- 2 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
So, DH and I had a very silly argument yesterday-, but it made me think, and I thought I would bring the topic to the bees to see what you think.
DH HATES inconveniencing people. HATES asking favors. Doesn’t want to be a burden. I get that. I know it can be awkward. But I also know that, as long as you don’t ask too often good friends are usually happy to help.
We are going to a destination wedding at the end of the month. Last night DH brings up that we need to figure out a way to get to the airport, because he doesn’t want to pay to park at the airport for a week. Fair enough. I don’t want to pay either, if we can avoid it. So, I say “why don’t we take a taxi?” He says he doesn’t want to pay for that either. Then he suggests taking the city bus.
Now bees, under normal circumstances, I don’t mind the bus at all. And I take it to and from work fairly often. (we only have one car). But from our house, to the airport, the bus is not exactly a straight shot. It’s a LONG twisty route, and, of course, it stops a lot- and we have to make a transfer. Our city airport is actually pretty convenient to our side of town, it’s about a 15 minute drive. Taking the bus would literally triple (at least) that ride. That, along with the fact that our busses are always busy, and we would have luggage with us, does not make it the most ideal option in my mind.
So I tell him this and suggest (god forbid!) that we ask someone to give us a ride. He gets all stone faced and says he feels really uncomfortable doing that. I just don’t get it. I know every city is different, but our airport is actually pretty easy to get in and out of. It’s on the smaller side, and it is not far away. I have given rides to and from there MANY times, and happily- it just really doesn’t bother me to do that for someone. Our flight is not at the crack of dawn or late at night. AND the last time we asked anyone to give us a ride to the airport was THREE YEARS AGO (becase of the small size of our airport, we had to fly out of chicago-which is 1.5 hours away- for our honeymoon). So it’s not exactly like we make a habit out of asking that particular favor (or any favor really-seeing as how against it DH is).
So, we had a little spat. Me defending my opinion, and he defending his. We really didn’t come to a conclusion, but something tells me we will end up taking the bus. (I even told him that I would be happy to make “the ask”, that he doesn’t have to, but he’s even uncomfortable with that.)
Am I wrong here? Am I asking too much? I guess I just always figured that asking for and doing favors such as this (giving rides, watering plants/picking up mail when people are out of town, and even, horror of horrors, helping people move) was just a part of life. How do you feel about favors for/from friends? Do you feel weird asking people for things? Do you feel super inconvenienced doing something for a friend (to the point that you would be annoyed by said friend if they asked you)?