Are you engaged yet?

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
279 posts
Helper bee

@futurejhart:  So I dated my FI for 6.75 years before we got engaged. My family is from Idaho and tends to marry young. I’m only 23 and every time I called my grandparents they said “Are you gonna marry that boy yet?” I started responding “Well you better ask him :)” and he would laugh.  When we finally got engaged (Christmas Eve) everyone was soooo happy for us. All I heard was “Congrats” “We are so happy for you” “Aw you two are so cute” (Even the people who knew us when we first starting dating) Only my mom said “Well it took you long enough” to FI as a joke after hugging and crying. (I didn’t cry until I told my dad, so it isn’t wierd if you don’t cry!”  

 

This question has been asked before, I’ve seen this rant. I felt exactly how you felt and someone else responded with exactly what I’m saying right now. I think people will be too happy for you. If they aren’t, they are jerks. Just come tell me and I’ll send you so many Congrats that you won’t know what to do with them. 🙂

Post # 4
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Healdsburg, CA

My SO and I have been together for just over 6 years. A LOT of our friends have gotten married, had kids, etc during this time, so yes, I definitely know what you are talking about. It makes me crazy when people act so shocked that we have been together for so long without getting engaged. I would consider myself as a waiting bee at this point since he is saving up for my ring right now, and I am also worried that people will have that “about time” kind of reaction when we get engaged, but I think it will just be something we will have to take in stride. Forget the rude people, and just look forward to getting engaged when YOU are ready 🙂

Post # 5
Member
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

It’s weird, I got both reactions after 2 years, 3 months of dating. Some thought it was too soon, some thought it was about time. Just goes to show that you can’t make everyone happy and it’s best to follow whatever path is best for you are your SO

Post # 7
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

That’s the most obnoxious question! If you had a choice, you’d be engaged already! They need to start bothering BFs with that question, instead!

Post # 8
Member
2851 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

FI and I dated 6 years before getting engaged. AND IT WAS ABOUT DAMN TIME! It didn’t take away from the special moment.

Post # 9
Member
1136 posts
Bumble bee

@futurejhart:  ditto! & SO got mad the other day about people judging him. He said he feels like people care more than we do….little does he know I care too!

Post # 10
Member
137 posts
Blushing bee

Girl this is all I get this past year. 9 years deep and people think they know what time is right for us! But a friend gave me some good advice she said it will never stop next it will be “when the wedding?” Then “when’s the baby?” Then “when’s the next baby” 

So screw all the comments and smile knowing you’ve a guy who loves you and the rest will come. And as for the “about times” theres always people who say dumb mean stuff for the sake of it. Ignoring them is always the funnest option! 

Post # 11
Member
564 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

@futurejhart:  

People suck sometimes.

I’ve seen other people do this to my friends in front of me, but not to me (as of yet).

Post # 13
Member
51 posts
Worker bee

@futurejhart:  You cannot control what people will say. I have a friend who will surely say “finally” or “it’s about time” because she was expecting an engagement at 6 months. By the time we are engaged this summer, it would be past her crazy timeline, but what does her timeline matter anyways? 🙂 This will still be such a special moment in your life no matter how many people try to water it down! Even though the congratulations may get lost, realize you have a ring and wedding to plan!

Post # 14
Member
592 posts
Busy bee

I get it all the time. It will die down a bit since the holidays are over. And after our anniversary passes in February no one will ask too frequently. 

Most annoying is when total strangers ask. Especially if I just called him my bf(not fiance) and there’s no ring it seems rather like a duh factor. 

Post # 15
Member
518 posts
Busy bee

This annoys me to no end. I can’t believe how many people asked after Christmas or looked at my left hand for a ring. What irritates me is I am not dying for a proposal and ring, I am perfectly happy with how things are. I am not impatiently waiting. We live together, I know we’re going to spend our lives together, why does everyone else care so much or think I am dying for a ring. I’m not, really, I’m happy, stop asking me. 

Post # 16
Member
422 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014 - Rebar

@futurejhart:  I completely understand what you are saying. I dated my FI for 10 years before i got engaged…we just got engaged 7 days ago!!! N i thought that people would say that and some did but i did not care at all. It really didnt matter bc i still fell on cloud 9 regardless of what everyone thought. I love the fact that FI took his time to propose bc it makes our story that much unique. I am marrying my best friend and that is the most important thing! I am sure you will feel like that too but i am also certain that if people start saying those things you will be over the moon that will not even notice it! good luck!

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