Post # 1
SO I feel pretty terrible right now. I never changed my last name to my Darling Husband, he was always totally fine with this. I don’t get offended at all when I am addressed as my Darling Husband last name. I didn’t want to change my name professionally in the workplace which is why I never did it. I used to be more opposed to changing of the last name before I got married, but now I really don’t mind. I would still like to have my maiden name professional but wouldn’t mind changing to my Darling Husband for everything else.
The thing is this, I was going to do it when I found out we were expecting, but it turned out to be more of process than I thought, changing the bank and cars and mortgage and all that just freaks me out and overwhelms me so I never did it, and again Darling Husband didn’t care. I asked him if he minded and he said no and I thought that in the hospital the baby would have his last name on all the wrist bands and such, but silly me thought wrong, everything will be in my maiden name and the baby. Obviously the birth certificate will say Darling Husband last name but I just feel awful that on the birth annoucements and wrist band and such it will say my name and not Darling Husband or OUR name. I am due in 3 weeks, is it too late to change verything?? Or if not those of you have kept your maiden name was a big deal to you or your Darling Husband in the hospital?
Post # 3
@ams12: If you have the intention to change your last name, just have them signed the birth certificate with his last name..then its less of a hassle later on.
Post # 4
I know that for where I live if I have my marriage license I can fill out whatever forms I need to with my married name.
SOOOOO since you ARE married you should be able to change your patient info to your husbands last name. Take your marriage lisence with you and it shouldn’t be an issue at all.
I still haven’t changed my ID but Darling Husband and my bank account are our (his) last name.. I just took in my marriage license.
This should work for you too. =)
Post # 5
@ams12: It shouldn’t take that long to change your name. I went and did it, got a temporary licence with my married name, and I just had to carry my old licence around with it as picture ID. You just need your marriage licence to do that. Are you in Canada?
Post # 7
it’ll be okay! are you in the US? it took me a day 🙂
I went to social security office with an [official] copy of my marriage certificate (which took the longest to get..couple weeks) and they changed my name, printed me a piece of paper that said legally I had a new name on my social security card. in short, the piece of paper was my social security card.
took a week or so, and I got my new one in the mail. as far as my license, you have to allow 24 hours after changing your name at SS before you can head to the DMV (or AAA, as I did!). they will print you a temp driver’s license with your new name.
if you already have an official copy of your marriage certificate, it only takes a few days – and then another week or so to get the official stuff in the mail.
Post # 8
@ams12: Other bees who may have broader knowledge of this than I do, please correct me if I am wrong. However, based upon my personal experience and that of my close friends, the first step in changing your name would be to take your marriage license/certificate to your local branch of the U.S. Social Security Administration and to obtain a new social security card in your married name. After that, the next step would be to take your marriage license and new SS ID card to your local branch of your state’s Motor Vehicle Administration to obtain a new driver’s license in your new name. After that, you should be able to change your name on anything else by presenting/mailing in a copy of your marriage license/certificate and, if required, copies of your new ID cards. You should be able to enact the two most important of these changes within a couple of days so that you’ll have your name legally changed by the time the baby arrives. (Also, you should make sure to change your name with HR/finance/payroll at your place of employment and with your health insurance company so that medical claim forms for your hospitalization and the baby’s birth would also be in your new name.) Then, while you are home with the baby, you could contact your credit card companies, 401K plan administrators, college alumni associations, and all of the other places where you would want to change your name.
Also, you mentioned wanting to keep your name professionally. I just wanted to note that SSA instantly will permit you to change your name in one of two ways with just a marriage license/certificate. For example, if your name currently were Jane Marie Smith, and your husband’s last name is Jones, SSA will allow you to change your name to Jane Marie Jones OR Jane Smith Jones (where you would drop your given middle name, and your maiden name would become your new, legal middle name. The latter option is not only the formal, traditional way for a woman to change her name, but also it is an excellent way to provide continuity of your identity professionally. This is how I changed my name, and I could not be happier with this decision, as it is SOOO much easier for people to realize that “Jane Smith Jones” IS Jane Smith (but now she’s married), instead of an entirely different person, Jane Jones.
Best wishes to you and your husband on the pending birth of your baby!
Post # 9
Check with the registrar of births. Where i live, if both parents on registered on the birth certificate, you can name the baby anything you want. It can be but does not have to be either one of your names or a hypenated name.
Smith and Jones can have baby Picklesnag if they want.
Post # 10
I think the issue is that the name band for baby will say whatever mom’s last name is. This is separate than what is put on the birth certificate (which I know for some states will automatically be the fathers name unless the father is not known.. regardless of what’s “wanted” or there is some kind of court order of reliquishing rights)
Since the baby’s band goes by your last name, you will either need to change it or check with your hospital to see if your marriage certificate is enough to fill out your forms with your husbands last name.
3 weeks should be enough time to change your name for your lisence, social, and insurance and the rest can wait till AFTER baby. Don’t worry about getting everything (ins, etc) all done before baby if you can’t… just what’s neccessary for the arm band. =)
Post # 11
My last name is hyphenated– DH’s and our baby’s last name is not. The hospital paperwork and our name bands at the hospital had my last name on them and it wasn’t a big deal. We were surprised by how little there was for the dad to sign but that was all… again, neither of us were particularly bothered by it. The birth certificate has the correct name and that’s all that matters for insurance, social security, etc. for the baby.
Post # 12
When I got married, I changed to FH’s health insurance. They put me on in my married name before I had done anything else. You might be able to have them just switch this. Otherwise, you can go to Social security, then after that I believe you can go right to the DMV. I still haven’t switched all bank stuff (2 years later), and my mortgage was only changed since I refinanced.
On the other hand, I have a friend who was pretty much in the same boat, and it didn’t cause any trouble to have the baby listed as “Baby Boy HerMaiden.” It’s not like they use the first name anyway. They sent out birth announcements with the married name. The only issue is that people who are visiting need to know to look for you under your maiden name (but if you want to avoid people, you have a great way).
Post # 13
I changed my name with Social Security and my Driver’s License in the same day. It didn’t take long at all. I am sure you can let your doctor, insurance, and hospital (during check in) know that you changed your name.
Post # 14
I’m a NICU nurse and we identify babies by their Mum’s last name while they’re in hospital. From what I’ve heard, it’s not a big deal to most dads. You’ll be in and out of the hospital in a couple days anyway and when you apply for your baby’s birth certificate you can use your husband’s name. I wouldn’t worry about it now, I think it’s more trouble than it’s worth.
Post # 15
It really isn’t that hard to do the big stuff: First change your name at your local Social Security office. All you need is your marriage license to do that and I did it on a lunch hour and it takes only like 24 hours to take effect. Once you have your new SS card you can change your name on your license (again a lunch hour task) and you can immediately call your health ins. co (or even have your work do it) and they will do it for you. The other stuff (credit cards, car ins, bank info, etc) can generally be done via phone and/or by filling out a form. That stuff for me took me longer, I did it over the course of a few months. I actually never changed the name on my mortgage (on the advice of my attorney he said no biggie). We eventually refinanced and then my married name was used at that time.
Post # 16
If you can change everything before you get admitted that would be great and wouldn’t be a problem. Once your admitted however, they have to put the name your listed as on your health insurance or else they wont pay your medical bill the insurance will reject your claim and the hospital will bill you directly so change it asap with your health insurance or it will be a big hassle if your hospital name and health insurance name dont match.