(Closed) Baby psychology

posted 8 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
1645 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

The best advice that I’ve received is to do what you feel is best foryour baby and your family. There is so much research, but the fact is that every few years the “right” thing to do changes, and kids are growing up fine.

It is so confusing and I’m already overwhelmed with all of the contradicting information out there. Despite the fact that I have graduate work in human and child development! There really are no easy answers.

Post # 4
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

My mom has some very old fashioned beliefs, even though some of them have been proven to be wrong (she says a pregnant lady should eat whatever she wants and gain whatever her body says….i’m sure we all know this is not advised, in addition to some other wonky beliefs). There is a LOT of information out there. If you’re anything like me, you’ll stick to the real studies (aka pubmed type stuff–research with some data attached to it), talk to your doctors/pediatricians about it, do research, and come to YOUR OWN conclusion. I agree with mrstilly that the “right” thing to do seems to change constantly; i’m sure cry it out works for some babies, not so much for all. Try stuff and see what works? Sorta like the noodle analogy–throw noodles against the wall until one of them sticks, then you know it’s done!

My mom and my MIL had very, very different methods of raising children. Unfortunately, my mother has no problem telling me how to raise my own, whereas my MIL is very hands off “that’s your business”. 

I think a lot of our mom’s opinions (aka those from 25+ years ago) are relatively outdated and based on theories–I know my mom certainly hasn’t read any studies on childhood behavior recently!

Post # 7
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

lol if they make books like that, i would love to know! I’m under the impression EVERY book on childrearing has a slant of some kind.

the noodle strategy…it’s a good approach =]

Post # 8
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

i saw a play about a woman who got every opinion from everyone and she tried everything to do everything “right” when there really is no right way when it comes to babys. it ended up driving her crazy.

Post # 9
Member
950 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

hmm…I’m biased.  As a school teacher, I like to go with  case-study data.  As a school teacher, I also like to go with first hand experience.  As a school teacher, I see that some parents who go with the “cry it out” method work well & some parents that don’t go with the “cry it out” method work just as well.  So, as a school teacher, who’s with kids all damn day, I go with “follow through with what you say” method.  If you say no…stick to it.  If you say yes, but with conditions…stick to the conditions.  If you say yes with no conditions, understand that your kid/baby will expect to get away with it every time…stick to that for those behaviors you want to see more of & don’t stick with that for those behaviors you don’t want to see more of.  Basically, pick a method that fits &, if it works, stick with it…don’t change it up because it will confuse the kid/baby.  Confusion leads to frustration…for both kid/baby and parent.  Good luck!

Post # 10
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

I think you will find parents, and moms especially, are very passionate about a LOT of topics!  And very often believe their way is the best and only way.  I say educate yourself as much as possible when you are ready – read up on good, reputable books, studies, etc.  Talk to your friends to understand what worked/didn’t work for them and then figure out what works best for you and your family.  I don’t think there is a one size fits all approach. 

I can tell you I have really enjoyed reading Baby 411, The Happiest Baby on the Block and Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child.  These were all recommended to me by friends I trust and I made sure they were credible.  Although credible does not equal “right”!! 

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