- 6 years ago
- Wedding: April 2012
Sorry, this is a bit long, but I just wanted to put this out there. This is by no means a blanket statement for all situations where you want/need to ask a bridesmaid to step down. Just sharing my own experience.
I read a lot of threads on here about how dropping a bridemaid is a friendship ending move. I can tell you that it was’t for me, and that I was the bridemaid that was asked to step down. Let me explain.
My friend and I were high school friends. We stayed in touch when while we went to separate universities, and towards the end of my last year of uni, she asked me to be a bridesmaid. I said yes. She ended up having a really long engagement (a few years) at which time I moved out of town (about an hour away) for work. We kept in touch here and there, and met up face-to-face rarely. When they finally set a date and started planning, she had become close to another girl that she worked with. I’m not sure whether she had any anxiety of asking me to step down (I hope not!), but I got a phone call from her explaining how we haven’t really been close in years, and that she wanted this other girl to be in her party. I agreed and told her that she should have someone that is close to her now standing up with her.
How can I say that we’re still friends? We still send a message now and again to each other, and try to get together once in a while. And she’s coming to my wedding later this year, almost 8 years after hers.
The moral of the story is: you can ask someone to step down, and still have a friendship with them after.