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at what age is a child "a guest"?

posted 2 years ago in Reception
  • poll: which age is a child old enough for their own seat?
    1 : (6 votes)
    16 %
    2-3 : (9 votes)
    24 %
    4-5 : (15 votes)
    41 %
    6-7 : (2 votes)
    5 %
    8+ : (5 votes)
    14 %
  •  
    1.
    Member
    1,355 posts
    Bumble bee
    ceamoste    September 3, 2011  

    i honestly didn't know how to ask that question.

    but at what age would you consider a child old enough to be their own 'spot'?

    for example, my aunt is pregnant, so bye the time i get married, her twins will be just about one.

    do i allow them 2 seats? or 4? because a one year old probably isn't going to sit and eat a full dinner :P

     
    2.
    Member
    6,032 posts
    Bee Keeper
    PrncssDva    October 16, 2010   Memphis, TN

    I didn't include them as +1's unless they actually are old enough to sit in a seat by themselves. If they are lap babies, I didn't include them.

     
    3.
    Member
    1,444 posts
    Bumble bee
    Talishazwi    January 16, 2011   Seattle, WA

    Are you thinking in terms of reporting the numbers to the caterers or when filling out their RSVP card (i.e. We have reserved X seats in your honor)?  I'm going to respond assuming you mean when filling out the RSVP card.  I was planning on reserving a seat in honor of any warm body no matter how old they are.  I don't know what etiquette says if there is any on that topic however it does say their name needs to be listed in they are invited and I'm sure that goes for all ages.

     
    4.
    Member
    1,444 posts
    Bumble bee
    Talishazwi    January 16, 2011   Seattle, WA

    Also, the parents might bring the child in with a car seat.  They would probably need a seat for them.  But I'm curious what other Bee's think.

     
    5.
    Member
    1,355 posts
    Bumble bee
    ceamoste    September 3, 2011  

    @talishazwi - that's what i was thinking, but i was at a wedding recently where the car seats were just placed on the floor, so i don't know.

    as for your question, i think i'm asking for both. our venue only holds 150 guests, so i'm just planning ahead as to whether or not i'm going to give them a chair for a carseat or something else. there will be a large number of children under 3, so if we're able to find some alternative then we can invite more friends, but if it's most appropriate to give them their own chair, then we'll have to cut the list a bit.

     
    6.
    Member
    2,217 posts
    Buzzing bee
    monitajb    July 17, 2010   Sacramento

    I think everyone but babes in the arm (infants) are guests.

    Talk to your venue and see how they prefer to handle small children. You won't be the first with this situation. You may be able to set-up a children's table and hire a teenager to watch the kids there.

     
    7.
    Hostess
    5,534 posts
    Bee Keeper
    Mrs. Spring    May 10, 2009   California

    For kids over 1, we added a seat at the table for them and rented them a high chair.  For kids over 4, they got a regular seat at the table.  I figured the kids probably wouldn't be in their seats the whole time, but I'd rather have planned for too much room than too little.

     
    8.
    Bee Icon
    Bee
    1,713 posts
    Bumble bee
    seashell    September 2010  

    I vote around age 4. Before then, they'd probably sit on a parent's lap.

     
    9.
    Member
    1,355 posts
    Bumble bee
    ceamoste    September 3, 2011  

    @monitajb haha actually we will be the first :P

    our venue isn't an actual 'real' venue. N works at a kids camp and has for umpteen years, so we decided to have the reception in the dining hall as it's free for us, and we can hire any caterer we want. i think one wedding has been held there before? and it was VERY casual (think khaki shorts and golf shirts)

     
    10.
    Member
    510 posts
    Busy bee
    marjojo    July 24, 2010   Nashville

    Ask your venue and caterer for their policy. They probably don't charge extra for for food for lap babies, but if it's an issue of capacity and fire codes, they might count them.

     
    11.
    Member
    3,044 posts
    Sugar bee
    camrie    September 5, 2010   Louisville

    I think any child under 3 wouldn't really need a chair and for catering I'd count them as 1/2 since small kids don't sit still for very long and won't really like a lot of different types of food. Most people I've seen who have babies or toddlers have just put the carriers on the floor and let them sit on their laps.

     
    12.
    Member
    1,444 posts
    Bumble bee
    Talishazwi    January 16, 2011   Seattle, WA

    As of right now, I'll be counting all people no matter the age as a headcount requiring a seat.  As for the caterer, I plan on asking them what age to count but otherwise I think a 4 year old and older is eating the food.

     
    13.
    Member
    86 posts
    Worker bee
    Future Mrs. Blocker    July 17, 2010   Columbus, Ga

    we are counting all children big enough to eat table food... my daughter is 2 and i would be upset if i attended a wedding where i would be expected to hold her in my lap all night. now as far as food is concerned most places count them as 1/2 for buffet style and normally offer something less gourmet for plated dinners we are serving chicken fingers and fries for guest under 12   

     
    14.
    Member
    1,643 posts
    Bumble bee
    Ms. Caniche    September 18, 2010   Orange County, CA

    My location counts any child over 3 as their own person...

     
    15.
    Member
    5,240 posts
    Bee Keeper
    cbee    July 26, 2010  

    I agree with @monitajb -

    Anyone but an infant is probably a guest, but ask your venue/ caterer for their policy.

     

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