(Closed) Bad Relationship with MOH

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
879 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@meg131: I hope someone chimes in with some help as I don’t know what I would do in a similar situation :/   I do feel bad that she did not feed you or give you a seat during the wedding.  I’m  sorry, but the wedding party are guests too!  Sounds like your friend has no tack or regards to your situation.   I would never insist upon myy BMs to buy an expensive dress or pay for manicures unless I could pitch in somehow.  And making you pay postage for her thank you letter is appalling to me.   I would say try to brush it off, but if what has happened really bothers I would talk it over with her without being accusing or resentful.  I think it may be a bit extreme to unask her to be Maid/Matron of Honor, but only you know what would be best for you.  Good luck!

Post # 4
1415 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Maybe try to think of the reasons you asked her in the first place and why it was the right decision at the time? It sounds like a tough situation.

Post # 5
1628 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I agree that some of the things she did were crazy–having you not eat or get to sit?! That is crazy. But having over 100 more than you can handle at a wedding shows this girl REALLY was not on top of her wedding planning!!  As for not being acknowledged as Maid/Matron of Honor, I think you need to let that go–particularly the wedding license part, as it is really the couple’s choice as to who signs (and frequently is a nice way to include people not asked to be in the bridal party anyway).  I think you really need to just take some time not talking to this girl and then once you’ve cooled down try saying “look, for my wedding I had a really different version of how things will go, so I wanted to double check and see if these plans are cool with you…” and use that as a segue into how your feelings were hurt for some things (I’d stick to the way you felt like you were being taken advantage of, and not say anything about the program/license)

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