Bachelorette Party Drama

posted 3 years ago in Beauty
Post # 3
Member
195 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Grandma's Oak Tree

@blonddc828:  I think it may be beneficial if you talked with each of them privately and acknowledge that “A” doesn’t care for “B” but explain that this is important to you, you’d love to have them there but if they can’t put their differences aside for a few hours in your honor, it may be best if they don’t come.

Post # 5
Member
195 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Grandma's Oak Tree

@blonddc828:  Personally, I’m not having one at all. Not because of issues with drama, I’m just not interested. If it’s really important to you to have one, have it. Don’t stress yourself. Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but it doesn’t get you anywhere. As far as these girls go, just explain that you’re not taking sides but you won’t tolerate any fighting amongst them. They can respect your wishes or not participate at all. Good Luck!

Post # 7
Member
195 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Grandma's Oak Tree

@blonddc828:  Anytime!

Post # 8
Member
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I’m in a similar situation. I want a bachelorette party and told both of them that I know they don’t like each other, but I love both of them and if they care for me they will keep everything civil. Its been good so far. I also had my sister (MoH) keep them apart as much as possible when it comes to planning to help keep the peace. 

Post # 9
Member
789 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I like the idea of having a trusted friend or sibling run interference if necessary.  Also, talk to them and let them know you hope they can get along since they are both important to you.  Good luck!

Post # 10
Member
1584 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@blonddc828:  My only advice is just hope they respect you enough to keep their drama out of the picture for one night.

I was a bridesmaid in a friends wedding a couple of years ago, and her bachelorette party was an entire weekend at a beachtown near where we live. Her sister and I used to be great friends, but had a huge falling out and literally couldn’t stand each other. We managed to keep the peace for the weekend, out of respect for the bride.

Post # 12
Member
189 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@blonddc828:  Let me share lessons learned and be the warning of what can happen if you assume people know how to act.. I know how hard it is to have people not getting along/approving.  and I’d be upfront and state your position… firmly sharing that if they can’t play nice they do NOT HAVE to play (as in come to the party at all).  

We had drama. I was told I was making it up – to go along and make nice that everyone “was grown” and would behave. sooooo not what happened …  it was horrid. He named 3 of my 5 bridesmaids — 2 were the major issue. 1 brought two friends that dont speak to me as her “backup” and out of those 4 women someone told our hostess some ugly things before I got there – it was a horrible party with the room divided and the “unhappy” people starting out with us at dinner and leaving halfway through without a word to the other side of the room.  As uncomfortable, hurtful, and unfun as that was  I also ended up with my entire family offended (moms and aunts at dinner) and it made for a very weird continuation of the wedding prep that ended up in OTHER meltdowns and some tense moments even the morning of the wedding as we dressed.  

I honestly wish I’d canceled and taken the CRAPSTORM that would have reigned down on me for doing what I wanted with whom I wanted instead of sucking it up and making myself sick. & I was. He still doesn’t know his coworkers wife and sorta godmother were the only people from his “side” that kept the peace and tried to make things flow but it was horrible.  His godmother apologized in the days leading up to the wedding and told me standing up to them is the only thing that works – since the wedding I’ve been best at ignoring and avoiding them (and it’s been cold and icky so we’ve been sick often) 

Sorry to be the voice of doom.  I think I had kinda blocked it out until I saw your post. Good luck & remember to celebrate you and your transition the way YOU want.  

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