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We always say the bad stuff makes for the best stories. You'll be able to laugh at it in time. Perhaps you can take some youtube dance lessons with hubby to make up for it so you can redeem yourselves at a future time.
I'm sorry that happened! Maybe in a couple of months you'll look back and think it was funny. It all just happened so I could understand the irritation! So just think of the happier parts of your wedding and redo a real "first dance" in your living room! Cheesy but it could be romantic, just the 2 of you sharing that special moment! Who knows, maybe that dance can lead upstairs to the bedroom! (ok-joking!)
@Noelle: I feel you on this. It would irritate me as well. I'm sure you will be able to laugh at it in time, but you're definitely not wrong for feeling annoyed.
Well, just try not to think about the bad parts and only focus on the good parts. That's what I do. Whenever bad memory tries to seep into my mind, I just keep telling myself that what/why I feel bad about is mostly minor and that good parts really overwhelmed all the bad parts... Congratz on getting married!
Awww, sorry, Noelle-a-belle! I think I'd feel exactly the same way if I were in that situation. I'm guessing that 20 years from now you will look back and smile, if not laugh... have you talked to hubby about it? Maybe you could do a re-do... a special night together, dinner, and your first dance how it was meant to go.
Either way, ((hugs)) til you feel better about things, and congrats on your new marriage!
Bvig: we took actual professional dance lessons! Husband is also a great dancer, has a BFA in musical theater! IDK what happened or why he thought it was OK to basically put me in a corner and gallavant around the dance floor for our first dance
You're prob right though......give it a month or two or eight and maybe then I'll think it was funny instead of humiliating.
I'm sorry you have this as your first dance memory!! Did anyone say anything about your dance? Also, it's still too new for you to not be irritated when you think of it... hopefully, the feelings will fade. I'd have hubby take you out this Friday night and have a 2-week anniversary, first dance redo!!
Thank you for sharing your story. It will prompt me to have a chat with FI about what our first dance means to each of us - and I'm sure it will be likewise for others in the hive.
awww i'd be upset too sweetie. last night i was venting to my husband on the phone about how i SHOULD be over some stuff by now, but i'm not. I'm not over the fact that my parents acted selfishly the weekend of our wedding, made us late to our own rehearsal dinner, the rehearsal, AND made me late to my wedding so that i missed out on photos outside. Also that my dad blamed me for not telling him when to shower and put his tux on (um i was at the salon getting hair/makeup done) and that it's what i get for not being on top of things. Despite the fact that I left a printed itinerary on the table next to him. Also, we had to stay in a hotel (and pay for it) because they decided to stay in our house. We paid for the wedding and when we all went out to lunch a few days before, they paid for my bridesmaid and her mom, but when it came time to pay, they rudely handed the rest of the check to us. I know nothing goes perfectly, but i felt like my dad's behavior and their lack of timeliness for an event that they basically had to show up to was really off-putting and ended up causing me more grief than it should have. I don't feel like they were very considerate I guess.
I wish i had some advice for you but it still stings and every time they do something similiar, it strikes a chord and I think, "mmhmm, just like at my wedding"
@Missrain: Ya, hubbie and I talked about it and he feels bad. Says he doesn't know why he did it. In a way that makes me feel worse because he probably thought he was doing something all great while he was doing it, and so now I'm ruining his memory of it too.
That stinks! But he was probably just out of his comfort zone so he did what makes him comfortable. Having that many eyes on you can mess with the best of us!
ejs4y8: JEEZ sounds like you had a really rough wedding day, I'm sorry!
Wow, I can understand why you got upset! I think a kick in the shins is in order. ;) Then you can move on. But really: a big, grandiose apology ought to do it. Tell him we all said so.
Oracle: YES!!!! Def talk about that first dance, and practice it too! We practiced once but apparently once was not enough. Thank heavens we didn't pay someone to video tape the thing.....it would be double bad to have to watch myself stand there staring in utter confusion as I got ditched on the dance floor!
ohh yikes. were there any other chances during the night that you two got to dance together. maybe he just got swept away in the moment. does he know it bugged you? what was your favorite part of the night?
I know it sucks when there's so many things that day that you feel like you just have one chance to do and get right. Don't feel humiliated, no one expects the wedding to be perfect, laugh it off the best you can for now, it's not ideal but I'm sure he's a great guy that just got caught up in a moment.
Our first dance was cringe-worthy for sure. We both were doing the middle school wobble and the song just seemed to last F-O-R-E-V-E-R! It really was never ending. My hubby and I started getting really nervous since everyone was just staring at us. I tried to make conversation but it wasn't working. He then said we should flash everyone the thumbs up sign on the count of three. I told him I didn't want to do it but he started counting.
Him: "One..."
Me: "I don't want to do that!"
Him: "Two..."
Me: "No we aren't--"
Him: "Three!"
I couldn't leave him hanging by himself so on three we flashed everyone the thumbs up sign and I laughed and said "I think it's going well!"
*cricket, cricket*
Hmm okay that wasn't as funny as I thought. We started to sway from side to side again and just decided to ride it out the rest of the way. The song got to a slower part and our guests started applauding and then you heard this "Ooohh" murmur through the crowd as people realized the song wasn't over yet. We finally wobbled over to the DJ during the last few bars and I told him to just cut the song already!
HORRIBLE!! But looking back now I find it hysterical.
@ noelle: that sucks 
I can imagine standing there watching him, and being so ticked off and embarassed that I'm standing there alone - and still trying to keep a smile on my face and act like I think what he is doing is funny..... I'm sure one day you will be able to laugh about it though! I know I can laugh at things now that FI has done that I NEVER thought I would be able to! haha
@hcritton- That made me for serious lol. I think I'll be so super nervous dancing in front of everybody. Perhaps we should practice so we don't go into the awkward sway. lol. Or I might get the nervous giggles.
