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Are you paying for your GM's clothes?

posted 1 year ago in Grooms/men
  • poll: Are you paying for your GM's Clothes?
    We are renting all of the tuxes for the dudes. : (2 votes)
    6 %
    They need to buy/provide their own clothes/suits for the wedding. : (12 votes)
    38 %
    We are buying special shirts, but they provide the pants (or visa versa). : (3 votes)
    9 %
    We are getting them a special accessory (tie/socks, etc) but they take care of everything else. : (15 votes)
    47 %
  •  
    1.
    Member
    570 posts
    Busy bee
    Rock Hugger    June 2, 2012   Virginia\FL Keys

    So this stems from a conversation I recently had with my FMIL....of course.....  We are having a Keys wedding and the GMs are going to wear khaki's, a Tommy Bahama-type Hawaiian shirt (that FI and I pick out), and men's nicer flip-flops.  We were planning on the boys just buying their own shirts and providing/buying their own pants.   The BM's are buying their own dresses, so it makes sense to me that the boys would do the same, right?  

    FMIL seems to think that we should buy the shirts for the GM.  Aside from the fact that we don't have the $$ in our budget to buy each dude his shirt, why should we?  Is this the etiquette?

    On a side note, I personally think FMIL "mothers" her two youngest sons a little too much (2 of our GMs - both are gainfully employed and not living at home).  I think she is thinking that she will need to buy her 2 sons shirts for them.  And if they were young guys at home, I would be sympathetic towards FMIL's extra expense and try to work something out with here.  But each FBIL earns more than FI and I make combined....so they are not hurting for money and can certainly afford the attire.  Not to mention they have not once complained about any wedding cost.  Sorry - this kinda turned into a vent.

    But, back to the issue, I am curious to see what other bee's are doing about their dudes!

     
    2.
    Member
    1,695 posts
    Bumble bee
    Donnica22    August 27, 2011   Marietta, GA

    Our ties just came in today! Fi just sent me a pic of them! :)

     
    3.
    Member
    3,852 posts
    Honey bee
    kala_way    May 28, 2011   Manhattan Beach, CA

    We're providing vests and ties. They are buying their own pants and shirts.

     
    4.
    Member
    190 posts
    Blushing bee
    kankanwed    May 27, 2011   DW Italy

    They buy the suits, we are gifting the ties.

     
    5.
    Member
    408 posts
    Helper bee
    SuperBrook    5/7/2011   Kansas

    They are paying the rental fee for their suits.  The guys all went together to pick the suits and the GM's and ushers will pay the rental fee on their own.

     
    6.
    Member
    8,906 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    Mrs.KMM    July 17, 2010   Atlanta, GA (wedding in Indianapolis, IN)

    Our GM paid for their tux rental which comes with absolutely everything they would need.

    I see it as the exact same thing as BMs paying for their dresses so I don't see why your FMIL thinks that you should pay for the guys (the guys typically end up having to spend less than the girls anyway!).

     
    7.
    Member
    570 posts
    Busy bee
    Rock Hugger    June 2, 2012   Virginia\FL Keys

    Oh good!  I am so glad I am not the only one who feels this way!

     
    8.
    Member
    8,947 posts
    Buzzing
    Beekeeper
    bells    June 26, 2011  

    our GMs are paying $100 for tux rental

     
    9.
    Member
    5,969 posts
    Bee Keeper
    AmeliaBedelia    March 3, 2012   Georgia

    Uh, no. You're right in that the BMs are paying, why shouldn't the GMs? That's a silly concept to me. We might pay for a tie or other accessory, but when they agreed to be in it they agreed to some sort of cost, JUST like the BMs.

    It sounds like she's just wanting to coddle "the boys." Whatever. But no. Lol

     
    10.
    Member
    6,023 posts
    Bee Keeper
    jo.lee    September 10, 2011   Indianapolis

    The guys are renting their own tuxes that FI picked out. I see it the same as BMs, too.

     
    11.
    Member
    836 posts
    Busy bee
    7-9-11bride    July 9, 2011  

    FFIL is renting tuxes for all the guys. He did this for FBIL wedding so he felt it was only fair. I feel bad for my BMs because FI and I cannot afford to buy their dresses. I don't think it's really fair.

     
    12.
    Member
    399 posts
    Helper bee
    Mochacoca    April 16, 2011   Washington, DC/Sonoma, CA

    We bought the suits for the guys.

     
    13.
    Member Icon
    Member
    1,294 posts
    Bumble bee
    NotYourTypicalBride    December 3, 2010   South Florida/Semi-destination wedding in Key Largo

    The only reason we paid for the BM's shirt and pants is because he is a 19-year-old college student (he's my husband's cousin). The other two "GMs" were my young nephews, and my sister paid for their outfits. I think it's perfectly reasonable for you to expect grown men with jobs to pay for their clothing, especially when they can be worn again.

     
    14.
    Member
    248 posts
    Helper bee
    H216scrf    November 11, 2011  

    We're getting the ties for our GM, but only because I wanted to be sure we had ties that matched the bridesmaid dresses. 

     
    15.
    Member
    202 posts
    Helper bee
    Drums    November 7, 2011  

    Our guys will be wearing their own white shirts and black suits. FH and I just decided two days ago that we would get their ties - otherwise, the consensus all along has been that that they would get everything on their own, and no one has made a peep :)

     

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