(Closed) Are you having your fiance’s sister(s) be a bridesmaid even if you’re not close?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

I did, and it was a huge mistake 🙂 I really like her, but she caused a ton of drama and didn’t help with anything either.

Post # 4
Member
4887 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I think I am.  FI wants me to have her, so… that’s that.  But we aren’t close at all and it’ll make for interesting pictures when I pose with my bridal party.

Post # 5
Member
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Hell no. (Though I did consider it).

Post # 6
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I wouldn’t.  If he wants her, he can have her on his side (and has, in fact, suggested that we just have our siblings up there as attendants, my sister as MOH and brother on my side, his brother as best man and sister on his side).

ETA: His sister has a job that has had her overseas the entire 3 year relationship.  I’ve only met her twice.

Post # 7
Member
2512 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I am having 2 of FI’s cousins. One of them being my MOH.

So far we haven’t had any issues, but I also haven’t asked them to help with much.

Post # 8
Member
5655 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2011

No I didn’t and I wouldn’t advise doing so unless you two are already close. That is all.

Post # 9
Member
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Yes, but I really like her. We just aren’t that tight.

Post # 10
Member
1398 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

We’re not super-close, but it’s his only sister, and I do really like her, so yes.  I would feel odd not having her in the wedding.  Plus, she’s a wedding sales coordinator for a living, so she’s a big help when it comes to opinions on all things wedding. 

Post # 11
Member
769 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

i have always thought you have your family first, so i never even considered not having my SILs as part of my bridal party. that being said, my friends are not having their SILs in their wedding party, not because they’re not close, but because they are SOO different from each other and while they are family, they would never be friends IRL. i think that the other part of it is that the SILs don’t expect to be part of it and don’t feel slighted that they aren’t bridal party members. it would be more hassle to have them in it than not, where as in my situation, my SILs would have blown a gasket if not included, but otherwise provided little to no drama…

 

Post # 12
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

My FSIL is 21 and I’m 26 so we are fairly close in age. I asked her to be a BM because I don’t have a sister and we get along pretty well. Since FI and I got engaged FSIL and I talk way more and she is super helpful with the planning. I’m glad that I asked her but I think I also lucked out by getting her as a sis!

Post # 13
Member
1928 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

After having to hold off my engagement 6 months and then hold off my wedding a year just to keep her from having a bridezilla moment (excuse me for saying this) but she can suck it if she wants to be a bridesmaid.

We may have her as an usherette just to shut up FMIL.

Post # 14
Member
1679 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Along those lines, what if there are TWO sisters?  I’m friendly with both.  One is older than FI (she’s in her mid-40s, married with 2 kids).  The other is about my age, is divorced, and has a son.

 

I kind of think it’d be fun to have the younger sister, but I don’t think I want to have the older sister.  Do you all think that’s okay?

Post # 15
Member
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

To make it interesting, I’m having his sister but not my own.

My sister and I just aren’t that tight. And i can’t count on her to be level headed at all.

FI and his sister are SUPER close and I can’t imagine her not being involved…and she’s very low key.

And I’m an easy going bride so there’s not really much i “expect” from the BMs except for them to show up looking pretty!

Post # 16
Member
1205 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I did/am (I invited her, and will be having her in the wedding…sorry for tense confusion!)

Family is a non-negotiable for both me and Peanut.  Even though he’s not really close with his sister, and FSIL and I don’t especially get along, she will be in the wedding.  It was really important for both of us to present a united front on the “family is a priority” issue. 

My brother is also one of the GMs even though he and FI don’t know each other well (although my brother and I were pretty close growing up and still are close, even though we don’t see each other or talk very often…I think we both know that if the other one ever needed anything, we’re here for each other).

Family is family.

The topic ‘Are you having your fiance’s sister(s) be a bridesmaid even if you’re not close?’ is closed to new replies.

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