Are you inviting your officiant to the rehearsal dinner?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
2980 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas

Nah

Post # 4
Member
5664 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Probably not in that situation. We invited our officiant and her husband. She did come. She also stayed for dinner at the wedding. She was very very nice to me throughout the planning process, and wasn’t a church  member or anything, just an officiant in the area. 

Post # 5
Member
521 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think you should ask. My photographer has requested that she attend so that she can meet the wedding party and speak to them… for her she has some points she wants to make sure they understand and that everyone is on the same page for the picture process. Perhaps your officiant might want to make a request or points for the wedding party before the actual time. He may just have pointers like “make sure you don’t do this” that would be helpful to hear before time.

I wouldn’t just send an invitation to it as he may feel pressured to attend but instead to just call him up and ask him if he had anything to cover at the rehearsal.

Post # 6
Member
1649 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2000

I invited mine because he was at the ceremony rehearsal (dinner was right after).  I think you should at least invite him.  It might be a good chance for him to get to know you guys as a couple so he can personalize your ceremony.  It might make the difference between your typical normal/generic ceremony to something really special. Everyone raved about ours.  I think it was because our officiant got to know us and didn’t just ‘show up’

 

 

 

Post # 7
Member
920 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Our officiant is a very good friend, so yes, he will be invited. But I think if its a hired officiant, they are sort of treated like any other vendor so they wouldn’t be included

Post # 8
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Our vicar travelled quite a long way for our wedding and so we put him up in a hotel for 2 nights. We had a bbq at home after the rehearsal and he came to that and to the wedding reception. We also invited his wife who we didn’t know so well but she didn’t come.

Post # 9
Member
7908 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

Yes, you should. Everyone who participates in the ceremony at the rehearsal should be invited to the rehearsal dinner. He will probably decline. Both times I got married the officiant declined for the rehearsal dinner and the wedding even though I knew the second one pretty well.

Post # 10
Member
2992 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Can you give a little more information about how you picked this church/officient?  Is it a family member’s church, or is it just somewhere that is beautiful for your wedding?

In my case, we have two officents.  My uncle, who will be invited, and a second priest who is the pastor at the church we are getting married in.  Even tough we don’t know the second pastor well, it’s my parent’s church and the one I grew up in, so we are inviting him. 

If it was a church I had no association with other than where I was getting married, I would probably not invite them. 

Post # 11
Member
11169 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

We invited our officiant and his wife, as well as all of our musicians and singers and their spouses (if applicable), to our rehearsal dinner.

Also, my DH is a pastor, and we are almost always invited to couples’ rehearsal dinners.

Post # 12
Member
958 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@kat912:  We did.  She is just a local officiant, not someone we knew prior to this process.  However, she lives 45 minutes from the venue where we get to have the rehearsal and dinner is immediately following.  So I figured it would be polite to extend the invitation.  Don’t know at this point if she is planning to join us.

Post # 13
Member
3260 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

We didn’t, and it isn’t customary for Catholic ceremonies.

Post # 14
Member
7055 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

We did. I think even if we aren’t course we would have invited him as he was a part of the rehearsal.

Post # 15
Member
1063 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@kat912:  i am not inviting her.  she is not my friend, she works for me. 

Post # 16
Member
7656 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@kat912:  We invited ours becuase she was at the rehearsal. We also thought it was polite to extend an invitation for dinner.

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