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I think your marriage will inevitably end in divorce because of how it began.
No JK, what an idiot article. And also, like you said, she may be a bit biased lol
I am really considering a courthouse wedding now myself just because I dont think I can handle the stress lol
@HoneyBear: I saw some bogus statistic that said that 80% of marriages that begin at the courthouse also end at the courthouse. Whaaaat? Lol. If you feel like your wedding is drab and depressing because of where you're getting married, you have other problems, imo.
Utter ridiculousness. I have to wonder why people bother writing articles like this. She must secretly be in the wedding planning business, or something. The success of your marriage has nothing to do with the setting of your wedding!
No way. I have at least two friends who had courthouse weddings (both also had either a reception or a religious ceremony/reception months later) and they seem to be doing all right. ;) That's just the wedding-industrial complex trying to snare your money.
@stillme: Oh, her byline at the bottom says she's a wedding officiant, so she is blatantly in the wedding industry!
@Statutory Grape: I saw some bogus statistic that said that 80% of marriages that begin at the courthouse also end at the courthouse.
Don't all couples have to go to the courthouse to get a marriage license? And all marriages that end (not all married couples) will go to court to get a divorce.
If you are going to the courthosue because it's the only way you could force your SO who does't want to get married to do it, yeah, you might have problems. But if you are making an informed decision to get married, I would think you'd have the same chances for sucess that anyone else does. Maybe even better chances because you didn't blow thousands of dollars on a wedding. Court house weddings can be very beautiful and meaningful if you want them to be.
@mrstilly: That's my take on it--we decided to scrimp on the actual wedding because marriage is more important to us--and we want to throw a hell of a party on our original date next year for all our friends and family. Why do we need to spend so much just because it's a wedding, right?
@Statutory Grape: EXACTLY! That's how DH and I felt. We didn't go to the courthouse because our parents would be upset, but went outside the box and stuck to a small budget!
Another pet-peeve of mine is how now everyone's asking when we're having the "real" wedding. Excuse me, but when we are legally married, that is our wedding. Not having a poofy gown and attendants doesn't make it any less "real." Grr.
@Statutory Grape: lol. well no matter where the marriage starts, if there is a divorce, it is at the courthouse
so that means 100% of divorces that start in the courthouse end there, too (i mean, maybe in the building, not the same room, but whatever)
but also 100% of the other divorces end there too
what a biased and bizarre article!
@Statutory Grape My unsolicited opinion is that you should treat your wedding next year like a wedding. Lots and lots of people have courthouse "legal" weddings first and then a ceremony and reception later (in fact, I think this might be the norm in Europe.)
Just register for and party it on up next year. I notice that you have a lot of posts about what the right thing to do is. The short answer is that there is no right thing to do. But if you want to celebrate your wedding/marriage next year that's fine! People understand and expect that...doesn't take away from the marriage no matter how you do it.
We're celebrating and having a registry, but it's not really a wedding if that makes any sense. The registry is there if people want to give gifts, but I'm not having a shower or publicizing it, haha.
I think that if you want a courthouse wedding, then more power to you. Just the same as with non courthouse weddings, every one is a bit different.
I was contacted by a bride a couple of months ago who asked me if I would shoot her courthouse wedding and I agreed excitedly. I'd never done one before, but it ended up being just beautiful.
We still did a first look, it was just on the courthouse steps. I don't know how they arranged it, but they got married after hours at 5:30 and we had the courthouse completely to ourselves. They chose exactly where they wanted to get married in the building and the judge performed a beautiful ceremony. There was even a time for everyone to bow their heads and pray afterwards, which I thought made it seem less institutional/govermentlike than usual.
After the ceremony the bride and groom and their families went out to dinner at a very nice restaurant and had a private dining room. The bride had a bouquet, the groom had his boutonniere and the moms both had wrist corsages.
It was as "weddinglike" as any other wedding I've ever been to, and it was perfect.
If you're interested, you can see pictures of their wedding here.
Do what suits YOU, and screw everyone else :)
That has to be the silliest article I've ever read.
I was married at city hall. Not a courthouse, but similar. It was not at all like the article described. We scheduled a date and time about two weeks in advance. There were no metal detectors, no inmates, nothing unpleasant. The mayor met us in his office right at the scheduled time. He was very pleasant and cordial and told us that performing marriages was his favorite part of his job. He greeted all of the family members that came with us and posed for pictures. While walking out of the building, we were stopped in the halls several times by people telling us congratulations. The cost? $0. He told us that as a public servant he isn't allowed to accept a "gift" for his services, even though we tried.
We actually ran into the mayor later that evening at a festival and he made it a point to come over and tell us congrats again. All in all, it was a very nice experience.
My parents were married at church....they are still married 38 years later
My FIs parents were married at the courthouse....they have been married for 43 years (until FIs mom passed away earlier this year)
It's not the location...it's the committment.
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I found this interesting, not just because of the negativity toward courthouse weddings but also because the woman who wrote it has her own business officiating weddings. Yeah, that article is not biased at all. LOL.
http://ezinearticles.com/?Dont-Even-think-About-a-Courthouse-Wedding&id=2428457
What do you think? Will our wedding be "drab and depressing" just because we decided to save a few hundred bucks by just doing a courthouse quickie? Will our marriage inevitably end in divorce because of how it began?
SMH!