Post # 1
Hey newlyweds! I am finally one of you! And I have already found myself in a mildly uncomfortable situation.
My entire family is really big on facebook, which is weird enough as it is. After the wedding, people were posting all over my mom’s wall about how great the wedding was and how beautiful everything was, and she put pictures up.
One of my second cousins (I think? Great uncle’s daughter) who we haven’t spoken to in at least 10 years, and didn’t even really think of inviting, saw the photos and posts and is now apparently very traumatized that she wasn’t invited. We only invited 1 of the second cousins- she and my mother are very close, and her daughter was a flower girl. The other second cousins are scattered and we never talk or see each other- even on holidays.
Anyway, this cousin has now called my mother to find out why no one told her about the wedding. We’ve told her that we had a small venue and were not able to include most of the very extended family. She’s posted all over the facebook walls of everyone in the family that she "can’t believe" no one told her and she "wouldn’t have missed it for the world." Now she’s harassing me in facebook chat almost every day. I mean, luckily it’s easy enough to just ignore that, but it’s really awkward to have all these wall posts saying "Boy, I wish someone had told me about your wedding" every day. Not only does it make her look kind of clueless (it was an invitation-only event, hello?), it’s just strange! I mean, yes, she used to babysit me when I was little, but I didn’t invite every babysitter I ever had!
Did you have any uninviteds harass you after the wedding about not being invited? What did you do about it?
Post # 3
Wow…nothing like rude, immature, petty behavior to make you really regret not inviting her, huh? : P
I’d ignore it and assume it will die down. It’s just making her look bad and desperate for attention, especially if there were large chunks of family not invited for very practical reasons.
Post # 4
LoL, she needs to get over it, she sounds a little intense about it! It’s not like she was the ONLY one who didn’t get invited. I bet she chills over the course of a month. She may bring it up in the future when you see her but you can just be like, "omg let it go already, kay? not everybody else went and they aren’t bitchin’!"
Post # 5
You need to put her on "limited status" and tell your Mom to do the same. . I also have people on facebook currently campaigning for invites. I just remove the comments or ignore. They eventually get the point.
That is so rude. Sorry!
Post # 6
I would definitely ignore it. Wall posts eventually get pushed down, so as long as you’re not responding, it’ll go away in like a week. Let her get all upset. I think it’s a mistake to ignore her chatting, since she can see that you are online. Better to just face it, and send her a chat that you would have liked to invite everyone, but that would have meant (# of people) at (cost per head) and you A) couldn’t afford it and B) your venue wasn’t big enough. Quantify it. Put the numbers out there. And if she comes back with something like "It would only have been me" then you can say that while you love her, it wouldn’t have been fair not to invite everyone if you made the exception for one. If she still keeps at it, I would say you appreciate that she supports you and your new husband. I think a "Thank you" kind of message would shut her up because she can’t come back with anything.
Post # 7
I am sorry, I think that is rude and inmature. She needs to get over it. I had the same situation, with my dad’s cousin’s ex-wife, imagine that! Her comment was how come her kids, who are still part of my family, didn’t get invited! I just think some people see wedding and funerals as family reunions, not the case.
Post # 8
I think there’s a way to not have a particular person’s wall posts show on your wall (I have no clue about facebook, but my sister just told me she had to do this for someone else). I think that’s best. Let the cousin vent it out…there’s obviously nothing you can really do about the situation now. But don’t unnecessarily expose yourself to it.
Post # 9
I feel your pain. My new SIL posted comments in a family member’s facebook album from our wedding calling my sister a bitch. The petty, immature, negative people really shock me sometimes! When people behave this way it’s because they want some attention (among other motivations, I suppose) so I usually try to just ignore it, even though it’s really hard to do that. Even if you try to explain yourself, or squash the negativity, you can’t really control the other person’s behaviour and can just end up more frustrated that you were in the first place.
Post # 10
yah, we have people from CHURCH guilting us…UGH…get.over.it. We can’t *really* use the small wedding excuse, but our venue only fits really 100, and we already invited 150 with family and close friends…I think coworkers were a little miffed too, but oh well…we did what we felt was right for our budget, and we got married in Feb. so everything had to be inside.
Post # 11
Wow. That is obnoxious. I can’t stand people like that on Facebook! I agree, put her on limited profile and if she continues to nag about it, I would just start ignoring her lol
Post # 12
Congrats on your wedding 🙂
Some people just don’t know when to quit, honestly. And I thin it’s totally OK to limit her access to your profile/block her. I mean you weren’t missing her before the wedding, right?