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Ugh. I don't think people realize how important it is to mail back the RSVP.
I was constantly referring back to the originals to make sure I had everyone in my spreadsheet, etc. You can't remember every FB message, phone call, voicemail, text message!!!
Oh my gosh, I would be so annoyed at the phone call. Courtesy guest? What are you supposed to say about that? I guess she just wants to connect with you about your wedding. At least they want to tell you they will be attending and not calling you at work to decline! That is hilarious about the facebook yes or no event!! ahha!
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OK. Wow. The FB one is pretty bad. Somehow I can see 1 or 2 of my friends doing that on my wall. To which I will promptly reply get on our wedding site and RSVP!!!
yeah...it sucks but i'll admit that before i started planning my wedding, I was someone who forgot to mail the card in and would just call/email/text. Im still irritated with people who are not following protocol...but now I am limiting my irritation to people that got married LAST YEAR so they know how stressful this whole RSVP-ing crap can be...
At this point, I am just glad to hear from whoever we invited whether they are coming or not. (But we didn't provide RSVP envelopes with stamps, we asked people to RSVP on our wedding website)
I can understand why you are frustrated. But on the bright side- at least you didn't have to hunt them down!
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On Facebook? Really?!?! Wow, that's a liitle weird! haha! Hope you start getting some cards back in the mail!
We have people verbally rsvping *to my mom* who is just updating our online guest list. On the one hand I guess that's convenient, but on the other hand it's really annoying -- just stick the card back in the mail and send it to us, already. We stamped it for you and everything. I also worry that people who just verbally RSVP aren't as certain about coming as people who send the card in... siiiiiiiiiiigh.
I think I'm most annoyed with the Facebook rsvp. I wrote back, fine I'm putting you down for 1. I invited her with a guest, but I'm taking her guest option away on the grounds of breaking rsvp rules :) She knows better, she works in catering! Particulary, the I'll eat whatever, comment. She knows I need to give the caterer a count!
On a good note - the REAL rsvp cards are coming in daily!! I have been going home during lunch to check the mail because I'm obessed 
Um, people have been calling my FMIL to RSVP to my wedding. Even though on the invitation it lists MY HOME PHONE NUMBER AND OUR WEBSITE.
I'm sick of it. People are so dumb!!!!
Well, they lost the invites, which is aggravating but not that horrible. Given that situation, what would you prefer them to do? Not tell you anything? Not come?
It's still aggravating though :)
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I can see the frustration in people misplacing your invitations, but I agree that it's better to hear from them one way or another than having to reach out to them again or not hear at all. I think that because we don't use formal etiquette very often in our daily lives people don't realize that it's important to respond formally to your formal invitation. I can understand it's probably inappropriate and distracting to get a call at work, but you may just try to let it go and be happy these people want to celebrate with you.
HA! I've been getting family members stopping me when I see them and saying "do I have to ascually RSVP? You know I'm coming, right?"
Ugh! That's not the point!
Anyway, we feel you. That is really annoying.
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I think I'd be relieved they at least contacted me! Some people lose the RSVP and then just show up!!
Honestly, I don't see what the big problem is!! They lost the invite, it's a totally honest mistake so they clearly can't send back the RSVP if they don't have it!
I don't have FB nor will i create a page for the sake of the wedding. I will also NOT have a wedding website so its RSVP or they are SOL. If you don't RSVP - NO SOUP FOR YOU! (Seinfeld Anyone?)
The FB RSVP is really too much...seriously, people's lack of tact these days is appalling sometimes.
LOL BebehSmile (huge Seinfeld fan)...I've had daydreams of turning away some of my FI's "family friends" at the door because I KNOW they will either NOT RSVP or will bring along extra guests.
The facebook thing happened to me, but for a family BBQ that FI and I were hosting. My cousin had not RSVPed and we were a week away from the BBQ so I asked her sister when I talked to her if she knew if B was coming. B's sister was not sure, I told her I would follow up with B. A couple of hours later, before I followed up, B sent me a message on facebook that said "Hey K told me that you wanted to know if I am coming next week. So, I am and I am bringing a date"
Um, great. I thought it was pretty rude because I sent out a big evite invitation for my family and they were supposed to RSVP on that. Second, I was inviting her to a family BBQ and was miffed why she needed to bring a date. It's not like my cousin is 16, she is a 40 yo divorcee who sees a lot of different guys.
In any case, RSVPing for a wedding via facebook is worse, but I thought I would share this story as well. Hopefully this cousin doesn't RSVP for the wedding this way and tell me that she is bringing a date, ha
eek i'm going to be in the minority here..... these are not ideal situations but i don't think they're a huge deal. sorry :/
yeah, I'm with CorgiTales - technology is inevitable, why not just embrace it? I mean, if you keep all your info on a spreadsheet, and you got a response on facebook, aren't you like three clicks away from your spreadsheet anyway? ...they're both on the computer.
I dunno, seems like a convenient solution to me.
As for your mom's friend, I would've just been like, "I'll have my mom give you a call later with the information." and let mom handle her.
I feel your pain! I was so frustrated with everyone who decided a "word-of-mouth" RSVP was a good reason to waste a stamp. Weddings guests today need some serious etiquette lessons.
lolol! I still can't understand why it is SO HARD to drop the pre-stamped and addressed thing in the male. Jebus.
On the other hand, at least they RSVPed. :p
Umm...soo the other day I totally got invited to wedding...by Facebook Events. No kidding. Mind you, it was a very last minute wedding (30 days out). But seriously? A facebook event invite for a wedding?! They even asked what meal you wanted in the event description.
I'm in the minority too, but I wouldn't mind. If I know you're coming I'll just mark you down as coming. Doesn't matter how I found out you're coming!
I think I'd have to say that the worst between the two would be courtesy guest calling at work. You should have been like "Um, do you think I carry my wedding stuff to work with me? No." LOL. I am thinking we will do RSVP post cards and have RSVP on our website for those who would rather do it that way (although I have some great aunts and uncles who aren't tech savy and would have to call to RSVP if they couldn't mail it back).
-Bella
I once got invited to a wedding by the groom via a facebook post on my wall... I went, cause he's a crazy friend from college, it was in my hometown and that's his style. Later I wondered if he neglected to get and give his wife the addresses for the people he invited that way(At least 5 of us in a group from college) or if some people didn't RSVP so there was room...I didn't really care, but that's the most laid-back wedding invite I've ever gotten.
I have to admit that I lost an RSVP card the other month. It had been in my handbag, and then I moved it in to another handbag, and then another, thinking "next time I walk past a post box I will post it!". Needless to say, I couldnt find it when I was at a post box and had to phone up and RSVP by phone. I did RSVP to the brides mum, as she was who the RSVP card was made out to. I did apologise!
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Just a quick morning vent -
I recieved an email on FB last night: "lost the invite, I'll be there. I'll eat whatever meal option you want"
Next, I just got a call at work from a friend of my Mom's from College who I have not seen in 16 years!!!!!!!
"Hi yogigal gal, this is your mom's annoying courtesy invite friend, I'm calling to find out when your wedding is" GASP. I didn't think she would come :(
I said "Oh, wow, hi, how are you? Didn't you get the invite?"
Annoying courtesy guest - "yes, I just can't find it and want to put in my vacation time today, can't wait to see you, I have been hearing so much about all the big fancy plans"
Seriously, I think next time all guests should get daily rsvp etiquette emails. I didn't include the little forever stamp just to get bothered at work and it is not an event on facebook that you can click yes or no for!!!