(Closed) Baby Shower Insanity

posted 8 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I honestly think she is being super unreasonable, if she wants to dictate the size, decorations, and invitations she should throw her own party. Seriously, I would tell her that if she wants specific decorations and invitations than she can pay for them, if not she has to back off and let you throw the party.

Post # 4
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Sounds like she’s planning her shower just fine by herself. Maybe tell her that if she doesn’t let you plan it, then she can do it herself as you have enough on her plate as it is.

Post # 5
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

I think you should let her know that hosting the shower means you are planning the shower.  Also, hosting the shower means paying for it, and since she’s already strongarmed you into hosting more people than you are comfortable with, she doesn’t need to be deciding on expensive invites.  She wants the invites to coordinate with the nursery decor???  WHO DOES THAT???  She sounds a lot like my SIL…planning her own party.  I think at this point you need to let her know that either she backs off and lets you throw her a party, or you will turn over the planning (and costs!) to her since she’s so deadset on planning it anyway.  RUDE MUCH??

Post # 6
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Wow… I was happy just to have someone throw me a baby shower when I was pregnant and I didn’t butt in too much.  I think that if you are offering then it should be what you can afford for 1 and also what you feel is best.  I think 25 people is plenty.  Most people will send gifts and maybe show up for an hour or so.  I think she is stuck on some baby shows and needs to get off of it.  I think you are doing everything you need to and don’t hesitate to tell her that you are payinng for it and that you should have to right to plan it.  end of story.  Good luck. 🙂

Post # 7
626 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Wow!  That is an extremely uncomfortable position she’s put you in..  I’m sure you don’t want to do anything to cause conflict in your relationship, but she is being very unreasonable!  Hopefully you can find a way to deal with it without causing a huge coflict.   Maybe if you quit telling her what you plan on doing she will stop putting in her 2 cents.  Just tell her it’s a surprise if she asks… or that you’ve been working super hard on it and you’re sure that she’ll really love and APPRECIATE it when she sees it in person on the shower day.

Usually the only thing the mama only dictates small things that they feel strongly about (like not wanting to play the game where they wrap toilet paper around their bellies because they’re self conscience about how much weight they’ve gained.. lol).  Definitely not about decor, invites, attendance prizes, or food (unless there are allergies or something of course).

Good Luck!!  and I hope she gets her head on straight soon 🙂

Post # 8
1 posts
  • Wedding: May 2009

I can understand BOTH sides. I COMPLETELY understand where you are coming from because you offered to plan the shower. BUT you did OFFER. She didn’t ask you so maybe thats why she feels like it’s ok to put her imput in. And even though she is being a bit rude with the way she’s handling things….she should have a say in her shower because it is HER shower and she’s going to be the one that remembers it for the rest of her life and tells her child about it one day. I’m not saying either one of you are completely right or wrong, but maybe before you started planning things and she gave you the reings…you should both have sat down and discussed some thoughts.  🙂  Good luck!

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