Post # 1
The backround: In about two weeks I have to put down the deposit for our wedding (it’s an all-inclusive and the deposit of $2000 will cover about half of the total cost of everything). My parents (both of them) have insisted on paying for the wedding and my mom who was more involved in the planning (my dad’s a guy he’s not sure of what to make of everything, but’s he’s very supportive) knew of the deposit date and had no problem with it. Fast-forward: as I posted last week my mom died and I spent the week back with my dad getting things together. My dad has said numerous times over the past week that he knows about the deposit and to just tell him when it’s time.
The problem: I seriously feel wierd talking to my dad about this stuff even though he’s said it’s fine. I don’t want to wait until the last minute to tall him because I know that would be unfair, but I feel so weird and guilty talking about it at this time even thought there was an agreement between the three of us for several months. How do I get over this weird feeling and what the heck do I do?
Post # 3
@renwoman: I’m so sorry about your mom 🙁
I don’t think you should feel weird talking to you dad about this– he wouldn’t have told you to tell him when it’s time if he didn’t want you to.
Truthfully, with your mom passing, your dad will likely be happy to be included in any wedding planning/talk. He could probably use the extra company- even if it’s by phone, right now!
Post # 4
@renwoman: Oh wow. I am so sorry about your loss- especially right now! That has to be awful just emotional, but also the logistics of planning the wedding just makes it so much harder. I’m really sorry.
Honestly, your dad brought it up first. Just go ahead and tell him now that it’s due in two weeks. Call to check up on him, he’ll most likely ask about wedding plans and that will be your “in”. It’ll be ok. I’m sure it will be nicer for him to focus on something happy.
Post # 5
I’m sure it feels like a bad time to ask, but maybe giving you and your FH the wedding your mom would have wanted to give you will make him feel like he’s doing something to honor her wishes. Like, yes, it’s hard to accept, for both of you, that she won’t be there. I lost my Grandpa Monday and I can’t imagine losing a parent. There’s a hole in our lives and one less person I love there on our bug day. But, at the same time, I know he’d be so happy to see me have a wedding and get married and suceed, and it makes me and my parents even more determined to see that happen. So, let him do this for you, because he wants to.