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Yeah, I didn't think you were supposed to wait more than 2 months to make sure that people know you received their gift. I wrote mine almost immediately because we were moving and I would probably have forgotten.
I think its a year after the wedding to send a gift... not to send a note. But, no worries. It happens. Maybe include in your thank you note what an exciting/busy few months its been? :)
If it makes you feel better, I just received a thank you note from a wedding I went to in early August!
Try to not to be too hard on yourself. I got married in September and am trickling out the Thank You cards. My parent's haven't even gotten their card yet and I live 2 mins away. Right after the wedding we were in the process of moving and so many things that got in the way. I think I may be sending out a bunch more this weekend...
BTW -- I haven't received the ty card for a wedding I attending in April...
Sorry, nothing else you can do except impress the board with your wonderful work so she thinks, well, she works so hard, that's why this thank you was late!
What the advice should have read was that your guests have up to a year after the wedding to send you a gift - you get the notes out as soon as you can after you receive the gift, with delays b/c of planning or honeymoon expected. So the only thank yous that go out a year later are for gifts that arrive a year later! (I'm ashamed to admit that I once set a really useful gift six months late...what she used until then I don't know!)
If it makes you feel any better we were date twins and I'm just getting around to writing my thank you cards too!! LOL. Relatives apparently have been calling my mother and bugging her for months about where their thank you card is. OH well, life got in the way-- mine should be out by Friday too!
Thanks MissCamera!! Yes, it totally makes me feel better. I'll check up with you on Friday! ;-)
And thank you everyone else for your words of wisdom..
Ugh, so embarrassing...
Well...now you know better so do better, try getting the cards out asap. Think of it this way, just like you were hard pressed and considered it rude that people didnt rsvp by the deadline...or maybe some never rsvp'd at all.....its the same. Your guests spent time and money...the least you can do is write a small note....and yeah life does get "busy"....but people make time for things that are important to them....so since your wedding was important for them to send a gift in this bad economy....go ahead and take a few moments out of each day to write the note.
awww, that is no fun to get embarrassed! two months is usually the time frame, and we were pushing it here because we were waiting on wedding photos (pro) to include in our thank yous, but we are getting them out THIS WEEK so I am happy about that. better late then never, anyway!
There are no hard and fast rules. And to be honest, I think it is pretty rude to ask someone if they received your gift b/c they didn't get a thank you! I wouldn't feel bad at all. Just send them out asap!
I wen't to a wedding in August and haven't yet received a TY-note - but it's a bit on the late side, I'd say. I really hope we'll be able to do ours in about 2-3 months.
I'd say just take the time to get them out as fast as possible.
And call me a stickler - but I would ask someone if they received my gift if they didn't send a note many months later. If I took the time to shop for/send a gift or attend a wedding (especially in this economy) why can't they take the time to send a note acknowledging it? As a bride didn't you get upset when people didn't RSVP after you sent them a stamped response card?
Live and learn. It's embarassing, but no one will remember this a month from now. Follow your thank you note with a card on your boss's birthday and you'll be back in her good graces before you know it.
People make mistakes. No need to beat yourself up over it.
@AprilBride10-----I totally agree and said the same! As Brides we have to be honest, we are very quick to call people rude and all kidns of other names for not rsvp'ing....and will even get upset if they don't bring/send a gift...but we have the audacity to say...let them wait....6...9 months to a year and our excuse is "I'm got busy". Now there are certain situations in life that can't control, but be fair
I went to a wedding a few years ago and I never got a thank you note -- I definitely thought they either didn't get my gift or didn't know it was from me, which made me feel kind of bad.
I get really anxious about these things and tend to err on the side of super prompt, but as long as you write a sincere note everything should be ok!
It happens... just go ahead and write your thank you notes now, and all will be forgotten. I actually don't think that I've ever received a timely thank you note for a wedding gift. Life gets in the way, and all of a sudden it's 4 months later, and no thank you notes have been sent out. As a wedding guest I do get slightly annoyed... not b/c I'm itching for a thank you note, but b/c I want to know that my gift arrived safely. Definitely send out your notes ASAP, but I wouldn't worry too much that they're late.
@Mrs2theDr: personally I didn't get upset that guests didnt RSVP, or that they complained how far away the wedding was, etc. so it isnt like I'm being a hypocrite. I dont think I ever called a guest names or acted like a bridezilla. Its just funny to me because my family knows I'm a procrastinator-- I dont know why they expected a card the week after the wedding :) I did mean to get them out before Christmas, but when you work full time & are in the process of starting your own business, plus getting back to the things you neglected during wedding planning, the last thing you want to do is sit down and write out thank you cards, isnt thanking them profusely in person and on the phone enough? Apparently they want cards they can show to everyone too.
