Weddingbee boards

hey~~~

i was wondering if having a bachelorette party or a bridal shower is something every brides need to have..

unfortunately my MOH, my sister, and my mom live in Florida and im not expecting them to organize anything for me, considerating that they have no money and they wont be able to fly to boston not until the wedding..so why pay and organize something if they wont be able to be here? right? one of my bridemaids lives in Fl as well.. an other one is 16 and my last one just moved to Boston..the girl in boston wants to do something for me so badly, but we dont have any friends in common since we work different jobs..there are 2 people only that i know, but they are mostly her friends and they are not invited to the wedding so how akward will be having my bachelorette party with her and her 2 friends?!?lol i dont have many friends either since i moved here about 2 years ago.. i have few friends at work but that's it! not that i really care, but when people ask me what i am doing for my bachelorette party and i answer simply "nothing" they are like"oh no, you should have something"! HOW?!??! at this point i will throw myself my own bachelorette party, but this is not the way it is supposed to be... the girls at work said they will do something for me, but i have my doubts...

i believe my FI's mom will throw me a bridal shower, but she doesnt have too, i dont realy care anyways..she has been so helpful and i really dont feel like she should take care of this too...

im ok with not having neither of them, but i feel like i am not enjoying this whole experience as the other brides...and it kinda upsets me because i wish i had my family closer and do all those fun things every bride do....:(

i assume we will be going out all together the night of the rehearsel dinner, BUT it is not the same thing.. my FI is going for his bachelor party next weekend (home alone with the cats, how nice?like an old cat lady) so this kida upsets me... then the girl who lives in florida is getting married in april and she just had her bridal shower and it kinda makes me jealous cause she is having a perfect traditional wedding...UGH!

@ miss chapstick!! yeah i dont feel the need to do it, but i feel pushed to have one because everyone tells me i should have one! a crazy bachelorette party is not really for me, i rather do something nice and quite since we also have a 16y/o in the bridal party...but it is not going to happen..

i just feel my FI has to have one..he is killing his butt off between work and school and helping me out with the wedding, plus he has to hear me everyday bitching about something cause apperantly i LOVE TO COMPLAIN LOL so he deserves one..

@missasb--yeah i cant force my mom and sis to fly over here when they cant because of money and time... and i cant really fly down there either cause im using all my vaca for the honeymoon and i really dont want to mess up with work situation....

I'm in a similar situation between people living all over and most of my friends are crazy stressed out trying to graduate PhD students locally.  It does not really bother me to not have one at this point.  My FI and I wanted a simple wedding and are trying to keep it that way.  FI is having a tough time with the thought of a registry and we have already told a number of people locally that we are not going to be able to invite everyone.  If they want to have a bbq or day on the lake sometime later in the summer to celebrate, great but if not that is ok.  

My advice is to go what fits you and your situation.  If that means you take some time a day or two before the wedding or you just go pamper yourself the evening of your FI's bachelor party.