Post # 1
Hi fellow bees,
I love planning parties and think weddings are great; however when it comes to planning my own, I hate it!
#1 the wedding industry super inflates prices just becauase the word “wedding” is involved. And we don’t have a lot of money, and are not able to receive any help from our parents. Even a smaller $10,000 wedding is a HUGE burden for us. I rather take that money and put towards a great honeymoon and a downpayment.
#2 in starting the process I feel the wedding has become more about the details than about us and our love, and hate that about weddings. I feel like they have become more about money and status, than about celebration and the couple.
#3 while my family isn’t so opinionated, my FH’s family has no issues telling me how they think our wedding should go. This just annoys me because first of all it our day not theirs. Second of all they are eating and drinking on our dime not theirs so they should be grateful for whatever they receive.
This being said planning a wedding was beginning to take the joy out getting married and I was getting very stressed and I don’t want that. So I have REALLY been wanting to elope lately, but at first my fiance said no. Now he is considering it himself but isn’t 100% convinced. So since he did the big proposal when he asked me to marry him and I figured I would do a little proposal of my own and ask him to elope with me 🙂
I want to do something like write a letter about all the reasons I love him and why I want to spend our day with just the two of us, but am not sure about how to set it up. I was thinking of getting a ring pop as joke for the ring and then getting custom fortune cookies made where the fortune says will you elope with me. I was thinking of ordering chinese in and then pretending they came with the food and when he cracks the cookie he will see the fortune that says will you elope with me, and then I would get down on one knee and present him the ring pop and the letter?
What do you all think? Cheesy or clever? Do you have any suggestions for an elopement propsal?
Post # 3
Honestly, I think the ring pop is a bit cheesy, but I really like the idea of writing him a letter. It will help him understand how important he is to you and why you want to elope. 🙂 You could also show him this video; I’m not eloping, but this video is so beautiful, it almost made me want to!
Post # 4
@Legendre2014: I think something like this requires you both to sit down list some pros and cons, hash out money stuff, and talk about it. I worry that you will do this proposal and get rejected and then you’ll be all upset. This topic really requires a couple’s meeting to deal with.
Post # 5
@sienna76: I agree. If he isn’t totally sold on the elopment idea then you might get rejected. The chinese thing is cute (the ring pop is mega cheesy), but yall really need to sit down and talk about it. If yall decide to have a wedding, then both of you need to sit down with his parents and say that yall will be having a wedding, but because it’s on yall’s budget, they shouldn’t be chiming in all the time.
Post # 6
I personally think its adorable (ring pop and all) and I would have accepted a proposal like that from my FI even if he gave me a ring pop!
Post # 7
I like the ring pop idea. Even the letter idea…..
Post # 8
I’d skip the whole Elopement Proposal aspect… and go with the heart-to-heart talk.
Even guys have a vision of what they think their Wedding Day will look like… if Elopement isn’t something he’s foreseen happening… you could be up against some opposition / resentment
It is unlikely that he’ll be immediately bowled over by your Proposal / Suggestion
Which means there is the chance for a huge disappointment on your part… more so if you’ve put a lot of time, thought, and effort into it
Much much safer to just sit and have a conversation, and present a variety of ideas / possibilities in a brain-storming session
Mr TTR had a very specific idea about Eloping to a Destination for our Encore Wedding… he sold me on it because he told me his ideas, and I could see / share in his vision
Christmas Vacation – Beach – Warm Weather – Bare Feet – Just the 2 of Us… followed by an Intimate Wedding Night Meal at a Classy Restaurant… and a GORGEOUS Honeymoon Suite (highend)… then us going on glorious Caribbean Cruise Honeymoon
A once in a lifetime experience
It was an easy sell
In return, our Friends & Family thought it was sad that we weren’t sharing our happiness with them… so I agreed that we needed a more organized Back Home Reception Party when we got back
Which I envisioned as something that was inclusive of family & friends. Fun & Relaxed. Had key elements we love… Cockails, Nibbles, Cake & Champagne, along with a DJ & Dancing. And highlights from our Wedding Ceremony & Wedding / Honeymoon Trip… a CD with pictures, etc. And lots of story telling. It was a great evening, and I sold the idea to him because I too had such a strong vision.
BUT at the same time by talking it thru… the both of us “bought in” and made it better, and contributed things to the mix so we were both invested in the concept
Hope this helps,
Post # 9
It would probably be much better just to talk to him about it instead of making it another proposal. It could be awkward with him rejecting you or telling you no. What is he supposed to say to the elopement proposal if it’s really important to him that his family or friends are there? You could just bring up the potential idea, give time to think about it, and see what his thoughts are on it, discuss pros and cons.
Having that discussion can also help to make sure you’re thinking about all the cons too and that you fully want to elope instead of doing something bigger with friends and family.