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It's a relative! By all means ask. I would give a gift in exchange for the help.
if its a relative, i dont think its a problem either. i am having a super small wedding - 15 guests. i was thinking to asking my really close guy friend to hand out programs at the ceremony on the beach. i am afraid to leave them on the chairs and they will blow away in the wind! .... i guess i could ask him to be an usher?
I wouldn't care to ask a relative to help, I'm sure they would be willing.
I have helped at the last few family weddings I have been too and was thrilled to be asked . Go ahead and ask.
I've helped with other weddings in my family (mainly set-up and take-down) and I will be for sure asking for help for my wedding from them! The important thing is to pick the right person to be in charge (for set-up) and make sure that they understand exactly how you would like things to look!
Ask! My mom and aunt decorated the arbor and aisle for my wedding. My uncle filmed during the day for us. (My mom's cousin almost did my hair -- I wish she had; it probably would have looked even better and would have saved me some $$$). I think they all actually really liked to be included -- it makes for a festive, community atmosphere.
But, when you do ask people to help, be sure to give good, clear (written) instructions (or even pictures of how you want the tables set up). It actually makes the job much easier to them (and -- bonus for you -- they won't be bothering you with questions!). And a nice bottle of wine and a heart-felt thank you note doesn't hurt, either.
I have never minded being asked to do something to help out. That's what friends and family are for.
I had family members offer to help the day of, and I took them up on that. I'm sure they'd be happy to help you out on your wedding day!
I agree - if you have a relationship like that, I don't see a reason to not ask. I'm actually having my brother and his gf help with set up. He's not in the wedding party - so I asked and he said sure! I'm going to make it really clear for him (like putting all the materials for each table in a separate box, clearly labeled, diagram if necessary, etc).
Ask. It's flattering. But you should give the person some direction and express your opinion for your vision. The caterer will charge.
I would start collecting some ideas before you ask her, as either way you will have to share that concept with whomever does it.
Keep it simple, doable, manageable, in season requests. Best of luck.
@bliss989: I don't think that it would be tacky, but you might be able to ask your caterer.
I work for a catering company on the side and we do all of the set up at almost all events - from tables and linens, to hanging lights, to setting up center pieces to favors and everything in between. It might be worth checking into, just so it is one less thing that you would have to worry about. If they say no, and they only serve the food I think asking your guest isn't tacky at all. They may feel important and more a part of the day.
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I'm planning an outdoor reception at a family member's farm. It will be a small wedding reception with 50 guests. I'm trying to save some money by making the table decorations myself. However, I don't have a wedding planner and I don't think the caterer helps in decorating/setting the tables. Is it tacky for me to ask one of my relatives who is also attending the wedding? Can the caterer do this?