I have to say that I think a lot of people are taking a bad approach with TYs. It's easy to make excuses, but the truth is that anybody can make the time. Even if you have to write 200 of them there's no reason they can't be finished over the course of one weekend, especially if the Mr. is helping out (which he should be, since the odds are that half of the guests are his). I'd be totally offended if I brought a gift and didn't get a card within the next 2-3 months.
LOL- I was never rude or mean to the guests who didn't rsvp! Nor was I planning on never writing the thank you notes! I think that a few of you didn't read my whole post... I read somewhere that I had a year to respond and I thought that was the protocol! So, for me to start them now, it seemed early. :-)
Anyway, the whole idea of ettiquette is to be "kind" to people and make others feel comfortable. That's it. In fact, according to this, I could say that the woman who wanted to know where her TY note was and asked me about it was not not using "proper ettiquette."
Oh well, I've calmed down since this morning. I realized that in the grande scheme of life, it really doesn't matter if I sent out my wedding thank you notes late or not!
So, second lesson learned for future brides: Don't stress if you do end up sending out your TY notes late. :-) ...oh, but send them out, of course!
In all seriousness, we just got a thank you note a couple of weeks ago for a wedding gift that we sent 16 months previously. A year isn't the worst thing I've ever heard of. :)
I think three months should be the max. If you can't get them all done in that time, start with the ones for the people you think would be the most offput by not getting one right away. That's my plan anyway.
I don't think it's rude to wait this long. But it creates a very awkward situation for everyone. She is wondering if her gift was even received and was probably battling over whether or not to ask you (which is a very tough decision), meanwhile you had every intention on sending the thank-you cards but hadn't gotten around to it.
It's just easier for everyone if you send thank you's or at least acknowledge receiving gifts sooner rather than later. There's really no way around it.
Oh, and BTW I still have not received thank you cards from weddings I attended years ago and would never dream about asking if they received the gift. The chances of a gift not actually arriving are so small, I just assume it got there. You can also call the manufacturer too to avoid stressing out the bride.
I just make a mental note that it was rude they never sent a thank you note and move on. I don't need to make a point by telling the Bride I didn't get her thank you note.
Don't beat yourself up too much - the point is to DO them!! Send them out; they'll be appreciated... it's like the saying: better late than NEVER!!!
personally i make it a rule to sit down asap and write thank you cards and i recall starting them hours after our after eloping wedding party because i feel they should get out asap (yes i didnt have to deal with a honeymoon but that should have only delayed things by a few weeks)
im not offended if i dont get one within a set period of time but i do think if someone has had months and not even started then it is a bit ungracious
I got married on the 9th of August, went on my honeymoon until the 21st and sent my TY cards by the 24th.
I also went to a wedding in September and got a thank you card last month.
Another one in October but no thank you card was received.
I had thought it was two months, but after doing some research, I've found that three is pretty much the consensus. Of course, I still haven't received thank you notes for either of the weddings I attended in August (both of which I sent a gift for in June, one of which I was a bridesmaid in!). Oh well. People will appreciate late notes, too. :)
We're more than halfway done with ours, but to be honest I was grappling with morning sickness shortly after the wedding and really could not write them with gusto until that resolved. Hopefully friends and family will forgive us... We're working on it every single night!
Don't feel bad. I've only gotten 2 thank you notes ever out of ALL the weddings I've been to in my entire life!!! (at least 15+) LOL
Guess I live in a rude country... hahahahaha
Oh, gosh! Well it's a good thing you're getting yours in the mail this week. I am probably just going to go ahead and send mine out as soon as I get back from the honeymoon! I'm not going to want to let go of the wedding by then, so that's just an extra fun task for me! :)
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Oh my gosh, I'm so embarrassed. I read a bad piece of wedding ettiquette, and thought that I had a YEAR to send out my wedding TY notes. Although, I was not going to wait an entire year, my wedding was in August, and I am just now, in January starting to write them.
Now, I just received a phone call from one of my company's elderly board members asking me if I received her gift because she never got a thank you note! Talk about embarrassing!
So, anyway, I tried googling this, and now I am finding MULTIPLE different responses... 5 weeks after the wedding, three weeks after the wedding, three months after the wedding...
Ugh, so is there anything else I should do aside from writing all of them asap?? I don't think I should be apologizing for the late TY. They'll all be in the mail by Friday!!
So, advice to other brides, don't wait so long to write the notes!