Post # 1
I’ve seen people say it here many times: “You’re having a ‘wedding’ but you’re already married? That’s just a Pretty Princess Day.”
My point is NOT whether it’s a wedding or a vow renewal or whatever. (There are enough threads on that topic!) My question is: why do we apply the term “Pretty Princess Day” pajoritively to many of these situations….aren’t most people’s traditional weddings a Pretty Princess Day in just the same way?
Post # 2
I think most “traditional weddings” are based on two families supporting, two people joining together in marriage/becoming family. Just because two people want to look good in front of everyone they know, who will be watching them make a life long commitment, doesn’t change what the purpose of the day is (IMO: it doesn’t make it a pretty princess day).
Post # 3
cbgg: Do you mean pejoratively?
I guess it depends on what meaning you give to the phrase “Pretty Princess Day”. My understanding is that it is applied to brides who go all out when they are already married, BUT don’t tell anyone.
Many couples marry in a private ceremony for all sorts of reasons, then have a reception at some later time.
So, no, I don’t think it applies to all weddings.
Post # 4
Yes definitely. But the traditional wedding just has the backbone of Pretty Princess with Purpose with the extra spiritual/social/emotional gravitas/legality etc etc.
but you could also go to the courthouse in sweats and be just as married! So YES the omg so beautiful angelic pure pretty pretty Princess mythology is strong in our culture and really every one I can think of so- there must be something to it. that’s what I think the brides subconsciously are defending when using PPD as an insult. The Sanctity and Importance of The(ir) Bride Image
Post # 5
I havent heard that term since I was a little girl and played the game. Nobody around me says that so I don’t know.
Post # 6
julies1949: Yes, sorry I did mean “pejoratively” (no spell check on my browser…not that I should make that excuse!).
Post # 7
- Wedding: A very pretty church.
cbgg: Of course most aspects of a wedding are unnecessary to achieving a ‘marriage’, however many of them are considered socially or culturally necessary.
Eg. You are creating or making official the union of two people and the joining of two families. For this reason generally it is expected that you will invite family members. If you invite people to an event it is usual to cater for them, therefore generally refreshment of some kind is expected.
In most cultures it is however also expected that this event only happens once. ‘You get one day’ and if not, you get a few days…then it is over. I suspect that this is where the controversy of vowal renewals comes from.
Essentially though everything additional to making the marriage official in the eyes of the couple, their respective families and the state is unnecessary.
Post # 9
I would also like to note I have NEVER heard this in actual life- just the deep wedding interwebz
Post # 10
cbgg: No. Most weddings are a bride and groom coming together to celebrate their love, with family and friends. Most weddings I have been to have been just as much about the groom. Just because the bride like to wear a special dress and be beautiful, doesn’t mean it’s a pretty princess day.
Post # 11
doeydo: Unnecessary. Why do you think it’s appropriate to be rude?
To all those who didnt’ choose to be insulting –
Based on some of these responses I’m wondering if I misunderstand what peopel mean when they say Pretty Princess Day? I take it as, “eye roll, you just want to be a princess for a day with all the fancy trimming,” which seems hyprocritical to me, since I think most of us accept that a traditional wedding includes spending thousands of dollars on an evening gown, hair and make up, a glamorous photographer, etc. All of those things are fun (I did them myself!) but are a completely unnecesary part of either 1) getting married, or 2) hosting guests.
Is this not what others think it means?
Post # 12
- Wedding: November 2014 - Historic cinema
Totally! My wedding day is totally an opportunity to be a pretty princess for the day! And I don’t care! I know it’s used as an insult on these boards but it doesn’t have to be a negative term at all.
In fact, I am literally going for a pretty princess look:
Audrey Hepburn as Princess Anne in Roman Holiday. Am recreating her look 🙂
Post # 13
I think it completely depends on the bride. I don’t consider OUR wedding day “my day.” It annoys me when brides treat it like that. I see so many weddings with really girly themes, and I can’t help but wonder if the groom had any say in it.
It’s fine if you want to look beautiful and yes it’s the best opportunity to get all dressed up and pampered. If that’s what you mean by pretty princess day, I guess I agree.
Post # 14
- Wedding: A very pretty church.
cbgg: Certainly it is pejorative, but then we can all be hypocritical. It’s also a matter of degrees depending on where you are from. One person’s ‘ridiculously extravagant 1 carat solitaire’ is another’s ‘OMG he doesn’t love you enough to get you a big diamond’ etc. It depends on cultural and regional norms and values. I remember watching a SYTTD special where the wedding cost hundreds of thousands (US) and the bridesmaids were still expected to buy their own very expensive dresses. I can’t help but feel that where a huge amount is spent on the couple compared to the bridal party and guests it’s a PPD in just about any culture.
Post # 15
Everyone deserves at least 1 ‘Pretty Princess Day’ in their lifetime!