Asking your parents?

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
3341 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Sounds like that is what he is doing! Exciting! I specifically told DH not to so this as I don’t much like the tradition (it’s our decision to get married and no one else’s!), but I understand how this is really exciting for lots of people. I hope it goes well for him!

Post # 4
Member
314 posts
Helper bee

My boyfriend told me he wants to ask my dad for my hand.  I will let him because my boyfriend is old-fashioned.  However, I don’t particularly like the idea.  My father and I do not have the best relationship, so I almost prefer to leave him out of the decision.  

Sounds like you might not be waiting too much longer!! 

Post # 5
Member
8071 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

@bella_graystone:  oh man hes totally doing it! Cant wait to see your happy update!

ETA: My SO plans on asking my parents (for their blessing, not permission) next time we see them in March because he knows it’d mean a lot to me and them. I sure hope he doesnt chicken out because we wont see them again until summer!

Post # 6
Member
1168 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@bella_graystone:  They definitely spoke about it but I know for a fact he didnt “ask” because I personally feel that is degrading to me. My FI and parents are super close. They have been before we were engaged so it was no big deal for them. He has always hung out with my dad 1:1. 

Post # 7
Member
419 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

My SO is super traditional, so I expect that he would ask my dad. The fun part is, the first time my dad met my SO, he told him that my “baby-maker” wouldn’t work for ever (pretty classy, huh?), so I think he will still formally ask when he is ready, even though he already knows my family approves. 

On a side note, my mom gave him her approval before she passed away. I don’t know that he asked, but again, he didn’t have to. 

Post # 8
Member
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013 - The Fox Hill Inn

Whooo boy… DH did not speak to my parents (to ask for blessing or permission) despite the fact that I dropped hints that he should AND my brother dropped hints that he should.

My parents were a bit miffed, but they got over it (and they sort of tease him about it a little bit still).

DH said it was because they would have ruined the surprise, which I have to admit, I agree with. He ended up telling only 3 people about it before he proposed (and one of those was the jeweler!) so he was really planning on the element of surprise. And he succeeded… the first words out of my mouth were “are you kidding me?!”

@bella_graystone:  Very exciting for you though!!

Post # 9
Member
37 posts
Newbee

My FI had the ring for a month before asking my parents. We we’re leaving for Europe, where he would propose, and he asked my parents the night before we left. He didn’t think it would stay a secret long if he asked them before that.

Post # 10
Member
515 posts
Busy bee

@bella_graystone:  yes, my So talked to parents together and then had a man to man discussion with my father lol. all i know was that he was terrified (my mom told me). My SO says i’m not allowed to ask what was said during that convo until he proposes. it sounds like you will be getting a proposal soon though! congrats!

Post # 11
Member
766 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I can’t decide. Part of me wants him to and the other part thinks it’d be super fun to surprise the family together.

Post # 12
Member
173 posts
Blushing bee

Haha, after my brother’s wedding last year, my parents were like “so guys… when are YOU going to take the plunge?”.

I think if my SO asked my dad, my dad’s response would probably be something along the lines of “she’s an adult, why are you asking for my input?”. But I’m very fortunate; my parents (and the rest of my family) have always been very welcoming and treated my SO like their own son. Cheesy, but true.

Post # 13
Member
592 posts
Busy bee

My SO wants to ask, tradition in him. Truth be told I take care of my dad more than he takes care of me and neither of my parents would be able to keep a lid on it! Lol.

I see no relevancy for it in the way SO and I conduct our lifestyle. For families that still practice more traditional lifestyles it makes sense, but that’s not us. 

Sounds like your guy is on it though! Hopefully that means good news for you on the horizon.  

Post # 14
Member
234 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

@bella_graystone:  My fiance asked for my mothers blessing (father has passed away). I made it clear that it was what I wanted. I don’t know why people are so against the idea. Its not like my fiance literally asked her permission.. we would have gotten engaged either way. The point is to ask for support and to make sure he would be accepted into the family. 

Post # 15
Member
500 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Mine DH asked my dad 🙂 I can’t remember now why he went to my dad’s house (it’s been over four years), but I think he had to drop something off/pick something up. While there, he told my dad he planned to ask me when we went on vacation and asked my dad for his blessing. I’m getting all choked up thinking about it now :> I had always told DH I wanted him to talk to my dad before he did because I knew it would mean the world to my daddy!

Post # 16
Member
1193 posts
Bumble bee

@bella_graystone:  My FI talked to my parents. I wish I could have been a fly on the wall! I don’t think he asked their permission, but more for their blessing (both parents, not just my dad). I asked him what my Dad said, and he told me that my Dad said I was very loyal and he thought my FI was deserving of my forever. 🙂 Melted my heart.

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