Hcritton: OK.....so maybe in a month and a half it will be funny 
Thanks for sharing!
Oh no! We're thinking of not even doing a first dance and all the other traditional dances (dad/daughter, son/mother, etc.) We're not big dancing people anyways. In the 5 years we've been together, I don't think we've even really danced at all! After reading your post, I'm pretty much set on NOT dancing!
I'm not married yet, so no stories to share (yet!) but it sounds like he got nervous and resorted to his musical theater roots!
With all the crazy first dance videos on YouTube, your guests probably just thought it was planned that way. Don't be too embarrassed! Were they at least laughing WITH him, not AT him? :)
We just did the middle-school sway, and the band stretched the song wayyyyyy too long. Keep it short, people, keep it short!
Oh my gosh, I think everyone has one or two (or maybe more) things that happened on the wedding day that we just can't forget!
For example, I'm still ticked off about my bouquet, which is silly because from the beginning, flowers were never a big deal to me. But on the wedding day, when my bouquet was delivered, it wasn't at all what I wanted, or had discussed with the florist a few days earlier. It didn't so much bother me at the time because the day was so hectic I didn't have time, but when I think about it, and see pictures, I get mad because I felt like it kind of ruined the feel of the whole ensemble, you know? It sounds ridiculous and silly, but ugh!
I would definitely be upset about your first dance, too, but I have a hunch that over time, you'll be able to laught about it :)
@jhphui: No one was doing anything, everyone was just staring with blank faces. That made it even worse.
my MOH and BMs forgot to bustle my dress before the first dance and I totally didn't realize it until I was already dancing, with my videographer taping the whole thing and I could barely move around.
AND they all decided to run onto the dance floor to bustle the dress in the middle of the dance and they were there for what seemed like an eternity and still no bustle
Awww ((HUGS)) I'd be upset too but it sounds to me like he just got nervous and screwed up what you guys had practiced and resorted to clowning around cause he didn't know what else to do. I know you're upset about it but ultimately it's not a big deal and you'll get over it and be able to laugh about it. And if that's the only thing that went wrong on your wedding day I think that's pretty good. There are WAY worse things than that.
Aww, I am sorry to hear this! At least that was the only not-so-magical part - just keep focused on the positive...and make him make it up to you at a future big anniversary party =)
Aw, I'm sorry! Sometimes guys just don't think, I bet he's kicking himself now! At least you're happily married. Tell him to make it up to you on your first anniversary. :)
I think everyone has a moment or an issue at their wedding that is hard to let go of. *Ejs* and *hcritton* have already shared and that HAD to make you feel a little better (or at least in good company!) :) So I'll share with you the little mishaps that happened at our wedding. p.s. I lamented over them for about 6 months before finally being able to laugh about them - well, most of them anyway....
(1) My rude cousin was SURE that my cake was fondant and "she just hates fondant". My other cousin argued with her and (correctly) stated that it was buttercream. My VERY rude cousin then proceeded to put her thumb in my cake on the bottom tier to "test it out". WTF cuz??!!! WHo DOES that!???? Answer: my dumb ass cousin. At the cake cutting I noticed it and I was SO bummed out that my cake had looked like that for the entire evening. :( So unhappy.
(2) We had our wedding in a huge, historical "gentleman's" club. My husband loves old architecture and antiques. After our first dance and cake cutting were over, we decided to mingle with guests. Well, the hubs decided to take one of his best friends on a tour of the (5 story) building. I lost him for about an HOUR!!! Yes, an HOUR!!! He is also notoriously bad with keeping track of time....when he finally reappeared, I was PISSED. I had to pull him into a private room and explain to him how upset I was with him. It made us miss our family pictures (big group pics at the reception that we had planned on) AND the anniversary dance at which we were supposed to honor my grandparents' 55 year marriage. F(*&ing PISSED.
(3) During the ceremony, our minister refused to say "You may now kiss the bride." He told us that no one really says that and it's just "corny". It was a battle I just couldn't win with him - so I let it go. So, my husband sort of missed the "cue" the minister taught us at rehearsal. As a result, our kiss was a little awkward. stupid minister.
(4) At the very end of the night, our club tried to close up the bar 45 minutes early and without calling "last call". Our wedding planner had left only 15 minutes before and so I had to deal with it. It was really annoying.
Over all we had a fabulous wedding. There will always be a glitch or something that doesn't run smoothly - but that's life and you've just got to focus on all the other GREAT memories of your wedding day (at least until you can laugh a little about your husband's solo performance) :)
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Got married on Friday 10/16, huzzah!
Everything went over pretty smoothy....except for the first dance. It. Was. TERRIBLE. Husband couldnt stay on time. Told me to start leading. When I tried to lead like he asked, he totally let go of me and started spinning like a top all over the dance floor and doing things 'for laughs'. I hate the fact that our first dance was all him showboating around the dancefloor trying to 'entertain' people, instead of a special moment for the two of us. In the grand scheme of things, it's not important. But I can't help but feel irritated every time I think of it. It's like 'our' first dance turned into me standing there staring at him doing spins and stuff all over the dance floor. Very irritated that the whole event became 'husband dancing' instead of the married couple's first dance together. It makes me really sad when I think back on it, instead of being happy. I wish I could look back on it and laugh at it's awfulness, but for some reason I can't.
I know I'm not the only one with a big bad wedding memory. How do you deal with it?