only have a few close friends.
We are perfect together though, we totally balance each other out!