Post # 1
A sorority sister of mine is getting married. She’s 3 or 4 years older than me. One of my really good friends (also one of my bridesmaids) got an invitation to her wedding. Despite the fact she will know a good amount of people there, she wants to bring me as a date and thought that would be fun and she’d have someone to hang out with who wouldn’t necessarily see the wedding as an excuse to hit the open bar too hard.
I think it’s weird to come to the wedding, seeing as how I know the bride but didn’t receive my own invitation. I wouldn’t expect to, though, we’re just acquaintances. I don’t want the bride to be like "Uhh why are you here?" and then have to be like "oh I’m so-and-so’s date". I’d be irked if a girl I specifically didn’t invite to my wedding tagged along as someone’s friend date. In fact, I can think of some girls I don’t like that I purposely didn’t invite that I would not be happy if they showed up. Of course, I’ve had serious issues with those bias.
How should I handle this with my friend? Is this a common thing, to bring a friend as a date? Thanks
Post # 3
When is the RSVP due? Do you still have time to think it over? Were you at least cordial with the bride as you’re acquaintances?
I’m probably in the minority, but I believe that if you invite someone +1, then they can invite whoever they want within reason. I would draw the line on a +1 being a child or an abusive ex-signifant other. At several weddings I’ve attended, friends brought friends as dates. Most of the time, the bride barely notices…she’s basking in the glow of just being married!
However, if you don’t feel comfortable with it, then you should tell your friend no. You don’t want to feel miserable when it should be a happy occasion.
Post # 4
Does your friend have a +1? Often if a person isn’t married, engaged, or in a significant relationship, the bride and groom won’t give them a +1 (if there are space considerations). If she got a +1, then I don’t think the bride would mind who the +1 is, but your friend may want to check to be on the safe side.
Post # 5
I’m actually in a similar situation but as the bride.
There’s a coworker(B) that is good friends with another coworker (A) whom I do plan on inviting with a +1. Another coworker (C) told me that coworker A will most likely bring coworker B as his date so I might as well invite coworker B. I decided I’m not inviting coworker B myself because I’m really not that close to her but would have no issues if coworker A brings B with him to my wedding as his date. Hehe. Did that make sense?
But do what’s comfortable to you!
Post # 6
Yes, I’m definitely cordial with the bride. It’s just that we were never at the age to hang out. I wasn’t legal when she was at bars, but we bump into each other occassionally.
My friend got a +1 on her invitation. Most of us get those it seems, regardless of if you’re in a relationship. Probably because we are all pretty young. I included +1’s for all my friends, even if they are single. Maybe I shouldn’t have? Hmm. Can’t take it back now!
And yes, Gerbera, that made sense! Just barely though
Post # 7
I think going as her date is totally fine. If you give someone a +1, I think they can bring whomever they want (within reason as someone else said—a 2-year-old might not fit the bill), even if it is not exactly who you anticipated it would have been. I had someone request to bring their teenaged child to the wedding as their date instead of their husband because the husband had to work. It’s not like you specify "you must be romantically interested in your date" on the invitation! Don’t worry about it and have a good time. Just make sure your friend remembers to put down your name as her guest on the RSVP card so that everyone is on the same page.
Post # 8
As a sorority girl, I think it’s totally fine – go if you want to go. There are a lot of sisters that I didn’t invite, because I’m not that close to them, or I felt like if I invited her, then I would have to invite 10 more people. That doesn’t mean I don’t want them to come, it just means there wasn’t space. A guest is a guest – that can be a boyfriend, friend, some one off the street (though hopefully not). Go and have fun!