Post # 1
My grandma’s church is very important to her. The church she is involved with is a non-traditional, non-denomonational church. My fiance and I are not religious at all. I have gone to church with her a few times simply because I know it is important to her.
Even though we are not very religious, I asked my grandma if one of the Pastors/Ministers would possibly be able to do our wedding ceremony. She knows a lot of them very well, and I thought this would be a lot more special than just hiring someone to do our ceremony. One of the Pastors agreed, and we met him very briefly Sunday and he seems awesome! He will be contacting us to set up a meeting to start getting details together.
I am a little nervous. I don’t want to offend him by requesting that our ceremony be less-traditional and less-religious than what he is maybe used to. I definitely wouldn’t mind a prayer or short sermon about marriage during our ceremony, but I don’t want that to be the main portion of it.
Anyone have ideas or advice on how we should work with him on this? Anyone else ever had a religious leader perform a cermony that really wasn’t based around religion?
Post # 2
highschoolhoneys: Hi I had a non denominational wedding because I am catholic and hubby is Jewish so as not to delve deep into either religions I wrote the entire ceremony word for word and gave it to the pastor, I timed it and put in where to pause for music when to do unity candle and break the glass, the pastor maybe adlibed a few words but otherwise it was perfect and exactly what we wanted. I would just be upfront and tell the pastor exactly what you want
Post # 3
I know there are a lot of Rabbis who will act as a “spiritual leader” or chaplain, rather than a representative of their faith. I’m sure that’s true of religious leaders in other traditions as well, particularly ones who lead non-traditional congregations. I don’t think you should worry about making the pastor feel uncomfortable or anything, and I’m sure he would be willing to have a discussion about what kind of ceremony you want. Many spiritual leaders do work and provide guidence to people outside the context of their faith specifically.
Post # 4
- Wedding: July 2014 - Prague
There’s no harm in asking. My uncle is a pastor and he did a non-religious ceremony for us. The worst that could happen is they could just say no.