Post # 1
So our invitations have gone out and everyone is getting them awesome! except for now we are having to deal with the whole can I bring my kid questions. I had one guest ask me tonight if her 1 year old is invited, to which I said due to the number of friends and family on their second and third kids (there would be 24 under the age of 5) we can only accomodate babies in arms. The guest then replied with “we have a portable highchair could we bring that and just squish in?” How should I respond to this?
Post # 2
Maybe throw in a polite smile if you’re feeling generous.
Post # 3
Just say no, that space is limited at the venue. If I heard “babies in arms only,” it would sound to me that you were really trying to discourage babies anyway, so I’m surprised someone asked.
Post # 4
Western: No, because it’s inconvenient to other guests, and 1 year olds can be babysat.
The two big reasons to allow babies in arms is because they’re hard to babysit (especially because of breastfeeding) and they’re not mobile (so aren’t really disruptive). Neither of these applies to a 1 year old. A 1 year old will probably be walking (and will at least be crawling) so will want to move around.
Post # 5
Western: maybe just call them and say sorry but you think you have created some confusion. By babies in arms you really meant babies who are breast feeding. That should clear up the confusion.
Post # 6
Western: Just say no. Then move on. You’ve already polietly told them. No need to keep explaining yourself. They are the ones being rude here, not you.
Post # 7
Western: If you don’t want the kid then say no.
“I’m so sorry, but that won’t be possible. I hope you and your husband will still be able to join us.”
If they push then just say that unfortunately, you can’t make exceptions. If they conttinue to push after that then a simple, “I’m sorry, its not possible” or even just, “I’m sorry, but no.”
Post # 8
I wouldn’t say that you meant brestfeeding babies are allowed by saying “babies in arms” are allowed – there are a bunch of moms who breastfeed at 8 months- 1 yr and beyond. are you actually okay with any babies being there? If so, you can say you meant newborns or whatever it is you meant. If not, just tell her, sorry, due to spacing, there isn’t room for extra chairs and strollers at tables. You hope that she and her husband can still attend.
Post # 9
If you meant newborns, you need to be more specific. If you don’t want any babies there, just tell her.
Post # 10
Thank you all for your replies. I guess I should have said newborns since I have 3 friends who will have babies 2 months and under who I would like to attend. At that age they just sleep most of the time. To me that is what babies in arms means. I have a 5 month old and there is no way I would be able to hold him the entire time or let him sit in his car seat. He would just wiggle out of my arms or cry because he is in his seat. A 1 year old is a toddler at this point. I guess I just thought that would be common sense.
Post # 11
Most people have the sense to realise what “babes in arms” means but of course, there are always exceptions!
So I think you’ll probably need to say that what you meant was babies under three months old. I know plenty of people who breastfeed up to a year and Sod’s Law says that if you use that excuse, your guest will fall into that category!