Post # 1
My wedding is in six weeks and, the truth is, we probably got a venue bigger than we needed. We loved the place and, since we both have enormous families, we expected to fill it. Sadly, on both sides of our families, serious life issues have struck unexpectedly. As a result, over 20 people who were “absolutely coming”, now aren’t.
While we will miss our family members terribly, we do still want to have a blow out party and we’d love to fill those seats. I am new to the city we live in, so I don’t yet have a ton of close friends yet to invite. However, I feel like I’m meeting the most amazing people, and I’d love to invite them to our wedding.
The thing is, I tend to be a “tight knit” type of friend, so it feels weird to me to invite these people, though I’d love for them to be there. Also, they *have* to suspect that they are filling the seats of others, since it’s a destination wedding and it’s only six weeks away.
I don’t want to come off as overbearing to my new friends, and I also don’t want them to feel weird that this person they have only known for a few months is suddenly asking them to fly across the country to be at their party. But, the truth is, these people are really awesome and I would love for them to be there. As a side note, I work with most of these people; they’re friends through a new job, if that changes your perspective any.
Post # 3
Social etiquette is such that you shouldn’t mix work with your personal life (for countless good reasons… as it can make for awkward situations down the road in your work life / career)
It is early days yet in your friendship, so difficult to truly know who will stand the test of time… and trust to share info with and truly accept you (and your family) for who they are without judgement etc (what a REAL Friend is).
So if there is one or two of YOUR PEERS (not anyone more senior to your position) that you are particularly close to who might fit that definition, then you could perhaps extend an Invite (realizing that it is a Destination Wedding across the country, so the likelihood of anyone making that sort of investment in attending will be minimal… particularly so this late in the game)
Just remember that Office Gossips need not apply
Hope this helps,
PS… If you don’t want them to be considered an obvious “after thought” it would be best to do the inviting in person… as a GF (out to coffee) saying that you really appreciate the friendship you are forming… and although you didn’t know them very long awhile ago, when you were organizing your Guest List, you do appreciate them now, and realize it might be short notice, but you’d like them to know that you’d really like them there if they can make it (then hand them the printed Invite… minus the RSVP card with the Reply Date on it, if the date has already passed). As you have asked in person, their RSVP should come in a similar format… something equally as casual… over coffee, by phone or email.
Post # 4
@This Time Round: I agree with your comment about “when we were putting the list together…” Maybe you didn’t even KNOW them then. I don’t think anyone will be offended.