Post # 1
So… I got engaged about a month ago, and I love planning and talking with my mom and my girls about it all. But I have an issue.
Who should I ask to stand with me?
My FI and I made a list of wedding party people. He listed 7 men. done.
I listed 15 women. I have been VERY blessed in my life with female friends, but the truth is that 7 of the ladies are my cousins, who I love, but have not really “been there” through it all, the boyfriends, the challenges and now the wonderful one I get to marry.
My worry is that it will be an issue within the family, hurt feelings all over the place, if I don’t include EVERYONE! We are a close group, and all live near one another… My mom feels that I must have all the girl cousins, plus my sister in-law. period.
What should I do? Have all 15 stand with me? Is that totally insane?
Honor the friends in a different special way?
Has anyone else had this issue? Ideas?
Post # 3
My friend has 14 bridesmaids in her wedding. but they way she plans to do it, they wont be standing up the whole time. I plan to also have my BMs sit down instead of standing, because we have a lot of music being performed and the whole standing thing gets abit tedious after 10 minutes. You can have all 15 if u really want. but that can get a bit difficult dealing with so many people in your bridal party. Are you able to make some of them ushers or let some of them do readings and participate in other ways?
Post # 4
i’d cut the cousins – on top of what you’ve mentioned, 15 bridesmaids will be EXTREMELY expensive! and, it’ll be like where’s waldo trying to find you guys in the midst of 22 other people in your wedding party lol. i think they’d understand that it’s just not feasible to do that many, but plan something special with them, like a cousin bridal brunch or something so they know how much you appreciate them and how you’d love to include them if it was possible or something. but yaknow, it’s your wedding – whoever you want in your bridal party is ultimately up to you and your FH!
Post # 5
It’s up to you what you want to do. If you want to have 15, by all means! It’s not your mom’s decision how many ‘maids you have. Make sure you allot enough money in your budget for 15 bouquets (can reduce the size to accommodate adidtional bouquets than you originally anticipated) and for 15 bridesmaids gifts.
I have a sister, cousin and a family friend that I wanted to include before my close girlfriends and I’ve landed at 10 bridesmaids. My fiancee has 5. Is it a large number? Yes, but I consider myself lucky to have that many people that I want standing at my side.
Just some food for thought!
Post # 6
I just chose my two best friends and my FI’s best friend (a girl, obvi!) After that, it was going to be too hard to choose between my sisters and close friends. I’d say keep it small. Otherwise, you risk insulting your other guests (“she has 15 best friends and I’m not one of them?!?” kind of thing… much easier to understand that you’re not one of 2 or 3 besties)
Your groom could have some of the guys be ushers and/or cut the list or have 2 guys walk down each girl.
In case you couldn’t tell, I think 14-15 bridesmaids is kind of ridiculous… Not to mention how unlikely it is that you’ll get good pictures of all of you!
btw, I’m including my 7-8 close friends who aren’t in the wedding by inviting them to a champagne brunch while I get ready the morning of the wedding. They’re really excited!