(Closed) Asking guests to stand for small ceremony?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Asking guests to stand during short ceremony
    YES, since it's short (20 mins or so) : (12 votes)
    14 %
    NO, it's rude, no matter what : (34 votes)
    41 %
    Maybe, set up a few chairs and let guests decide : (37 votes)
    45 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    269 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    Would it be possible just to put in a couple of chairs – maybe half a dozen? I’m just thinking of any elderly guests you might have, they might feel more comfortable sitting. But certainly most people would be more than happy to stand for such a short ceremony. 🙂

    Post # 4
    Member
    2106 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    People come to weddings with purses and cameras and heels. They like to sit down, take a load off, and relax with purses in laps, easily take out a tissue becausd of the beautiful vows etc. Otherwise you will have figity guests. 

    ETA: also, think of the short people. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    458 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I see this being no big deal. I  can stand for 20 minutes.

    Post # 6
    Member
    4525 posts
    Honey bee

    For less than 20 minutes, I think asking them to stand will be fine. Just make sure there’s plenty of chairs for them to sit down afterwards. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    5429 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I can’t stand for 5 minutes… so I voted “put up chairs and let guests decide to sit or not”You may find that some people will sit….

    Post # 8
    Member
    7318 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    You need to have at least some chairs. What if your BFF sprains her ankle a few weeks before the wedding or someone is feeling under the weather that day or didn’t sleep a wink the night before? Asking people to stand still for 20 minutes is a bit much, IMHO.

    Post # 9
    Member
    4194 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

    You can borrow chairs from people- your guests will be a lot happier if they don’t have to stand. Yes, they can stand, but like MrsBroccoli said, your guests will have purses, cameras, little kids- chairs will make them more comfortable.

    Post # 10
    Member
    7908 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    If I’m going to a wedding, I’m probably in heels. Even if I weren’t pregnant as I am now, I’d be annoyed to not have a chair. Plus, I hate struggling to see.

    Also, it’s not just 20 minutes. Polite, type-A guests will show up 30 minutes early. So you are asking them to stand for 50 minutes, not 20. And then if there is a cocktail hour after, they’ll be standing for another 60 minutes after that. Or will there be enough seats in the home for all 30 people to sit at once?

    Post # 11
    Hostess
    3381 posts
    Sugar bee

    If I had to stand still for 20 minutes, I’d probably stop paying attention to the ceremony.  And that would suck.

    Post # 12
    Member
    3699 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Set up a few chairs.  Give your parents a place of honor, as well as a row behind them for anyone who might require a place to sit.  That will also define your space a little better and encourage people to stand up behind the chairs and not around the back of the room. 

    I was going to have most of our guests standing for our Memorial Day wedding outdoors, but ended up getting chairs for everyone when it was 100deg.  If you’re inside your own home, they can kick off their shoes and set down their handbags if need be.

    Post # 13
    Member
    1391 posts
    Bumble bee

    I had a blood clot in my leg and appear perfectly normal.  However, I cannot stand in one place for 20 minutes.  Not only would I be annoyed, but my leg would hurt.

    Post # 14
    Member
    141 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Our wedding ceremony will be very small (<15 people, all immediate family, 5 of those under the age of 25) and on the deck of a WW2 ship.  We haven’t done our site visit yet, but I’m thinking there may not be room for chairs, and am perfectly open to the idea of people standing for the ceremony. In fact, I think having a few chairs would feel weird to the people sitting in them with everyone else towering around them.

    If someone can go grocery shopping, they can stand for a 20 minute ceremony. If when I go for a site visit I can have enough chairs for everyone, then I will do that, but if I can’t, they’ll be standing.

    Post # 15
    Member
    5429 posts
    Bee Keeper

    @Nautigirl:  If someone can go grocery shopping, they can stand for a 20 minute ceremony

    I go grocery shopping but I use the cart to hold me up and I am doing something… walking not standing. I actually have a hard time standing in line, so I go early when there is no line up.

    Post # 16
    Member
    10456 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    While I’m perfectly in good shape and can stand for 20 minutes, I hate doing it. Iota pretty uncomfortable, especially in heels or dress shoes that probably aren’t so cozy. 

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