Post # 1
My bridesmaids are wonderful and planned what I’m sure is an amazing bachelorette for me.. I don’t know the details other than that we’re going to the city.
I only gave them an invite list of my closest friends (like 11 ladies) and they asked the girls months in advance if they could come or not, all but 1 said yes.
3 of my close friends said yes and now that they yesterday recieved the evite and found out the cost, they’ve all backed out. They all said it was too expensive.
So I found out, the total came to $160 a person. (I had no involvement in what they planned or cost or anything) It’s local, one night, no idea if it’s overnight or not – I don’t know anything else about what the plan is (or was anyway – not sure if they’ll have to change it after 4 girls (there’s one more for a diff reason) backed out last minute 🙁 )
Would you skip out on one of your close friend’s bachelorette parties if it cost $160?
I’ve understood it as this is not a crazy amount to spend on a bachelorette.
I know some of them are tight on money right now but they have literally known it was happening on the date it is for the past 8 months.. so they had loads of time to make a plan.
I’m feeling really hurt and disappointed. I also have 2 other good friends who’ve backed out of the bridal shower (one of those is skipping the bach too) so I’m just feeling rather bummed and can’t shake it. 🙁 Blaaah.
Post # 3
that is too much money- really about 100 is all that should be spent on an in town night out.
Post # 4
I don’t know. Between bridal shower gifts, wedding gifts, bridesmaid dresses Ect. Yes $160 can be alot to spend For many.
Post # 5
It all depends on your friends and their lives – in college? Recent graduates? College (or other) debt? Pay grade in their careers? Weddings / events of their own to pay for soon? Children?
I’d throw out 2-3 ideas, including budgets, to your friends to see who’s interested in what. Then you can pick an event you want to do that your friends can afford.
Post # 6
Jeeze, I’d say even 100 bucks is a lot, 160 is way too much. My bachelorette party cost everyone 30 dollars total. Five people, 30 bucks, dinner not included (Was gifted by my mother, so that’s an external circumstance).
So, I’d say 160 is too much, yes.
Post # 7
@NewYorkLady: I don’t think that’s too much money, bit depends on the plans I guess. If all these girls agreed to the plans then backed out due to costs it’s annoying. Obviously thinhs cost money, I wouldn’t agree to a fancy restaurant and hotel room (for example) if I wasn’t prepared to share that type of expense.if the plan is strippers and drinks, that’s way too much. A whole day thing, soa pkg or something I would expect that amount. If I attend a bachelorette I fully expect to help cover the bride’s way.
Post # 8
Did they know about the cost prior to yesterday? If no then yeah, that is way too much for this short of notice. I’m sorry it happened this way! I hope you still have a fun night.
Post # 9
$160 doesn’t seem expensive to me, assuming it’s for dinner, drinks, club, and maybe a limo/party bus – plus for my good friend who’s getting married? Of course I would go.
Post # 10
@NewYorkLady: I don’t think it’s too much at all. For my night out, between the limo, hotel room, dinner, door covers and drinks, we each spent around $200. I’m sorry, but a friend who’s known about it for months had time to plan and save money
Post # 11
I would be able to swing it if I knew the cost at least a few months in advance. If it was too expensive, I most certainly wouldn’t back out without proposing a few lower-cost alternatives. If a lower-cost option couldn’t be agreed upon, I’d plan something special 1:1 with the bride to celebrate and help her de-stress before the wedding.
Post # 12
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
@NewYorkLady: I would back out. Sorry. I don’t have an extra $160 lying around to shell out. Bachelorettes have gotten too elaborate and expensive imo. I remember the days when everyone would chip in $20-30 to rent a limo and then buy your own drinks as well as one or two for the bride. Whomever was planning the party should have tried to discuss the budget with everyone ahead of time before making plans that cost over $50 per person.
Post # 13
I’m sorry! Unless you were my very best friend in the world, I wouldn’t spend $160 for a bachelorette.
Post # 14
It would be too much for me.
I live in one of the most expensive cities in the US, I’m a heavy drinker, and I can afford (what I consider) extravagance on a night out – and I expect to spend around $50-$70. Even with the bride’s share, that’s HALF of what your bridesmaids are asking people to spend.
I would be bummed too to have people backing out of my bachelorette party – but I would be blaming the bridesmaids, not the folks backing out.
Post # 15
Eh, it’s kind of a lot. My girls are only paying for their dinner and we’re going to a reasonably priced restaurant. I made sure to be involved in the planning for this very reason. I have 9 girls coming and they knew up front all the costs.
Post # 16
If they said they couldn’t afford it, then it’s too much. If you really want your friends to be there, I would try to adjust your plans so more people can participate.