(Closed) Arg, invite wording!!! What do you think? (mockup)

posted 8 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
Member
2538 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I love it. As for what to put on the insert. I’m blank. I didn’t really do that.

Post # 4
Member
1675 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Cute invites!

There’s something about “Eat, drink and merriment” that sounds awkward to me. Can you say, “Dinner, drinks and merriment” or “Hors d”Oeuvres, drinks and merriment” or something other than “eat”?

I would also get rid of the colon at the end of “to celebrate the wedding of:”

One other small thing: when you say “Because you have shared in our lives…” do you mean your parents lives? Because that is what’s implied by the next few lines where the parents do the inviting (If it were a normal, non-wedding invitation sentence it would read, “Because you have shared in our lives with friendship and love, we [your parents] request the pleasure of your company…”). If the “our” is meant to refer to you and your fiance, then the inviting line should probably be changed to “Together with our families.” Does that make sense?

Post # 6
Member
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I like it, but:

  • What do you mean by “formal adult ceremony and reception”? If you mean black tie, or dressed up, I think the invitation is a little too cutesy for black tie. If you just mean that it’s adult-only, no children, I think that it works all right.
  • I would probably change it to: “To celebrate the marriage of”. For some reason, “to celebrate the wedding of” sounds a little weird to me.
  • I agree too about the “because you have shared in our lives, Mr & Mrs. .. invite you to”

Post # 7
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think you could add a small line at the bottom for the wedding website if you don’t want to do an extra card. Or just pass out the website by word of mouth if you can? I love the invites the way they are.

Post # 9
Member
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Perhaps something like this:

Because of your friendship, support, 

and love over the years

Mr. & Mrs. ABC

&

Mr. & Mrs. XYZ

Request the pleasure of your company

to celebrate the union of their children:

 

Post # 10
Member
433 posts
Helper bee

Maybe you could just say “because you shared your friendship and love” or something similar to avoid mentioning “our”. I agree that the hosts are the speaking voice and “our” would refer to them.

I also don’t like “eat” as a noun.. you might want to say “Dinner, drink, & merriment”, “dinner and dancing” or “eat drink and be merry”.

Also, I really like the colors! are you going to keep the blue down the bottom? I think it really helps with balancing the blue heart up top without havign to use blue font which could be hard to read.

Post # 12
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

What about “Black-tie Adult Only Ceremony and Reception” instead of “Formal adult….”. That way people will know it’s formal and that kids aren’t allowed.

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