Are you more interested in marriage or the wedding?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Where do you land on this?
    Wedding : (13 votes)
    7 %
    Marriage : (172 votes)
    93 %
  • Post # 3
    6166 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    i am excited for my wedding day but it is just the doorway into the next chapter in my life.

    Post # 4
    9412 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    @thumpurr:  I only care about the marriage if that counts.

    Post # 5
    1896 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I think this site gives a skewed perspective on what we all care about.  Yes, there are people who come here to talk about their marriage and the forever aspect…. But for people like me, I don’t want to know what a bunch of internet strangers think about my relationship…. HOWEVER,  I do want to know what their experience was with timeline planning,  DIY projects, etc etc for the wedding.


    That said, I’m sure there’s a good deal of ladies on here that DO care more about the diamond and the wedding than the reality of life long partnership…. but I still think the majority may just be using this as wedding planning support and keeping the personal stuff personal.  

    Post # 6
    1771 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Marriage. Screw the wedding, it sucks and is a huge source of unnecessary stress. I’m excited about spending all the days of my life with my FI. That’s what I’m really looking forward to.

    Post # 7
    670 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    I am SO excited for my wedding day – which is great because up until a month ago I was dreading it – not the marriage part, just the whole “Pageantry” of the Wedding. I never was the kind of girl who dreamt of her wedding or cared for such things. Despite being into fashion or makeup, etc. I have always been a huge tomboy. I prefer to spend my days in the woods hiking or horseback riding, or even bow hunting or fishing with FI. But now that the day to “Seal the Deal” is only 12 DAYS AWAY!! and I get to marry my best friend I just can’t seem to contain myself. I feel so silly, lol, but I love it.

    I just had my last of 3 showers (thank GOD those are over!!) and at the end of it my FBIL’s GF asked me if I could do it over would I “Take the Check and Run” and not have the big wedding. I thought about it and really honestly I told her I would not. To start off I never wanted the large wedding – I have spoken on The Bee in the past about that so there are some here who are familiar with my background. But honestly? I Love what this whole planning process has done for both FI and myself. It has been such a challenge, dealing with personalities and family members, and even compromising with each other. It has been such a bonding experience for our families and friends and I just love that.

    In the end, my marriage to my soon to be Husband takes precedence over the wedding, absolutely, but this who thing through all its trials and compromises has been such a blessing. What I regret most is the monetary expense but we are blessed in that we can make it work.


    Post # 8
    2562 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    Put a poll on here and I’ll vote “marriage” all the way!
    I’m so excited to grow in love and life together.

    On the other hand, I’ve discovered that I can’t really stand wedding planning, haha!
    I am looking forward to when the wedding itself is all over, though I am sure that once our wedding day rolls around I’ll be saying the exact opposite. 😛

    Post # 9
    8388 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    @thumpurr:  To be honest, I wasn’t really interested in either until I met my husband.  While I enjoyed planning my wedding (I love DIY lol), I was definitely looking forward to the days after my wedding.

    Post # 10
    852 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I am so over the wedding. But very excited about marriage.

    Post # 11
    5460 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    While weddings are pretty and exciting, there would be no wedding if it weren’t for the marriage.  Weddings are nothing more than a way to celebrate a new marriage.  A wedding is just a day, a marriage is/should be forever 🙂

    Post # 13
    7997 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2013

    Definitely the marriage. I wanted to elope, and even the tiny ceremony we’re doing in December is stressing me out already!! Honestly I wish we could just go to a registry office and sign paperwork or something and not do the whole production. In my province it’s hard to elope!!

    Post # 14
    402 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    @thumpurr:  Of course I’m excited for my wedding, but it feels surreal.  I have no problem envisioning myself as a wife… seeing myself as a BRIDE is an entirely different story.  I have always wanted to find the right man and get married, start a family, etc.  But I was never a little girl who played “wedding” or “bride” or anything like that. 

    I look forward to my wedding, I’m sure it’s going to be a blast and memorable and a beautiful day, but I really just can’t wait until my FI is my husband.

    Post # 15
    896 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2009

    I was never big into wedding planning.  Never visited any wedding websites, and despite being engaged for 9 months I only started planning two months before.  I had no input in my engagement ring, never discussed a timeline; budget came before anything else.  From the moment we got engaged, we were instead focused on what type of property we would be able to afford in order to live together, how were we going to work things out so that I could go to law school fulltime.  It was all about the marriage for us, and it still is. 


    Post # 16
    117 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014


    in all honesty i wanted to elope and just be his wife already. he told me i would regret it. plus he loves a big party! 

    i think a lot of people, in the process, forget what the end goal is; and they allow all these social standards and what their friends think, to get into way.

    slash- i’m a huge extrovert, im also TERRIFIED of walking down an aisle with all eyes on me. it seems like such an intimate moment.

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