Post # 1
So, my FI is starting to plan his Bachelor party. He wants to spend a weekend in New Orleans during a big jazz festival.
Personally, his Bachelor party doesn’t bug me in the least. I’m actually pretty supportive. Strippers and boozing and all that don’t really bug me. I’m even thinking about springing for a limo to surprise them, and I might buy my little brother a plane ticket for his Birthday to go.
But I know not everyone feels this way. Am I being overly optimistic about my feelings? Do you feel differently? I would love to hear how people feel about the Bachelor party.
Post # 3
I really wasn’t worried about a bachelor party but my husband didn’t have one. I hope that this thread doesn’t turn into another heated debate about the wrongs of bachelor parties.
Post # 4
i’m ok with looking at strippers. lap dances i’m not ok with. there’s no way i’m having another girls who-ha rubbing up on my fi. because of that he decided just to skip the strip club all together and they went to dinner and bars.
Post # 5
I am with you the boy activities don’t really bug me, but that might be because my fi isn’t into them at all. His groomsmen are mostly his accapella group lol so I don’t see them getting into too much trouble! I wish i could splurge on a liomo though, what a nice idea!
Post # 6
Strippers for b-parties actually do annoy me. Call me a prude or whatever, but I actually don’t have respect for men who find that kind of thing exciting and fun. Especially men in serious, committed relationships. It’s a respect thing, not a trust thing. I really can’t stand it when I tell people this, and they say, “Well I trust MY man as a strip club!” Well, I trust my husband, too, but I’m also wondering in the back of my head, “why does he want to pay for some other woman’s titties in his face?” It’s disrespectful. Thankfully, my husband agrees completely and had no desire to ever go to a strip club.
Bachelor weekends of going camping, a sporting event, etc. are completely fine and sound like fun. Lap dances and G strings? Not so much.
Post # 7
eh, I’m not crazy about them, but I gave no sass about my husband’s.. however, I do not want to go to strip clubs WITH him. Over new years, after going out to dinner friends pulled into a parking lot of one and I just said No way buddy – make a special trip with your guy friends and leave me out of it. If the guys would sit through the male equivalent and watch me get fondled and harassed by male strippers, then we can talk. (Not that i’d want that, gross)
Post # 8
Well, my FI has actually never been to a strip club. I doubt very seriously he’ll go to one for the bachelor party, but if he does, I could care less. I’ve been to both male and female strip clubs, and I know how I feel when I’m there, so I’m not really concerned about him going. Even if he doesn’t feel the same way, I know he’s not going to do anything that would upset me. To be honest though, I think he’d feel weird at a strip club, and they’ll probably end up at a bar playing pool or something like that.
In conclusion, I wouldn’t care, but I doubt he’d go…so it’s a non-issue with us.
Post # 9
- Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch
I feel the same way, actually… I just don’t care that much. I know he’ll be faithful to me; what do I care if his friends want to go to a strip club?
Post # 10
I’m actually bummed out that FBIL dropped the ball with FI’s bachelor party, so it looks like he won’t be having one (he starts studying for the CFA level 3 exam next week which he’ll take abouright before the wedding, so there’s no freetime in between). I think it’s a rite of passage and something every guy should do on some level. Of course there are certain things I’d rather FI not participate in, but I’m marrying him because I trust him to know where to draw the line (cheat=bad).
Since he won’t be having a proper bachelor party, I’ve decided to surprise FI with a trip to the strip club myself! There’s an awesome steak restaurant at the Penthouse Club here in NYC, so he can eat red meat, drink expensive scotch and ogle tatas the way a boy should=)
Post # 11
I love the idea of all the guys hanging out. I hate the idea of strip shows and all that goes down. FI’s having a boys weekend that will be sans strippers. It’s a total deal breaker for me.
Post # 12
i’m 100% with you Chapstick!! but i dont worry about it b/c i would never even be with a man who wanted to go to strip clubs…i just think it is totally weird/disrespectful/gross/etc etc etc.
Post # 13
The idea of the “traditional” (is it even really, though?) bach party doesn’t bother me, offend me, or make me insecure. I honestly couldn’t care less about him going to a strip club.
That said, FH has ZERO interest in going to a strip club, his friends have zero interest in taking him. Then again, they are all in their late 30’s/early 40’s, which I think has something to do with it. He also doesn’t have the “one last night of freedom” etc. viewpoint. (I only mention the age thing because in my circle of friends, the only ones who have gone to a strip club have all been under 23, the rest have done things like dinner at steakhouse or gone golfing for bachelor parties).
So, for us, it’s really a non-issue.
Post # 14
I flat out banned mine from going. He wanted to but I told him if he went then he can marry himself. I explained that the night before we marry I don’t want some strange girls parts all over him. FI is the only guy I’ve been with that belives in being faithful. So it’s not a cheating thing but a respect thing. He isn’t happy about it but what can he do…
Post # 15
The only thing I didn’t want my husband to have for his bachelor party was strippers. He gave me a hard time about it, but his brother/best man who planned it, didn’t want to piss me off, so no strippers. My husband actually got so drunk he doesn’t remember anything past the first bar! So I hear it was a good time, lol! I think that as long as you trust your soon-to-be-husband and his friends than you shouldn’t worry about the bachelor party.
ETA: The biggest reason my husband gave me a hard time was because me, him and his little brother went to a strip club for his little brothers bday. We bought him a lap dance. So he was like, it was ok then, and I was like because I was there supervising, lol!
Post # 16
My FI hates strip clubs so he’d be fairly displeased if that’s what his boys decided to do for him. He wants to rent a house somewhere and like drink and play poker. I hope his GMs will respect his wishes and not get one of those “house call” strippers cause that is WAY worse than anything that happens in the clubs.