(Closed) B-List invites – Help!

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
4771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999


I wouldn’t mention it and just send an invite.  I know I’ve read people here say they’d rather not be invited than be a B lister, but I totally disagree, at least for me my A listers are mainly obligatory invites that I didn’t really care for, and B list is full of friends I’d love to have there way more.  Here is me hoping the A listers don’t go.

Post # 4
164 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@bunnyfoofoo:i’m debating the same thing. my rsvp date was april 5… and i need them to tell me an entree choice, so i was planning on owning up to it and just calling the person directly and telling them the invitation is on its way, blabla.  but if anyone has experience with the opposite strategy–mailing like nothing happened–i’d love to hear too!

Post # 5
5165 posts
Bee Keeper

Maybe you could just call and ask if they can make it.. and act like you sent the invite and it got lost in the mail?? Its a little white lie and no one will be hurt!

Post # 7
1041 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Just send it and dont mention it. I’ve gotten several intives 4 weeks out and i thought nothing of it. If its someone i care about and i can make it, i will be there. I dont care if i get invted the day before. I doubt anyone will call you out on it, and if they choose not to go becase of the late invite, then they really didnt want to be there anyway. Making up a lie about it being lost in the mail is not really needed and as a guest that would bother me more than just recieving a late invite.

Post # 8
5165 posts
Bee Keeper

@cartascartas: lol yea? then when they say that they never got it she could just be like.. ok ill send another! That way it isn’t dated for after everyone got theirs.. 

Post # 9
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

When I was agonizing over how many of my coworkers we had space to invite, my mom suggested that I just tell them once the RSVP date has passed – “hey, we had to limit our guest list at first because of space, but a few of our family members can’t make it after all and I’d love to have you come!”  I think it would take VERY careful wording and having an idea of how the person would feel about a spur-of-the moment invitation, but I could see it working in some cases…

Post # 10
572 posts
Busy bee

WE had a very tight guest list. I just invited a co-worker late and was up front with her. She was very excited and accepted.

I’m being forced to invite family members that were never on the list. It is so late in the game that I simply sent an email. If they come, great. If not, then they never wanted to come in the first place which is what I suspect and the reason they were never on the list originally.

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