Post # 1
19 days till our wedding. Just stressed and need to vent.
Just seems like I can’t do anything right lately.
I’m 23, FI is 33. We are great together. He works like crazy during the week, but when we are home together everything is good. Just little things bugged me this weekend. I made cupcakes, and overcooked them, he wasn’t upset, but deff made it known that they were NOT good.
We went shopping and I was pushing the cart, and I accidently hit the back of his heel numerous times!
Yesterday he was upset because he thought the house was messy, I work a 9-5 job, come home and take care of numerous critters, try to clean, laundry, and cook dinner. I do the best I can. He was upset yesterday because the house was messy, he had these glass ornaments that were somewhat broken with layers of dust on them, I threw them out, he took the box to the dumpster, and it dropped, they broke even more.
He was sooo upset at me, I guess they were his GREAT grandmothers..now he’s upset with me. He then said not to throw away his dog’s ashes..ugh
I just can’t win! I know these things are minimal (except ornaments) I just am stressed and feeling sad..
Post # 3
First, it sounds like some of this is stress about the upcoming wedding. 3 weeks before the wedding is probably not he best time to evaluate the stress level in a relationship. If it has been this way for some time, that’s a red flag, but I think we can all agree that stress and bickering picks up a bit just before any big event.
Things like you overcooking cupcakes and him saying they taste bad are NOT A BIG DEAL. They probably did taste bad, and he was being honest. Unless he spit them out and threw one at your head, I think you’re overreacting.
Also, I would get pissed at DH if he ran over my heals at the store, so I’m with your DH on that front. There’s just no excuse for being that careless.
Next, it sounds like you two need to have better communication, especially when it comes to housework. It sound like you need to have a conversation about expectations around the house and get on the same page ASAP. What are you definitions of clean vs. messy? How often are things expected to be cleaned and by who?
Lastly, I couldn’t really follow the ornament argument. Why were they broken and dusty to begin with? Why did you throw them out without talking to him, and if he was taking them to the garbage, why would it matter if they got more broken? That one is just a head scratcher. But I will say this, DH has some collectables that are precious to him, and I have a strict “I don’t touch those” policy. Meaning I don’t clean, move, lift, or throw away. Those are his responsibility, and if they’re dusty or broken, it’s on him.
Post # 4
I didn’t realize his great grandmother gave them to him. They were partially broken and full of dust, so I threw them in a box to go down to dumpster. Yes, I should have asked him if they were to keep or not..
I wasn’t purposly being careless about the cart, just an accident.
Post # 5
@emricmacy: ((HUGS)) Sounds like both of you are stressed out!
Try to remember that you’re a team and you two need to work together. Give yourselves a “fun break” and go out and do something you both enjoy, just for a little while. Tell him you need a romantic date night and put all the stress on hold for little bit. You can get back to it later, lol.:)