Post # 1
I guess it has been on my mind a lot and I just needed some opinions! My fiancé and I are getting married next year and we are both talking about the possibility of TTC shortly after the wedding. I guess when trying to make a decision like this, anyone would be hesitant. We are trying to figure out if we are ready (as if anyone could ever be, right?)
After the wedding I will be 23 and he will be almost 27. We are both done with college and have excellent high paying jobs. We have owned our own home for 3 years (very nice house in great neighborhood with excellent schools). We are in good health, very much in love, and have been together for 6 years (7 after the wedding). We have also lived together in our home for 3 years, and we feel as though we have done all the fun and exciting things we wanted to do. Our families are both very excited about the prospect of having babies in the family again, and I would love for my dad to meet my child before he passes (he isn’t well).
Everything seems to be in line, and I feel like we are as ready as we could ever be. But, with the thought of having kids at such a young age, I wonder if we are making the right decision? Are we ready?
Thanks for for your thoughts and ideas bees!!
Post # 2
First off, congrats on the upcoming wedding! Also, I have to give you and your FI props on being at such a good place in life. A home and good job are all great blessings in life. However, I would encourage you to at least take the first year to enjoy being a newlywed. I know you’ve been living together for a while, but people always say that the first year of marriage is the hardest. Give yourself a little time for any kinks to work themselves out. I’ve actually heard that people often go through substantial changes in personality and personal growth about every three years. Enjoy your honeymoon, maybe take some more vacations, and fully experience that newlywed glow. Life will change dramatically once you have a newborn in the picture, and you have plenty of time to conceive since you’re still young.
At the end of the day, do what’s best for you and your husband-to-be. Yes, plenty of people will say that you’re young and to wait, and I personally can’t see myself having a baby anytime soon even though I’m 25 and part of a big family where most people have kids young. But that’s me and not you. At the end of the day, as long as you two are happy with your decision, that’s all that matters 🙂
Post # 3
Britneysmith5555: I’ve heard no one ever feels truly ready to be a parent. As long as y’all are doing what you feel is right for you, that’s what matters. I don’t see any reason not to have a child at a young age, if you both want to and have your ducks lined up (sounds like it). There are some people who want to enjoy a couple of years as a married couple before having children, but I don’t see anything wrong in going ahead if that’s what feels right for you.
Post # 4
Britneysmith5555: Everyone will tell you it’s up to you two and your situation. You both need to be “ready” for having children. Though you will never be 100% prepared, you both need to be “ready” to make the necessary sacrifices and go through the struggles, joys and challenges of parenting.
For some people, that is when they are younger. For other’s when they are older. You sound like you are both in a stable, healthy position. That is a good start. But that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the right time. You both need to discuss and argree on when that is.
In comparison, DH and I are very similar like you two. We own our home, we have great paying stable jobs and we have been together for 11 years (married for 1 year). We are 26 and 28, but we still aren’t ready for children. We plan on waiting 3-5 more years because we want to travel, pay off more of our home and enjoy our 20’s as a childfree couple. Does that mean I don’t have baby fever? Absolutely not. Lately, it’s been really bad actually. But, luckily, my logical/rationale side has kicked in and calms me down.
Best of luck, OP!