(Closed) Asking my fiance to elope with me: A proposal

posted 5 years ago in Elopement
Post # 3
Member
403 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Honestly, I think the ring pop is a bit cheesy, but I really like the idea of writing him a letter. It will help him understand how important he is to you and why you want to elope. 🙂 You could also show him this video; I’m not eloping, but this video is so beautiful, it almost made me want to!

Post # 4
Member
6124 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@Legendre2014:  I think something like this requires you both to sit down list some pros and cons, hash out money stuff, and talk about it.  I worry that you will do this proposal and get rejected and then you’ll be all upset.  This topic really requires a couple’s meeting to deal with.

 

Good luck!

Post # 5
Member
350 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

@sienna76:  I agree. If he isn’t totally sold on the elopment idea then you might get rejected. The chinese thing is cute (the ring pop is mega cheesy), but yall really need to sit down and talk about it. If yall decide to have a wedding, then both of you need to sit down with his parents and say that yall will be having a wedding, but because it’s on yall’s budget, they shouldn’t be chiming in all the time. 

Good Luck! 

Post # 6
Member
1846 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I personally think its adorable (ring pop and all) and I would have accepted a proposal like that from my FI even if he gave me a ring pop! 

Post # 7
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee

I like the ring pop idea. Even the letter idea…..

Post # 8
Member
9955 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I’d skip the whole Elopement Proposal aspect… and go with the heart-to-heart talk.

Even guys have a vision of what they think their Wedding Day will look like… if Elopement isn’t something he’s foreseen happening… you could be up against some opposition / resentment

It is unlikely that he’ll be immediately bowled over by your Proposal / Suggestion

Which means there is the chance for a huge disappointment on your part… more so if you’ve put a lot of time, thought, and effort into it

Much much safer to just sit and have a conversation, and present a variety of ideas / possibilities in a brain-storming session

Mr TTR had a very specific idea about Eloping to a Destination for our Encore Wedding… he sold me on it because he told me his ideas, and I could see / share in his vision

Christmas Vacation – Beach – Warm Weather – Bare Feet – Just the 2 of Us… followed by an Intimate Wedding Night Meal at a Classy Restaurant… and a GORGEOUS Honeymoon Suite (highend)… then us going on glorious Caribbean Cruise Honeymoon

A once in a lifetime experience

It was an easy sell

In return, our Friends & Family thought it was sad that we weren’t sharing our happiness with them… so I agreed that we needed a more organized Back Home Reception Party when we got back

Which I envisioned as something that was inclusive of family & friends. Fun & Relaxed.  Had key elements we love… Cockails, Nibbles, Cake & Champagne, along with a DJ & Dancing.  And highlights from our Wedding Ceremony & Wedding / Honeymoon Trip… a CD with pictures, etc.  And lots of story telling.  It was a great evening, and I sold the idea to him because I too had such a strong vision.

BUT at the same time by talking it thru… the both of us “bought in” and made it better, and contributed things to the mix so we were both invested in the concept

Hope this helps,

 

Post # 9
Member
1772 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@sienna76:  +1

It would probably be much better just to talk to him about it instead of making it another proposal.  It could be awkward with him rejecting you or telling you no.  What is he supposed to say to the elopement proposal if it’s really important to him that his family or friends are there?  You could just bring up the potential idea, give time to think about it, and see what his thoughts are on it, discuss pros and cons.  

Having that discussion can also help to make sure you’re thinking about all the cons too and that you fully want to elope instead of doing something bigger with friends and family.

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